Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Results for the New Digs Writing Contest

Thanks for helping us celebrate the move to the new office!

Some of the entries had amazing turns of phrase. Here are four that stood out:
"giddyup crowd" Lisa (9/14 12:22pm)

"space effervescence" and "star farts" A.E. Welch (9/14 12:51pm)

"the sweet gravity of a friendlier universe." 315herder (9/14 4:26pm)

I just loved these sentences:
"I guess after thirty-five years on the force in Arizona, when you hear someone’s an alien, you never consider they might be the kind armed with acid bubbles from the Carboric galaxy.”
Mrs Silverstein (9/14 12:26pm)

 "“Zorblaxagon, you’re the universe’s worst wingalien!” 
Steve Forti (9/14 4:31pm)

"My heart trampled through my chest, stepping on my lungs, kicking the crap outta my sternum." Kelley Harvey (9/15 9:52am)

Something I'm sure LaSlitherina knows how to do:
"use barbecue sauce for perfume" Patchi (9/14 1:13pm)

These just cracked me up:
"Bob the Alien" --Aspiring Author 9/14 7:41pm

"(Yes, I have a barbeque next to my bed.)" Lynn(e)Schmidt 9/15 2:53PM

"Whoever said there's someone for everyone never watched this guy eat. " Guzin1 9/15 3:00PM

Gives a whole new interpretation to "sweet and savory"
John Arkwright  (9/14 2:23pm)

These entries were good, but closer to a scene than a story:
daniellelapaglia 9/14 2:45pm
Nelson Gregg 9/14 3:53pm
David 9/14 4:46pm
Kim Velk 9/14 7:47pm
Sharon Davidson 9/15 1:25 am
Princess Sara 9/16/ 12:10am
xCoooooot  9/16 11:17am

holy moly!-not quite a story but deeply disturbing in a way that bodes well
for readers in the future!
Rebekah Stewart Yami 9/16 12:57pm

enigmatic but oh so enticing
Eric Morgan 9/14 4:35pm

hilarious political skewering
Otin 9/15 9:34am

These entries made the long list:
Colin Smith (9/14 2:59pm)
Patrick DiOrio (9/14 3:44pm)
Sam B (9/16 10:36 am) (with the best title ever  "The Hazards of Hooking in Area 51")

Here are the four finalists:
Sheila JG (9/14 4:39pm)

“Hold still, Mike,” I said, as he ripped off his shirt.

“Oh shit, it burns! It’s a BOB, isn’t it?”

I scanned his back, tweezers ready. Yep, there it was, between the shoulder blades - The Burrowing Oven Bug. The little alien ticks entered through the skin, and then gradually, over days, barbecued their host from the inside.

I pulled. A wing came off, the rest of the bug disappeared, leaving only a bubble of blood.

“Mike, if it gets in . . . “

He didn’t have to finish. I released the safety on my gun.

TeresaR (9/14 5:10pm)
Blame it on the stupid Labor Day cookout. I had the barbecue sauce on the grill and was about to stir it when I noticed a wing sticking out of the thick muck.

Ewww, right?

But it wasn’t that kind of wing. When I pulled it out, it was attached to a miniature spacecraft. Then I noticed the diminutive…alien…being tossed by the bubbles in the pot.

I watched it bob up and down a few times in horror before I had the sense to pull its limp body out.

No wonder they interpreted it as a hostile encounter. I’m sorry.

Ashley Whitt (9/14 11:11pm) (I had to read this one three times to get it)
The skipping rope and bubble wand lay abandoned.

Chalky letters spelt her name on a gritty sidewalk. Lucy. They knew her only as The Taker. Whether she was alien or god, that, they did not know. But occasionally, particularly on days that the sun seared the packed earth, one of their own would go missing.

They would send scouts, darting into the open air, with heads that bobbed above the grassline, but it was futile. All they would find was a wing. A leg. The smell of burnt thorax.

Glass turned light into a deadly beam.

A cruel barbeque, indeed.

Sisi (9/16 9:30am)
A whole hour to talk about some story called “Bernice Bobs Her Hair?” Michael slunk lower into his desk, longing for a fire alarm, an alien invasion, anything. Across the aisle Trevor nibbled on some barbecued meat from a baggie. Two rows over Harrison blew a huge bubble and showed it off to Lexi.

Lexi, who made that stupid song, “The Wind Beneath My Wings” play in his head. She smiled at Trevor, and Michael looked away.

When the window shattered and a figure too tall to be human stepped through, Michael sat frozen in fear and guilt and relief.

And the winner is:

Ashley Whitt (9/14 11:11pm) 
Ashley, drop me a line and we'll either set you up for a query/ms critique (one or the other, not both) from my boon companion in crime Brooks Sherman, OR if you don't need that, we'll find a good book for you!  Congratulations.
Congratulations too for all the entries! Thanks for helping us celebrate!


Colin Smith said...

Congratulations, Ashley! Another set of great entries. These contests are such fun!

And I made the "Long List"!! A cool way to start my day. Thanks, Janet! :)

Angie Brooksby said...

Congratulations to Ashley and all of you that made it. I posted mine before the contest was updated with the prize and offer of coffee.

Congratulations on the new office

A. E. Welch said...

Congrats Ashley! I'm excited about my turn of phrase shout-out :)

Terri Lynn Coop said...

Superb Ashley, indeed a "slow burn." Great batch of entries, this was a tough one!

Congrats one and all!


Sam B said...

So excited to make the long list. And my coffee is excellent. It's going to be a good day! Or go downhill from here.

Nice entry, Ashley!

TeresaR said...

Congratulations, Ashley! But, woohoo for me too...I was a finalist! :)

That was fun...thanks, Janet!

soonerson1978 said...

Ashley's story from the bug kingdom was great, but wasn't the word to be used "bubbles"? That was one of the biggest challenges of the contest, to use the word in its plural form. Of the four finalists, only TeresaR used "bubbles."

Just wanted to point that out.

TeresaR said...

Soonerson1978, I read the other stories and totally missed that; thanks for pointing it out! :)

Mrs. Silverstein said...

Congrats, Ashley, that's pretty great! This one yielded some very cool stories!

Janet Reid said...

oh shit.

SiSi said...

Great story, Ashley--I love the twist in the perspective! And how nice to see I was a finalist. That was a wonderful boost that I really needed after a long, long (long) day at work.

Colin Smith said...

To soonerson1978's point, I notice that many people take a certain amount of liberty with the chosen words anyway, using them in the plural, or some other form. I try to use the words as given, but that's just me. In fact, I suspect Janet takes the same approach to judging the winning entry as she does to determining a winning query letter: if it knocks her socks off, it's a winner, even if it fudges the rules a bit. And I'm fine with that. Ashley's entry certain was a sox-knocker-offer. :)

Sheila JG said...

Oh, Ashley, that was awesome. Congrats!

Thanks for the contest! And I hope you are enjoying your new digs.

TeresaR said...

No worries, Janet. It's your blog contest and you can judge how you want to!

Ashley Whitt said...

Thanks everyone! I'm really proud of the way my entry turned out. Congratulations to all the other entrants and finalists. And thank you Janet for the amazing opportunity.

Charley said...

Good stories, good lines. Congrats!