I found this. I may take up a collection to fund the purchase! Don't you think it would set exactly the right tone for The Reef? Better yet, I could bring it to writing conferences!
Or wait...this could be the Best Christmas Present EVAH for my most slithery colleague of all: Barbara Poelle!
i see it as the new entrance to the Reef:
Chomp ye all who enter here . . .
Is that the life-size model of Mick Jagger's mouth singing "Honky Tonk Women" on display at the Rock n Roll Hall of Fame? Cool.
Your Sharkiness awes and inspires. I hope Santa is taking notes! :)
I hope it's a reproduction made with lightweight materials...otherwise, shipping might prove rather problematic and costly!
(Please ignore if this is a dub-post, I'm having tech issues.)
In theory, putting a Megalodon jaw in "the reef" is a great idea. However, you should really think this through.
Despite the urgings of a number of feng shui masters, the temptation of placing the jaw at the front entryway would simply be too difficult to overcome.
Once in place, you'd have to endure hearing MerBer repetitively say "watch out for the teeth" to delivery men and visiting dignitaries alike. A rift would grow between you when she tired of saying the phrase and the cost of constantly replacing Megalodon teeth ravaged your bottom line.
To repair the rift, you’d agree to rig the jaw to snap shut, with a hydraulic system.
It’d only be a matter of time before one of you closed the jaws on some poor writer, whom made the mistake of querying without sacrificing a bottle of Macallan 12.
As a condition of your parole, you’d need to maintain a safe distance away from sharks and shark accessories. To escape a hellish identity crisis, you’d turn to drink, but, because legal fees ate away your savings, you’d literally drown yourself in a puddle of Jim Beam.
Sean may or may not abstain from commenting about irony at your funeral.
That said, it’d look pretty cool in the office, and at less than $.50 a year, it’d be hard to pass up.
To much brushing and flossing.
Why wait for Christmas? When is the slithery one's birthday? Make it a birthday to remember.
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