Are people really that clueless? This saddens me a little, until I remember less competition when the time comes since people don't know how to research.
Have you ever considered looking for potential new clients through online writing sites, particularly ones for cell phones? The reason I ask this is because I write on two sites: textnovel.com and mobamingle.com. I use my cell to compose each page online because I don't have a computer yet. I've completed one novel, I have over 100 fans following me on mobamingle, and 3000+ views. I'm just wondering if you, or any other agent, would ever take the time to browse work on there. I need to know if I'm wasting my time with it. I have the ability to submit a query letter because I have copy & paste, but I don't have the ability to attach any manuscripts if I ever made it past that first step. Get what I mean? Or am I just rambling? Lol...
"What a coincidence! I've chosen YOU to clean my apartment, walk my dog and then dash out to the liquor store for me!
After that I would like a nice light dinner, homemade with all organic ingredients accompanied by a nice French Shiraz, then a deep tissue foot massage before you run my bath (Don't forget the add mare's milk so my skin stay silky soft).
While I am bathing, you can tidy up before you ask my permission to go home, which I will refuse. I mean... honestly! There's still the laundry to do. Don't make me discipline you with the ping pong paddle again! Serf!"
37 comments:
Well, you know, we're supposed to make the agent feel special, aren't we?
If wishes were horses then beggars would ride...
I have chosen you to make me laugh at 7:07 pm eastern time.
I bet you feel honored. Did he/she sign you? ;-)
LOL. That's a little bit like saying "I have chosen you to carry my child." Creepy!
My response, if I were you:
"Me?!!? Little (young) me?!?"
*Delete*.
Well, I have. You got a problem with that?
Lucky you!
Are people really that clueless? This saddens me a little, until I remember less competition when the time comes since people don't know how to research.
mwuahuahauh
Oh, wow. I should have thought of that!!!
Where do people come up with this stuff???
Too funny!
Yikes! No ego troubles there :)
Sucking up, or an overabundance of confidence?
Or both?
LOL, can we DO that?
Love the new tagline...
Have you ever considered looking for potential new clients through online writing sites, particularly ones for cell phones? The reason I ask this is because I write on two sites: textnovel.com and mobamingle.com. I use my cell to compose each page online because I don't have a computer yet. I've completed one novel, I have over 100 fans following me on mobamingle, and 3000+ views. I'm just wondering if you, or any other agent, would ever take the time to browse work on there. I need to know if I'm wasting my time with it. I have the ability to submit a query letter because I have copy & paste, but I don't have the ability to attach any manuscripts if I ever made it past that first step. Get what I mean? Or am I just rambling? Lol...
And you may have already won a million dollars!!!
:-P
(Of course, now you have the title for your memoir, should you ever write one.)
I didn't know we were allowed to say that!
Janet, I've chosen you to be my agent. You'll really like me. :)
I love the line from "Garp" (movie, admittedly):
"He seems like a nice man. I think I'll let him publish my book".
(Paraphrase!)
This is what happens when extreme introverts Try Too Hard.
The psychic told me my agent would have the initials JR, so please contact me for an interview in case you're the one.
That subject line just screams that the book will be pretentious drivel, doesn't it?
Look into the spinning hypno-disc I got from Johnson, Smith & Co......
Email author: clueless.
Me: speechless. (Well, between giggles and head shaking, that is)
I'm surprised it got through the spam filter.
Well aren't you the lucky one...
Probably just a misunderstanding...
LOL
We actually got that one too.
I have chosen you to
-give me a job
-accept me into your university
-award me an Osacar
-help me get my lottery winnings from the Nigerian government.
LOL
Weelll, it did get your attention, the wrong kind of attention ...
Don't you feel special, Janet? You are the Chosen One! Now, go find that amulet before the world explodes. :-)
Someone on Twitter had the same query, but she also tweeted the first line of the query:
Dear Ladies and Gentlemen
How many agents are we allowed to choose, anyway? Is this guy hogging them all?
Congratulations, Janet! You must be thrilled.
How about, "I want you to be my Binky Urban" :)
Reply:
"What a coincidence! I've chosen YOU to clean my apartment, walk my dog and then dash out to the liquor store for me!
After that I would like a nice light dinner, homemade with all organic ingredients accompanied by a nice French Shiraz, then a deep tissue foot massage before you run my bath (Don't forget the add mare's milk so my skin stay silky soft).
While I am bathing, you can tidy up before you ask my permission to go home, which I will refuse. I mean... honestly! There's still the laundry to do.
Don't make me discipline you with the ping pong paddle again! Serf!"
There... that ought to take care of that.
Unless she's Anne Rice.
Did the letter end with "bim salabim?" Sheesh! I have chosen Jon Hamm as my new pillow - alas, I have no powers and a husband.
I laughed.
Post a Comment