Me: Your Grace, where are you? It's time for your elevenses petting.
Me: Your Grace?
Me: Where are you Duchess?
Me: (looking under sofa) hmmmm
Me: (looking in cat cave of blankets on bed) oh crap, where is she??
Me: (checking screens on windows for cat-shaped tears) ok, she's IN HERE somewhere, right? (looks at ceiling)
Me: If I've lost that cat INSIDE this apartment, I'm never going to live this down.
Me: (opening fridge for medicinal sip of white wine)
DoY: oh hello there.
Me: What the HELL? You're IN the refrigerator?? How long have you been in there?
DoY: When did you last open the door (Einstein!)?
Me: You've been in there for 30 minutes!
DoY: I was inventorying the cheese. And the cream. And the tuna salad.
Me: Do I need to stock up?
DoY: (licking whiskers) you do now.