As I'm perambulating about the interwebs my eye catches on what looks to be a very spiffy event:
Berkeley Mystery Writing Intensive--
Nov. 21 & Sunday, Nov. 22
For starters, it features the ever-fabulous Cornelia Read, my boon companion in scotch, thigh high boots (hers not mine) and Edgar banquets (I think we'll need a dispensation from the MWA board to ever attend again).
And then I notice another presenter is Peter Riegert! Holy moly! For starters, Peter Riegert was in two of my all time favorite movies, Animal House and Local Hero. He was also in one of my favorite NYC movies- Crossing Delancey. I'm a drooling Peter Riegert fan! (tmi?)
I'm damn near tempted to sign up myself despite not being a mystery writer in the slightest.
Given it's at the Claremont Spa, I figure I can hang out with Cornelia when she's not busy teaching, and ogle Peter Riegert like a besotted fan girl.
Heck it's only $249, and JetBlue will get me there nicely.
I'm practically set to click on Register, when I read further. Dear Reader, I blanched:
Literary agents, published authors, and an Academy Award–nominated actor/writer/director will help aspiring authors complete and sell their work.
Wait a damn minute here. *I* am a literary agent! Why am *I* not on the roster? Who would they invite instead of ME?
And yes, there it is in black and white:
Barbara Poelle, a top-selling New York agent with the Irene Goodman Literary Agency will talk about trends in publishing and instruct authors on how to write project and query letters.
Well the only damn trend in publishing I'm noticing is that slithery Barbara Poelle is kicking ass and taking names. This must stop, and I mean NOW.
So, if you have an ounce of goodwill for me, you will register for this workshop and keep that slithery competitor of mine BUSY BUSY BUSY with seminars, and query letters. Keep her so busy I can manage to sell something while she's not looking.
If you can get in some ogle time for Peter Riegert, so much the better. Send pictures.
Here's how to register: Berkeley Mystery Workshop
And if you ever catch up with that Sophie Littlefield person, just tell it's too late now. It's a BAD DAY FOR SORRY, sister, and this is WAR!