Self-pubbing short stories

I’m the kind of guy who’s always been of the mindset that traditional publishing is the way to go. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had opportunities to speak with several indie authors and I love that they’re earning a living (far more of a living than I am with my day job) doing something they love. If I were any other kind of person I’d be jealous and rushing to join their ranks. Thankfully, patience is my middle name.

I’ve written and “trunked” three novels over the past four years for various reasons. I’ve had some short stories published, but nothing professional (i.e., no payment for the publishing). I’m currently working on (what I plan and hope to be) a series of novels I believe will not find themselves in the trunk. (In other words, I feel like I’m on the brink of some kind of success).

With this series, and more importantly the first book, I’m on the fence about whether to pursue self-publishing. For reasons stated here and here, I feel I want to continue with my die-hard pursuit of a traditional publishing contract. However, given all the buzz from the indie world (and some buzz from folks I’ve spoken with in the traditional world) I fully understand the need for an author to have an ability to promote and market his or her work, despite publishing options. With that in mind, I’ve been developing a website and working toward building an email list specifically to help with this promotion and marketing.

I realize this seems more a self-publishing tradition, but I assume (perhaps wrongly) that it wouldn’t hurt a traditionally published author to have a bit of a following. To help generate that following, I intend to offer short stories as a lead magnet to entice people to join my mailing list, etc. I’m also toying with the notion of self-publishing several other short stories and novellas to continue generating interest until (not if – fingers crossed) the first book is published.

Here's my question: given all the talk we’ve had about how bad self-publishing gives you baggage (and realizing that I would treat these short stories as professionally as I would a novel) would self-publishing shorts in this way be detrimental to a future traditionally published career? (i.e., I’m concerned about all the talk we have about sales figures from a previously self-published author with a second book being the “baggage” agents and publishers won’t want to touch.) I want to be proactive, but I’m also afraid (woodland creature)

My instinct tells me to be cautious, but it also says that shorts are a different animal than novels so I might be okay.

You're just not phrasing this correctly. Here's what you mean to say: I'm building my mailing list by publishing work that will appeal to people who will want to read my novel.

Once you phrase this correctly, you understand this is a very good thing, and huzzah to you for taking the promotion bull by the horns and giving him a waltz around the dance floor.

Far from being a detriment, this is something that would make me sit up and take notice in a query. You don't need platform to sell a novel, but if you include "I have a robust mailing list of 500+ readers" in your bio, well, yes, that makes my fin wriggle.

And if you need an example of a guy who's doing this, you need look no further than Jeff Somers.  Follow his Twitter feed to see how he promotes his self-pubbed stories, and builds his mailing list.  Jeff is a lot of things (likely drunk, likely pantsless, likely to be eaten by zombie cats after the apocalypse) but not proactive isn't one of them. He calls himself lazy; I roar with laughter when he does. Watch what he does, not what he says.

Wait, that's all?

Friend of mine queried last summer, got multiple offers by October/November. Signed with agent awesome (great sales record - powerhouse in the category/genre) in December. After signing, communication was virtually non existent (3-4 emails total in six months). Author didn't mind. Figured it was just how this agent functions. After two rounds of edits with pretty limited editorial notes, agent says it might be best to step aside without much explanation at all.

Now that recently signed debut* author is again agentless with a book that never went on sub,

1) would protocol dictate that it's okay to reach back out to agents b or c who offered but weren't selected explaining the situation?

2) can author re-query or reach out to those who had partials/fulls who were interrupted by competing agents offer for rep and passed. Or

3) is author pretty much stuck writing a new debut and starting from square one (write new book, query, etc)?

(1) Yes
(2) Yes
(3) Nope

Your friend (who is NOT a *debut author because the book hasn't been sold, let alone published) missed one key element of the signing process: ask the agent offering representation how much work s/he thinks the novel needs before it can go on submission. It sounds like your pal thought s/he would sign with agent, and the ms would go on submision fairly soon thereafter.

This is almost never the case. I can think of only one author I sent out without revisions (Patrick Lee). Everyone else had at least some typos to fix and probably more than half had some major revisions.

My guess here is that your friend did not nail the revisions the agent was looking for. This happens more than any of us would like. It's actually one of the reasons I often ask for revisions BEFORE I sign someone. If they can't revise, it's a huge red flag. Editors will ask for revisions too. I can think of only a couple books that didn't have multiple-page editorial letters before the book was sent into production.

But back to your question: if the book has not been sent to editors, it's fine to query again. Your friend needs the "my former agent I parted ways amicably, before this was sent on submission" probably near the top of the letter for those agents being requeried.

Your friend should be prepared to talk about why s/he parted ways with the agent. When I see that in a query, I do not assume the agent is a dunderhead.

R&R? Reject and retreat!

What is the proper etiquette for a querier who receives editorial comments and R&R from a literary agent, but after careful consideration, decides not to proceed with the revision? Polite email explaining why? No response? Ignore R&R and query the next book when ready? None of the above?

While "You're a dunderhead for suggesting this" is probably not the best choice, it's also true, even the polite version of that - "Thanks but no thanks"- isn't going to get you anywhere.

You're under no obligation to follow an agent's advice.
Some of us them give terrible advice, it's true.

But no one, not even dunderheads, likes to hear our pearls of wisdom are being discarded as worthless trinkets.


Thus "thank you for your notes; I appreciate your time and insight" is all you need to say. That their insight made you realize they are idiots, can go unsaid. Or that you don't intend to implement their suggestions.

If, at some point in the future, the agent gets in touch to ask whatever happened to your retelling of Casino Royale with dogs,

that's when to say "I decided to go in a different direction." Unless they ask, you don't have to tell. 

But just one more little trinket of wisdom: before you write off editorial comments and revision suggestions, let some time pass.  Some of our advice is better after it sits awhile. Yanno, like novels.

"I don't want to clutter their inboxes"

I've been querying a novel over the past eight months during which it went through one total rewrite and one large revision. I know, I know, as a first time writer, you think something’s ready only to learn the hard way. But now, it seems like the pieces are finally coming together and it’s gotten a lot of requests and upgrades lately — probably because of some of the early agents who were kind enough to give me real feedback along the way.

In the age of no response means no and form rejections on fulls, I'm grateful to those agents who took the time to help make this a better book and me a better writer. Some of them said to let them know if I revise this work to resend, which I think it’s finally time to do that, and some said something about sending future work.

I don’t want to clutter their inboxes, but should I bother asking them if they want to see the revised version? Or should I firmly conclude the concept was not for them and just keep them on the list in case this MS doesn’t result in an offer? Am I reading too much or not enough into the wording? It’s like being stretched on a ouija board!

Let's be very very clear about something: I need good stuff to sell or I'll be out of business. Thus, it's in MY best interest to see as much good stuff as I can. And we all know it's all about me me me, right?

We may differ on what we call good stuff, but I hope that you believe your stuff is good. Thus, you're eligible for chomping if you did not at least give me a heads up on the revisions.

I know agents yap endlessly about being overworked, and I spent a good portion of this weekend sending emails that started with "I'm sorry I've been so slow to respond" so too much email is a problem, yes.

BUT that is absolutely irrelevant to YOU.
You have a project that you KNOW is good.
I need projects to sell.
Nothing else should factor in to your decision about whether to reach out to agents me me me.

And just a reminder: believe us when we say nice things to you, ok?

Well, maybe not epic, but....

If an agent who gives editorial feedback offers representation, is it appropriate (as part of the pre-acceptance process) to ask them to pick a section of the ms they think needs work and give editorial remarks? That is, in addition to discussing their vision for the ms in a general way, which I seem to recall you saying a writer should expect. The purpose being to see what it would be like to work with them on that level. If that's okay, rather than epic ass-hattery, what size section would be appropriate and not an imposition?

uhh...no.

No.

No.

No.

An agent is not auditioning for the lead in Editor On the Roof.

Either she's already given you notes;  she thinks chapter seven is fine; OR you're going to get notes and see what she thinks. It's entirely acceptable to ask "do you think the manuscript needs work; if so, what kind, how much etc." You can even ask "do you think chapter seven needs work?"

BUT saying "can you give me edit notes on chapter seven before I decide to say yes or no to your offer of representation" is not something you want to do.

Presumably by the time you've gotten to this point with an agent you know something about how she works. For example, you might have asked her clients if she gives notes to them, how fast that happens, how useful they are, and so on.

You might have read her blog to see if she can string words together herself.

You might have actually done a round of revisions with her before the offer was made.

But asking someone to give notes as part of the offer fails to recognize that until she sells something, she's got no income from you. In other words, you're asking for a favor. You'll want to be judicious in those asks.

You can get this information, or enough of it to be useful for your decision, without asking her to do more work than she has offered up voluntarily.

I'm glad you asked this question because it is one that would make me reconsider taking someone on, and I'd hate to see that happen if the writer just didn't know how it would be perceived on this end.

you didn't, oh gadzooks, you did.

Three weeks ago, I got a Full request from an agent and I quickly submitted my Full to her.

Then last week, another agent emailed me, saying she enjoyed my submission and would be delighted to read the Full, but that the agency only read on an exclusive basis.
I replied back, attaching my Full and confirmed that the first agency still have my Full but haven't yet got back to me and that I promised not to submit my Full to any other agents whilst she was considering it. I asked her if this was agreeable and also for a rough indication of timescale for reading my novel exclusively, but she didn't respond and there is no indication the agency website.

Then, lo and behold, I've just had a third request for my Full this afternoon, but have had to explain to this agent that I can't currently submit my MS to her, as it is out on an exclusive, but would she be prepared to wait for now, until I get clarification from the exclusive agent?

I then dropped Ms Exclusive agent a brief, polite email explaining that I have just received another Full request but have obviously not submitted as I agreed to exclusive arrangement and could she give me a rough idea when she might be able to get back to me?

She still hasn't replied.

I have never had an exclusive request before – I'm assuming Ms Exclusive will read my MS - she didn't reply saying she wouldn't - and I did clarify that it was only with one other agency.

How would you advise that I proceed?!

The first agent who requested my MS, e-mailed me a week ago to say she will be back at work this Monday after a week's holiday and will be in touch this coming week.

Remember when I told you exclusives sucketh the Large Lemon Drop?
No?
Ok, here's where I said it again.

And in case you need that third iteration: Exclusives Stink.

Your first (well, only) mistake was Agreeing To A Deal She Didn't Offer.
 She asked for an exclusive.
You sent the ms and ADDED: I won't send this to anyone else till you let me know.

Because she has not AGREED to your offer, you don't have a contract with her. And by contract I mean an agreement about the terms of exclusivity (duration for starters.)

You are free to submit this manuscript to Agent #3.
When (I hope) Agent #1 calls with an offer, you notify Agents #2 and #3 of the offer.


I have no idea why you thought it was a good idea to hamstring yourself with Agent #2 by saying you'd stop sending your work out to people actively asking to see it.  That gives Agent #2 more
power over your career trajectory than anyone deserves. You also let her set the terms; NEVER DO THAT. If you're agreeing to something, you offer terms that are favorable to YOU, and let her negotiate. 

Exclusives assume an agent's time is more valuable than yours. That is not true and any agent who says that (or thinks it without saying it) has a skewed view of themselves.

Exclusives are never in a writer's best interest and an agent who would ask you to do something that isn't in your best interest is not an agent I'd want to work with (nor should you.)

I will tell you that exclusives seem to be much less prevalent in the YA market where there is a lot of competition for good manuscripts.  The YA agents I know read manuscripts overnight, and have notes in the morning for the author on hot projects.

If an agent doesn't like to lose something cause they're slow, there's one easy answer to that: read faster. It's not like we are operating under varying time/space continua.

Questions an agent asks before signing

What kind of questions do you ask authors before signing? If you've read a full manuscript and think, "Hey, this is a shark-worthy story", what questions are you going to ask the author before offering to sign her, to see if she's got what it takes to swim with a shark?

1. How offended are you by an agent who says fuck every third word? More than "some?" --ding!

2. How offended are you by revision suggestions? More than "any?" --ding!
3. How mad at me are you going to be if I can't sell this? Totally?? --DING.

Ok, I'm pulling your leg on this.

My first question is always:
(1)what's your long term goal? 
Publishing is a long game and it's essential we both know where you want to end up before we start strategizing about how to get there.

(2)What else do you want to write? 
I've learned by experience to ask this sooner rather than later. A novelist who really wants to write screenplays, or non-fiction, needs a different playbook than a novelist who wants to write a series, or stand alones.

(3)Have you talked to my other clients?
Do you know what you're in for? I want to make sure prospective clients have talked (or at least emailed) with current clients.


(4) What questions do you have?



(5) What are you worried or nervous about?

(6) What haven't I asked about that I should have?


(7) Are you ok with my active social media presence**
This has to be asked with more subtley in that writers will say "oh it's no problem" cause that's the expected answer. I've learned to listen for the questions they ask that indicate they are NOT ok with it. 



This isn't some kind of industry standard in that if an agent doesn't ask, there's a red flag. This is my list. Other agents might ask different things.

My agent hates my new book. Not just sorta, either. A LOT. What to do?

I had an agent for (5) years with a well-known NYC agency, and although my initial novel had some interest, it didn’t end up going anywhere. Which is ok . . . it blends genres, and I knew it’d be a hard sell. However, I recently sent my agent another MS, which she’s since declined. Her critique was honest and decent, and she stressed that it was only her opinion and I could feel free to shop it around to see if anyone else might be interested.

So I’m kind of at a crossroads; I knew this new novel would also be difficult (all told in the present tense, doesn’t fit neatly into a genre, unsympathetic protagonist, etc.). But I’m also a firm believer that an author should write the kind of stories he/she wants to read . . . the trick being to pick stories other people want to read also. However, I didn’t expect my biggest critic to be my agent, who wasn’t even interested in a revision (the things that caused her angst being endemic to the story).

The agent liked the writing and some of the elements, but wasn’t digging the main character or how the plot developed. I guess what I’m wondering is: 1) does this happen often, and 2) would it be gauche mentioning the agency in a query letter? Or even sending query letters? I’ve had the first (50) pages workshopped with my book club, and the response was very positive (he said, knowing the next 280+ pages could suck). But agents have to make money, and I don’t know if this is simply a nice way of saying she doesn’t think the MS is up to par. I guess I’m looking for a Diogenes (with a pectoral fin) to light the way . . . if you have any opinions one way or the other, I’d love to hear them.

oh boy.
This is one of the questions you want to ask an agent before you sign on the dotted line: "what if I write something you hate. How do you handle that?"

My job is selling the work my clients write.

There are some exceptions to that: I will not send a book on submission if I find it offensive. That's simply my personal position, and I will tell a client that if needed. I hope we will have determined this BEFORE the book is written, but you never know.

I try not to send out books that I don't think will sell. That said, I've sold some stuff that I thought needed more work.

When I get a project that I'm hesitant about, I talk to my client. Your agent has done that too. She's said "shop around."

You now have two choices: sever, or write something else.

I can't tell you what to write, and I wouldn't presume to tell you your agent is wrong about a novel I've never read.

It's always less terrifying to do nothing, but you can't do that and have a career.

Talk to your agent again. Be ready to listen to what she's telling you. Ask her to be completely straightforward.  Does she want you write something new, or is this a sign she doesn't think you're a good match.

Agents need to make sales to stay in business. If she's shopped one novel to no avail, and gotten a second in that she doesn't like at all, be ready to hear that she's not as enthusiastic as you want.

As to your questions: this happens enough that my colleagues and I talk about it pretty often. It's a horrible situation for us, just like it is for you.

You can't query if you have an agent.  There are probably some agents out there who will talk to you on the down-low, but it's considered a pretty slimy practice.

I'll talk in general terms to an author who has an agent, but my most frequent advice to them, as it is to you here: talk to your agent directly. Find out what she's thinking. Make your decision based on that information.




PS I'm having "Diogenes (with a pectoral fin)" engraved on my business cards.

Metamorphosis

I am a very small-time published author (m/m erotic romance), a genre I originally stumbled into (seriously) so that I could have a publishing history in the hopes of one day getting an agent for my young adult material. While I have enjoyed writing m/m, I feel it is time to "move on", and have begun querying agents for one of my YA novels. Your September 5, 2015 blog post post about being reachable, however, has made me wonder if I shouldn't delete my m/m persona just yet, although I am eager to leave the old "me" behind and delete my Goodreads author page, my blog and my Facebook presence. I simply feel that clinging to my old pen name is holding me back from pursuing a possible future as an author of young adult novels, or perhaps even some of my more conventional romances. I'm at a crossroads, and wondering which way to go.


Basically, my question is thus: should I wait until I'm done querying so that potential agents can find me on the world wide web, or should I jump in with both feet, delete the past, and go after what I want? Even if I'm unsuccessful, I have no plans to go back to writing m/m, its just not where my heart (or muse) is. In fact, I'm not even sure if I should tell agents when I'm querying about my published work--do you think they would they hold it against me? Would you?

If you know you're moving on,  make the changeover now. Do so for the same reason you don't buy new curtains for an apartment you're leaving in two months.

Invest forward.

The post on Be Reachable meant you should be reachable NOW, not that I need to see what you did in the past. I want to talk to you about your NEW work, not have a discussion about your old work.  Time enough for that later.

A lot of people have publishing credentials they don't want to talk about. It's not a deal breaker at all.

While the subject matter may not be suitable to every taste, it's not like you're publishing stories about evil librarians which would be a total deal breaker.

Query Question: an editor has my ms; how do I list that in the query

 I have a procedural query question. If my MS is currently out with an editor, following a pitch conference, I understand it is appropriate to note that in my query. Is that information to include in the first paragraph, last paragraph, or even the subject line?

It's a housekeeping measure and you put it in the last paragraph.


And lest you think this is a selling point for your work, let me pour a bucket of cold water on you by telling you it's not.

The reason it's not is that once an editor has read your manuscript, an agent can't go back to him/her with the polished up version you'll have after some developmental work. Your agent in fact can't go to anyone at that imprint again.


There's a reason we BEG you to query agents first and it's exactly for this reason. The editor you meet at the conference may not be the right editor at that publisher for your book. You can't know. We do.


I know it's unbelievably tempting to think of yourself as The Exception to that, but you're not. No one is. 


Don't pitch editors at conferences. Talk to them about what they like to read, or what they're specially looking for but if you can hold back on pitching your agent will thank you.

Agent question: mellifluous she' aint

As you suggested, I've started querying widely, and I got a bite from an apparently-respected agent at a long-established boutique agency. While there has been no offer of representation yet, we've talked on the phone a couple of times and it's clear that she "gets" my nonfiction book, loves my platform, and has plenty of experience, expertise, and connections. She's asked for sample chapters and our next conversation will likely be The Call.

I may be getting ahead of myself, but I'm panicking because as great as this agent looks on paper, and as much as she seems to respond to my work, I found her really annoying on the phone--she talks nonstop in a whiny voice and won't stop bragging about her other clients and the great deals she's landed them.

I know she's trying to impress me as much as I'm trying to impress her, but I cringe when I imagine her pitching MY book to editors in the same way. Clearly, though, she's the real deal and has managed to represent plenty of writers effectively. I still have queries out there, but I've also had some rejections; would I be crazy to pass this up?

Yes.
Most agents pitch by email, and no one cares what she sounds like anyway. Editors care about the books she's bringing them. 


The other thing to realize here is you've talked to her only a few times.  If she's making deals, she's on the phone to editors a lot, and they've gotten used to her voice if they ever noticed it at all.


And you're right to realize she was trying to impress you as much as you were trying to impress her. 


We've all got flaws. If this agent gets your work, and you think she can sell your work, that's what matters.

Query question: will an agent be willing to work with me on developmental things?

I have a three book (so far) fiction series published through (book one) Amazon Encore and (books twos two and three) Booktrope Editions. I also have a novella with Booktrope as well as another one which I've self published. All have excellent and predominantly verified reviews on Amazon and sell well. I also edit fiction and nonfiction and am a published freelance writer.

My question is, given my writing experience (I am not bragging. I realize there are many more authors with more experience) would an agent (in general) be willing to work with me with a piece of fiction I'm working on but is not finished? I'd like to present a story synopsis and wonder an agent would be willing provide insight etc. to create a mutually beneficial fiction piece to then have that agent submit to publishers.

I suspect the answer is some version of, "Absolutely not", but I've had many peers send in manuscripts an agent has turned down because they weren't the right story. I thought maybe it would be advantageous for both to work on a concept together.

No.

Here's why: a query letter (regardless of publication credits) that says "here's some of a novel, can you give me some insight on how to finish this to make it something publishers will snap right up" demonstrates a severe misunderstanding of what my job actually is.

My job is to sell your work.  It's NOT to edit, proofread, copy edit, fact check, develop, bounce ideas off of, or anything other than sell, and then advocate for you during the publishing process.

Yes, I do all those other things, but they're generally for books that were sent to me as full, finished books.  Books I loved and wanted to sell, and thus wanted to spruce up a bit before going out.

It sounds like what you want is for an agent to help you figure out what will sell.

If we knew, we'd tell you.

Well, no we wouldn't. We'd look for it, sign it and sell it and keep our mouths shut.

The best thing I can tell you here is write the book that only you can write. Write the book that you're passionate about, that if someone tells you it's not the right story, you know they're wrong.

Query Question: I'm not sure you're good enough, when do I tell you?

 Your Imperial Toothiness,

I have a question for the blog, if possible, which is sort of related to the recent theme of incomplete information.

Suppose Agent A has your full, and after that request you discover some former clients saying concerning things about the practices at the agency to which Agent A belongs (not specifically about Agent A, but about the leadership team there and other agents).

For example, some former clients are telling really similar stories about different agents at the agency just spraying your MS at everyone with no thought or targeting, and then being evasive about giving clients their submission information. If true, these seem like big warning signs about the agency, no matter how cool Agent A seems. On the other hand, obviously you don't have the full story, only tales on the internet.

Is this the sort of thing that is OK to hold off on acting unless and until you get an offer? That is, should you just wait and see whether you get further interest and then raise the issues directly with Agent A so that you can decide once you have better information?

Or is it unethical to just wait and see, and potentially waste Agent A's time reading your full if in the end you're unwilling to take the risk that the rumours/reports are true? If you feel like there's a good chance you're just not going to be comfortable with the agency, should you just withdraw the MS?

Oh man, I love the interwebz! For all the good this new transparency has done for authors, it's also a source of the worst kind of gossip, backbiting and just plain vile lies. Also known as "the other guy's opinion."

For example, a former client says "she just sprayed my manuscript out there with no thought of targeting" is also what I might call "submit widely on the first round."

"Evasive about giving submission information" can mean "she wouldn't tell me which editor saw it at which imprint" --and after a former client called editors on their submission list, I'm a whole lot less likely to share that as a matter of course now, myself.

There are two sides to every sundered representation agreement, and both of them are completely true.


To the nub of your question: I think you're not wasting anyone's time if you have a good manuscript and an agent wants to read it.

If you've got concerns about how an agent submits manuscripts, ASK HER.  Don't EVER believe anything anyone else says. Some of the outright lies I've seen on author bulletin boards and discussion groups are flat out actionable, if anyone actually cared about what is said in those places.

Honest to god, some of the backbiting and ugly gossip reminds me of the most recent meeting of the Imperial Storm Troopers Ladies Aid Society.

Query question: agents asking where you're querying

 I have a question about terminology. I received a request for a full along with a detailed synopsis "...and a list of submissions to other agencies or publishers, if any." I wasn't sure if this meant a list of queries sent or just a list of any agencies or publishers who also have the full ms.

It means a list of places that are looking at your manuscript. That's a submission. A query is only a query.


Those kinds of blanket requests bring out my inner curmudgeon too. I'm tempted to say "what the hell business is it of yours?"


On the other hand, if I've read your ms, and liked it, and want to discuss how fabulous I will be for your career, only to discover that other agents have their mitts on the manuscript too; well, then, I DO ask who has it cause if it's Barbara Poelle, I know to deliver a case of vodka to her office to distract her.

Query question: when the call isn't The Call

What are your thoughts on agents who make "the call" but only to gauge the writer's interest in revising, as opposed to offering representation?
Note: This has happened to me twice. I'm beyond frustrated and, quite frankly, a tad insulted that (proverbially speaking) an agent won't put a ring on my finger until they see how I perform in bed. Sounds crude, but it's true :/

My thoughts are, would you like it more if we called with form rejections?

I'm not sure how "the call" came to be the expectation for how agents offered representation, or that the only time an agent calls is to offer representation.

I've called several people at that query stage, and it wasn't to offer representation, it was to straighten out something like missing pages, or screwy manuscript format, or some other lesser matter. I'm really sorry if they were disappointed about the subject of the call, but it's a whole lot easier to do some of this stuff by phone rather than email.


You've set yourself up here. If an agent calls you to discuss revision, it's a whole lot better than a form rejection.
And trust me, finding out if an author is open to revision is one of the key things I'd want to know before offering to take them on as a client.

"The call" is like "happy book birthday"--something invented within the last couple years that has taken on an importance that is not warranted. It's a shorthand used by  authors to talk amongst themselves, but it's not a shorthand used here.  I can't think of a time when I've said "time to make The Call" when I was considering taking on a client. In fact, by the time we get to that point, we've had SEVERAL phone calls.

Try not to see it as an insult. It's an expression of interest. In other words, it's a good thing.


 

Query Question: feedback and junior agents

I have a scenario for your wonderful blog, where the readers comments are as insightful as the posts. Here’s the situation: I’ve been reading awesome agent’s (AA) blog for almost a year now. From time to time AA holds an incredible open query event for her followers, promising to provide a personal reply, even if the query isn’t right up her alley. Suspecting a fatal conceptual flaw in my manuscript, I have intended to submit to this open query event. But, being the neurotic author that I am, I waited, not wanting to blow the opportunity with a manuscript or query that wasn’t up to snuff. I’ve finally gotten my act together, but AA seems to have suspended her open query events. Meanwhile, at AA’s agency there is a new junior agent (JA) seeking in my genre and firing off #MSWL tweeter twits that look they were targeted directly at my manuscript. What’s a neurotic author to do? (1)

There are probably two specific concerns here. First, after we’ve read every bit of advice on your blog, how can we find better specific feedback than the typically vague agent rejection? A few rejections along the lines of “You certainly write great dialog, but I just don’t feel passionate about your main character,” or “I love your concept and writing, but unfortunately I’m not connecting with your story,” are nice but don’t really help. More rejections are just a flat no, or worst of all, a no reply. Your recent post on professional editing services made this approach to getting good feedbacks look like a chancy proposition at best. And my CP, despite her excellent advice on my MS has little insight into what my fatal flaw might be. (2)

The second concern is regarding the wisdom of submitting to junior or new agents. What should we be looking for in a new agent? What should we be looking out for? Is the fact that JA works for a well respected agency with people like AA surrounding her, and presumably guiding and mentoring her recommendation enough? (3)

(1) Hmmm...I wonder who that slacker AA agent is?

And let's all remember that the purpose of Chum Bucket isn't to get feedback alone. It's querying for real. And that's the problem. I've been backed up on requested fulls for more than six months. I request a HUGE percentage of manuscripts during Chum Buckets (often up to 10% of total queries) so if I'm backed up on reading, the last thing I should do is add to the inventory.

I know that's not what you want to hear, but telling people they need to wait for me to read their work in 120, 150, 180!!!! days makes me crazy.

Therefore you should be casting a wider net. Which brings us to

(2) An agent's job is NOT NOT NOT to critique your work. You can get that sometimes from requested fulls, or more likely if you meet an agent at a conference and have her look at your synopsis, with the idea of helping you identify plot holes, or look at your query to identify weaknesses. Short of that, you need to get advice from other sources.

(3) You look for a junior agent who is sitting five feet away from a fierce senior agent who will keep her out of trouble.  You look for an agent who loves your work and thinks she can sell it.  And you make triple dog sure that she isn't heading for the exit anytime soon.

Query question: I have a contract but want an agent for film/translation

 I have recently secured a book contract without an agent for my YA novel with a small press. I retain  the film and foreign rights, which I believe should be left up to an agent. Will having a book contract provide me with more cachet to getting representation, or will my queries still be relegated to the "thanks but no thanks" pile?

First, you were smart to retain the rights your publisher is most likely not able to fully exploit.  

Second, if you're querying for a novel that's already got a contract, your situation is a bit different than most.  You'll want to query for your SECOND book, and mention that you retain the translation and film rights to the first book as well.

Most agents will not take on one book just for translation and film rights.  There simply isn't enough money in it to justify the amount of work.

But, if you secure an agent for the second book, having your sub rights for the first book will be a bonus particularly for film.

 

Conference etiquette: Agents in the wild

When you meet an unagented writer socially (i.e., not because they've scheduled time with you at a conference), do you expect them to talk about their novel? (1) Are you waiting for them to initiate that conversation? (2)  If they keep the conversation casual, are they missing an opportunity to talk about their work to you? (3) In other words, how do YOU like writers to approach you? (4)  Not that you're a benchmark for all agents, but you're the only agent in the room talking at the moment. 

(1) NO.
(2) NO
(3) NO
(4) With whisky and chocolate. Preferably with glasses, and napkins, and enough for the both of us.


I will be at several upcoming conferences*** in the next few months so this is a very timely question.

I fully understand that many people are absolutely tongue tied when meeting an agent in an unexpected spot. If we're alone in the elevator and I'm not just knackered to the point of incoherence, I generally will try to ask a general question like "are you having a good conference?" or "I see you're from Carkoon. Has anyone seen Colin there lately?"

Notice neither of those are about your book. And generally they're things you can answer pretty easily.

If you get off the elevator and kick yourself for "missing your chance" stop kicking. There's no way you can pitch your book in that moment and have me ever want to read it, or want to interact with you further, cause pitching in that moment means you're tone deaf. And by tone deaf, I mean oblivious to the situation you're in and just hell bent on getting what YOU want.  That's NOT a quality I look for in a client. Tenacity and focus are important; knowing how to be around people is equally important.

If you meet an agent in the elevator, you can use those exact same questions to initiate conversation: "Are you having a good conference?"  "I see you're from New York; has the weather warmed up yet?"

General small talk conversational gambits.

THEN, if you want to use that moment to your advantage, you WRITE me a query that says "I met you briefly in the elevator at the Summer Synopsis Camp on Carkoon and we talked about the weather in NYC."

That helps me remember you and reminds me that you are clued in about how to talk to people, and when NOT to push your book.

If someone comes up to me in a social situation and says "Can I pitch you my book" I've always wanted to say "Sure go ahead" and let them ramble on. When they finally stop, I want to say "no, that doesn't seem very well written" so they will huff and puff and say "but you haven't even read it!" to which I can reply "exactly. I need to see the writing. Send me a damn written query."

I've never been able to bring myself to do that in all these years, but man oh man I want to.

What I generally say is "I'd prefer you didn't, but please feel free to send a written query." At least half the time, people start pitching anyway.

I've made other people wear my name tag at parties to avoid this kind of thing. I've hidden behind friends to avoid this kind of thing.

I hate this kind of thing.

I mean seriously hate hate hate it.  The reason is I KNOW I am curt and dismissive and brutal in real life. (Please don't everyone pile on here to deny it; trust me, I'm self-aware.)  I simply can NOT reply in the kindlier way I can on paper.  I try very hard to avoid being put in these situations, but when it's unavoidable the only person who hates this more than you is ME.

My slithery colleague Barbara Poelle is masterful at in-person pitching moments like this. She's forthright without being brutal, and often very helpful. It's the only reason I stand next to her at parties (well, that and she knows the shortest route to the bar.) But even Barbara HATES this kind of in person pitching. (You'd never know it to talk to her, but she does.)
 

On the other hand, if at some point during a conference I do ask about your novel, you know to Be Ready, right?




***
ThrillerFest/CraftFest
Midwest Writers Conference in Muncie Indiana
Writers Digest Pitch Slam
Bouchercon
CrimeBake

Agent protocol question: missed deadlines

Recently, I've noticed quite a few writers talking about the long wait times they encounter with agents they've signed with. I am including myself in this bunch as I am with my second agent (the first one left the industry and we parted on very amicable terms). I like my current agent, but just like the first, she'd say something like, "I'll have notes on your latest MS by the end of the week!" and then a few more weeks will pass by before I actually see the notes. I see a lot of this being reported on AW and on other writing sites.

I get that agents are busy as hell. I myself have a really hectic job, but when we promise our clients a project by "the end of the week", we damn well better have it in the client's inbox by the end of the week, not the end of three weeks. And if we encounter an unforeseen delay, we send the client an e-mail with apologies and a heads-up to let them know we need a new deadline.

Is it ever acceptable to talk to your agent about it and be honest about how you feel with regards to their timing? Is there an okay way of saying, "You don't have to promise to get it to me within the week. You can take all the time you need, but please have it ready when you say it will be ready"? Or should I and my fellow writers just gnaw on our fingers in silence, wondering if this would actually be the week that we get our notes?

Yes, it's entirely acceptable to be straightforward with your agent about what working style suits you. You say it just like you said it to me: "It will help me tremendously if you only tell me something is coming when you know it is. I appreciate that priorities can shift in a day and a week, particularly with things that are important not urgent, but expecting something on Friday then not getting it, or an email saying it's delayed, is very difficult."




You and your agent are on the same team. One of the best ways to have effective communication is to tell the other person what works best for you.


I have had to learn this several times.  It's particularly useful for my minions to know how to act when I am in a towering rage.  Telling them what to do saves a LOT of misunderstanding.  Telling your agent what works for you will do that too.


I think one of the reasons that agents often say nothing rather than check in with "yea, I'm not getting this done" is first they feel guilty for NOT getting it done or they don't like to explain (baldly) that something was more important than your project (my skin crawls just writing that.)

One way you can help build trust is by never saying "well when WILL you get this done; I feel neglected." That can shut down communication really quickly.  I know it shouldn't but lets all realize how things actually work, not how you want them to work.

I know a lot about this problem because it afflicts me even as I write this.  I wish I had a better solution, but I don't...yet.

Rant: So, what exactly do you do, really?

Agent Lovely wants a marketing proposal and I'm confused.
I wrote the book--memoir--already, and that's what Agent Lovely is representing. She's asked me to create basically an entire book proposal minus the chapter summaries and sample chapters. (Thankya Jesus I've spent the last few years building "platform").

But it feels weird. Isn't any of this Agent Lovely's job, or her intern's job? (1)  I'm currently in a residency with Famous Best-Selling Memoirist, and when I asked her(2), FBSM said that sounded weird, that marketing proposals are for when you haven't written the book yet and want to sell based on a sample and platform. FBSM's position is that agents make phone calls and pitch the book based on the writing. (3)

I made the proposal, subtitling it "Let's Market, Bitches," which may be slightly passive-aggressive on my part but also reflects the voice of the manuscript. While making it, I realized it's probably better I did, because I have enough experience writing PR to do a very good job.
Now I'm wondering: I have radio appearances and social media and TV appearances and I write a mean press release, and I'm compiling all of this myself…so am I paying 15% so that someone with connections will make phone calls? (4)

How much of my own work should I be doing here? I was already planning to market as much as I can after (hopefully) selling, do I have to do a big chunk of the selling part, too? Am I just being ungrateful here? Is this all part of the strange new world of No-One-Actually-Knows-What-Sells-Books-Anymore? (5)

Let's start at the beginning.


(1) Is writing a marketing statement your agent's (or sweet mother of god, what the hell are you thinking?) her intern's job?  No, it isn't. It's your job.  You spent a year building platform (good!) and you know which people know about you and how to reach them.. You as much as said so in the next sentence.


Your publisher will know how to reach general book buyers, but if you've got niche interest readers for your book, you'll be the one to know about this.


Your agent's job is to sell the book. Your job is to write it.  Marketing plans are an essential part of the non-fiction pitch even though memoir is sold like a novel (ie finished when pitched)





(2) There are few things that drive me crazier than people asking for advice from folks who are not suited to offer it by virtue of their experience being limited or out of date. Famous Best Selling Memoirist doesn't need a marketing plan  because she is 1. Famous 2. Bestselling. And if her first book was sold more than five years ago, her experience doesn't apply to you.


Nothing has changed more in the last ten years than how books are sold to the general public. Thank you Amazon, thank you meta data, thank you social media.  FINDING your reader is an enormous challenge. Famous Best Selling has already found her readers.


And the fact that she didn't tell you to talk to your agent chaps my fin. But then we all love to be asked for advice it's true.




(3) Famous is an idiot if she thinks that's what agents do. Maybe that's what her agent does. If that's true, she has a bad agent.   A competent agent is going to do a lot more than make phone calls to sell your work. And that's just the start of things.  Negotiate the contract, make sure the editor gets an editorial letter to you on time, monitor the production schedule so you're not looking at the cover six days AFTER it went to the printer. Audit the royalty statements. Explain the royalty statements to you. And that's just the stuff I did Friday.


The fact that often times we DO write the proposal, or pieces of it, does not mean it's our job. It means we're willing to help you do yours. 




(4) You're not paying anything yet. Let's all remember that your agent doesn't see a dime until you do. If you honestly feel like your agent isn't going to be worth the money, do yourself a favor and split now. There is nothing worse than a client who does not value the service provided.  It's like dating someone who thinks going out with you is marginally better than staying home alone and watching Friends on NetFlix.


(5) Yes you are. And you should knock it off. 


Let's review:

1. Your agent will be working with you for your entire career, or the very least the sale and publication of your book. Generally you are NOT going to pay her for the value of her time. You're going to get a bargain by giving her a percentage of what you earn, and only AFTER you see money too.

2. Don't ask for advice or take advice from people who have outdated experience, or a wildly different experience on how things "should be going."

3. Talk to your agent.  If you seriously think she should be writing your book proposal tell her so. If you think you can save money by pitching directly, go right ahead.


If one of my clients had written this question, I'd fire them on the spot. I can't stand working with people who don't value the service I provide, and life is too short to do that any longer than it takes to write a termination letter. There are a LOT of people out there with terrific projects.  If you don't think I'm worth it, they sure as hell do.