Security cam footage caught some shenanigans.
What the hell is going on here?
25 words or fewer.
Post in the comment section.
Take wagers on how long it takes me to post the results (I hang my head in shame)
Yes there's a prize.
No it's not any of these hooligans. Those are my beta readers until I get new interns!
Contest is now closed! (sorry!)
48 comments:
It's very clear...their love is here to stay.
Not for a year...but ever and a day.
In time the book piles may tumble, shark tummies rumble, remoras may grumble...
But their love is here to stay.
It's obvious, Shark & Remora are paying homage to Octo-spider. Who lost his/her/its panda socks. Dang! (I bet remora ate them. Just saying...)
"Quick, before the Alot gets here! I'll hide Shark and you ask about the missing Octo-socks."
“I dunno…Alots are known for superior swimming capabilities...”
I say lets start a nanny-cam Go Fund Me account for Janet.
Regarding contest results...voter fraud. We need a commission to investigate.
They're searching for the results from the last contest.
"Jeff Somers, Hoboken. Got that Shark-for-Brains?"
"Yeah. Hope it’s worth it."
"For three ARCs of WRITING WITHOUT RULES? Believe it! Stephen King, watch yer back!"
Learned today:
Giggling spiders are creepy.
Reading shark isn't Reiding shark. Both read a lot but only one allows Alot to read!
Move. That. Head!
“It’s my turn.”
“Not yet.”
“If you want another drink of the good stuff it is my turn to surf the shark.”
Octo: Commence Operation Interview Facilitation
Alot: Cute Otter picture on wall
Shark: Bottle of premium whiskey
Octo: Cue adorable poses
Shark: Bring on the interns
The spider needed something stiffer than curds after that Miss Muffet ditched him. But the Alot and kitty had sexier ideas. Then shit got weird.
I wager you'll have the results before most of the NFL reports to training camp on Tuesday.
"Quick! You take the top, I've got the bottom."
"She'll never know it's gone."
Or.
Queries will drive anything to drink.
I keep hoping that one day- ONE DAY - we will get a caption contest with a 30 word maximum, so I can do a "my nayme is" poem (I love that meme with an undying passion.) Well, I'm armed with both a splitting headache and a devil-may-care attitude today, so I'm doing it anyway.
Our nayme is plush,
an wen its nite,
an our grate shark
turns off the lite,
we crank some tunes
we know by heart-
We let a Wilde
Rumpus start.
*spray paints "Vive le Revolution" onto the wall and runs cackling into the distance*
As evidenced by security cam footage, lack of interns, and queries current only through 3/20/2017, the beta readers have mutinied, seized the booze, and conquered!
A: That one!
S: No, reject it.
O: I'm the one with the arms, I say we read it.
S: Fine, send the request.
Drunk tweeting:
Octospider: A one-star review? Kill 'em!
Shark: Gonna get my Hello Kitty flamethrower.
Round thing: I love ya, Sharkie!
Shark: It’s true! Cat videos, cat toys, cat treats. Only thing in her Search History!!
Alot: alot alot alot!
Spidey: I need a drink.
If there's something strange in synopsis-hood - Who ya gonna call? Query Busters! Starring Dan Arachnid, Bill Selachimorpha, and Herald Alot.
"A Macallan from Speyside? I've got the Sharque down. Open it! Quick!"
"Who said I'm sharing?"
“What else can we order?”
“Pie.”
“No.”
“Cupcakes?”
“No.”
“Hurry! She’ll be back soon.”
Order completed, the trio assumed poses of nonchalance.
Straws arriving soon.
“Piggyback ride. Yee. Faster!”
“Quit scratching me or I’ll crown you.”
“I want to ride piggyback.”
“Not until you put on your Panda booties, Spide.”
After boosting Aragog to high ground, the others called up. “Any sign? We can’t start drinking without him.”
“Nope, still no Alot. Check the bathroom!”
"My fellow Carkoonians, it's time to make Janet's desk great again!"
"Hold still, Sharkie, I'm goin' up. I'm not putting up with THIS nonsense!"
Janet, a picture is worth a thousand words...or at least 25...
My comment is in your email because I can't attach a photo to these comments.
-KateH
"Take me, you beast!"
"Not so rough!"
"What the hell? I thought this was a literary agency, not The Lifestyles of the Sick and Stuffed."
"when the phone rang, they all froze; who was going to be query shark this time?!"
Drunk on fine $200 a bottle 18 year-old Scotch, a stewed spider contemplates a vertical assault on the hard-working Royal feline and her diminutive attendant.
"Well, the prize would be better if she didn't have to drink the Scotch first."
"Open the box"
"I prefer the 12-year old, myself."
"Have you seen the size of the TBR pile? Stick with the 18."
"Open it, already..."
Spidopus surreptitiously started her video camera, envisioning a YouTube Interspecies Porn Channel and the megabucks it would generate. But apparently the Shark just needed hugs.
Come on, guys. Stop staring at that screen. My legs have atrophied, Sharky's eyes are about to burst, and Alot doesn't even have eyes anymore.
"Sean Spider's out. Let's move in."
We're gonna need a bigger slush pile. The spider is out of reach and has all the booze, and you're flat.
Not my fault. I tried to cross the street in NYC.
We must reach the spider.
Build that slush pile. Unlock the Cells of
Carkoon
While the agents are away, the agency’s critters will play.
Today: a whisky-inspired game of King of the Hill.
Spiderina still hasn't quite got the hang of playing hopScotch.
"So THIS is why she told us to not read fan fiction online unsupervised!"
Missed Connections: You were a leggy 18 year old with a killer smile and alot of charm. Pity I only heard your voice.
"Okay, send full requests to all her queries then we'll drink all the scotch. It'll be hilarious!"
"This one’s about an agent who solves crime with her plucky band of 'stuffed' animals. Request?"
"Too close to the truth."
"Yeah."
Moments before finding out why you never play spin the bottle with a spider.
I can't think up a caption. I'm thoroughly diverted and dumbstruck by the condition of that laptop. What the hell did you do to it?
So, a guppy, a little, and a one-legged cyclops sipping apple juice walk into the QOTKU's office...
Another late night.
Janet: happily typing away when li'l Stuffty Demon touches her shoulder.
Egads! Her teeth soften, heart expanding into cuddle-fluff. "Spoctopus, you traitorrrrr--mph!"
Bug-eyed fish prince and side kick are googling how to do the macarena while tarantula dances, but gets confused because he has too many arms. :(
Though the single malt was as advertised, Eric was a little less certain about the selectivity of his "Arachnid Only Mixer"
"Quick, let's post a blog contest, she'll never notice."
"You said that when we confiscated the booze."
"Yeah, and?"
"Smile, you're on candid camera."
Shark: Just a notch higher.
Alot: Almost there.
Spider: Holy crotch! Box is empty.
Shark: Janet out-Scotched us.
Alot: Unbelievable.
Spider: Drinking plan is botched.
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