The winner of all of 2017!

I was very hesitant about offering up the planner as a prize cause it felt a bit pedestrian, but I was glad to see there were indeed some folks who both wanted it and could use it!

While this is the last of the giveaways there WILL be content on the blog for the rest of the holiday season. I figure the August hiatus was enough vacation for any of us!

And for those of you regulars who know

Amy Schaefer (12/21/16)

I only have internet access about once every 48 hours, so I'll miss tomorrow's giveaway, too. But I need to share this with you all.

We are in the midst of moving out of Paradise and back home after six years.
We're having terrible issues trying to send our stuff home.
It is very likely that I am going to have to leave ALL of my books on the boat.
All of them.
All.
And did I mention I won't make it home in time for Christmas with my kids, whom I haven't seen in a month?

Okay, I'm done bringing down the mood. Friendly waves all around.

It's one thing to leave all your books behind by choice (as I did when I moved to NYC) but to leave them unwillingly…that's really hard. Let's all send some good vibes in her direction.


And now to today's entries, or comments, or both:

Susan just cracked me up here:

Hi.*





*Trying my hand at brevity. ;)

And Kitty's story of her thrifty grandmama (recycling thread!) and the new garbage pail!

As kind of a joke present for her 90th birthday, my uncles gave her a new garbage pail to replace the one that leaked. She said it was her favorite present and asked me to take her picture with it. She said she had had the old one for 45 years and thought it should have lasted longer.

I think I would have really liked her!

Lisa Bodenheim asked:

And now, O Sharkly One, what is the 1,000 page book you'll be reading? Curious hamster minds want to know.

The Power Broker by Robert Caro.


There's clearly something wrong with me because Megan V's comment cracked me up:

No planner necessary, I have no plans. 2017 will just have to do what every other year before it has done. Hit me with a bus.

I'm just hoping it's metaphorical.

Lennon Faris cracked me up too:

Colin - If you simply change your residency to another planet, you can be whatever age you damn well please.

At least, that's my plan. Currently I think I'm a Martian teenager. Or if I switch to Jupiter, maybe I'll be younger than my kids.

OK, time to turn on a normal facade again. Sorry folks.

Nate Wilson's comment made me laugh:

I have no need for such a planner.
I don't plan; I scheme.

But these two guys just laid me flat out with laughter:

Timothy Lowe

This week has been a testament to a shark's generosity. If anything stranger has happened in 2016, I'll be a monkey's uncle.

(Frain - quit writing your flash fiction about my extended family!)

Thanks Janet - I will echo others when I say this is not a bid for your prize. This blog is the prize.

Happy New Year all!

John Davis Frain

Lowe, I question your use of "extended," but I'll continue to keep quiet about what I know. Nice carton of cigs from your brother last Sunday, by the way. Hint, hint.

No, your other brother.

And the contest would not be complete without a gem from yesterday's winner, Steve Forti

O.T.T.D.O.C., my agent gave to me:
Twelve drafts of edits
Eleven query batches
Ten months of waiting
Nine rejection letters
Eight more submissions
Seven months of rewrites
Six fulls requested
Five new prompt words!
Four editors bidding
Three offers made
Two book deal
And John Frain’s manuscript under the tree

I really liked Gigi Kern's entry because I love the idea of helping her stick to her goals:

I know that if I had your calendar it would inspire me to stick to my writing goals. Deadlines are the little deaths that suck the life from me. But with your calendar, the light of snarky goodness overpower all that doom and gloom. Writing here I come!

As did Margaret Turkevich's

I'm an organizational mess. Your weekly planner, with its implied Shark stare on every page, would motivate me during a complete revision of my debut novel, Curtains for the Corpse.

And Amy Johnson's was fabulous:

A datebook touched by her own fins
Would mean the world to me.
Every day, the whole year through,
I’d take a glance with glee.

Her sharkly inspiration
Would permeate each page.
At last I’d leap off this mousey wheel
And break out of this cage.

And then came dear Donnaeve's plaintive wail:

Me! Please? With cherries on top?

“Why?” the Shark asks?

I always give hubby this exact thing as a stocking stuffer. The stuffing part is questionable - but I do give him one. This is like karma, because THIS year, I waited too long, and NOW I can't find one.

HELP!

But of course the problem is, it would not get there in time for Christmas.


And then the front runner took herself out of the running:

Amy Johnson

Of course I'm not sure if my little poem is anywhere close to being in contention, but after reading about Donna's icky, sticky pickle, I'd say no thanks in hopes that Donna's husband gets the datebook he's been used to getting each year.

Then Sharyn Ekbergh gave me a lovely idea here:

I think what I would do with this is choose someone who is planning on finishing a book in 2017. Not necessarily me.

My favorite line to start off with, (it may be from John Truby but I'm not sure) is,
"Will writing this book change your life?"

I like the way the line does not say "Will selling this book change your life?" The focus is on the writing of it.
Then I would scatter some inspirations and goals through the book and end in December 2017 with

"Query widely."

but of course, at 88 words, had to be disqualified.


And Scott G just cracked me up with this one:

In 2016, I was late for a procrastinator's convention. The very one I helped organize the year before. We'll have a convention in 2017, I'm sure. We'll use the same theme we had scheduled for this year: "Procrastinators Unite Tomorrow!" Which has been our theme for the past few years, but we've never been able to use it. In fact, it's been our theme since we started thinking about organizing a convention, which we've never had, but I'm sure we'll have one next year, if we start organizing now, which we'll start doing tomorrow, if I could only mark it in my planner, which I don't have.

but it too suffered from serious over word count.


So there were two contenders remaining: Margaret and Gigi. I had to call in assistance to decide. Of course, Her Grace, The Duchess of Yowl was willing to take a look.

She had a different idea of what the prize should be  and she's not all that fond of curtains.


Her choice, and the winner is Gigi Kern! 

Thanks to all of you who entered, and commented, or both.
And the holiday greetings really pepped up the day (mostly spent filing, blech!)

Yes there will be posts in the coming days, but I won't be answering questions till the start of the year. You're welcome to send them in now of course.

And as we all are out and about in the coming days, full of holiday cheer, let's remember the folks who work in jobs that require them to be there on Christmas, not at home. Call center operators, police, firefighters, convenience store clerks, hotel staff, and my personal point of reference: church musicians.