Week in Review August 9

It's nice to be back on track after a couple weeks of being away and feeling very untethered by too much to do.

Last week's review wasn't really more than a hodge podge of quick notes from the Writers Digest conference but as usual, the best part of any blog post is found in the comments.

I just loved this news from bjmuntain:

I'd been going to give a whole bunch of travel tips I learned on this trip here, but there's really only one that's important. Edmonton, Alberta, airport has stress relief dogs. They wear vests that say Pet Me and go from gate to gate to let guests get some loving and wet faces.

I never thought I needed to go to Edmonton Alberta, but now I do. And I guess I should quit teasing our neighbors to the north in Canadia. Any country that can come up with this idea should be off limits to teasing.

I'm on a typo kick this week after having DIFFRNT in large letters on the overhead screen at the conference.

Some of you are sharing my pain:

Kregger: And listen to god old rock and roll while doing it.

The fact that there is something called Armadillo con just makes me happy:

Jenz: "but I did go to ArmadilloCon last weekend"

And I think this one wins for both good intentions and "holy moly what are you doing"

Janice Grinyer: 

Packing for Bismarck North Dakota so I can finish my book in my daughter's basement apt. while she works during the day. I am holding myself hostage until I rework this one damn chapter that holds me back from completing the damn thing. I must be getting close because I am annoyed with it and it with me and whoever survives the week in Bismarck wins.

I really liked kdjames Sunday ruminations:

wondered what anthropologists or explorers will make of our language and customs one day in the far distant future when language has changed yet again. Will they discover our flash fiction entries and ascribe them to religion? Will they try to decipher the meaning of the favoured words, repeated over and over, and see them as an offering to appease a powerful demi-god? Will they dismiss the idea of word-play as being too advanced a concept for our inferior and under-developed species?

I used that metaphor a while back to explain why non-fiction book proposals needed to cover the significance of the book being proposed.

On Monday we learned the results of Amy's Agent FlashFiction Contest

The entries are getting better each time and that means it's getting harder and hard to pick finalists and a winner. I think this is all some sort of vast conspiracy, probably hatched on Carkoon, for revenge on The Agent. (and I'm ok with that, having gnawed more than my fair share of writers in the last few years)

I really liked hearing why you all enter the contests, and the individual goals you set for yourselves.

Dena Pawling started a very interesting discussion with her comments about not getting subtext in a story:

When I was in high school, my Sophomore English class was the typical “read and analyze the classics”. The first book we were assigned was Animal Farm. I read it. Twice. It was about a bunch of farm animals, and the pigs were not very nice. That's all I got out of it, even after the class discussion.

bjmuntain added

I have to admit, I didn't get Colin's ending, until Janet pointed it out. Sometimes subtlety is lost on me, I'm afraid. Once I saw it, I thought 'oh yeah', even though Janet didn't say what it was.

And Theresa:

And I always struggled with the "meaning" in novels. I once asked my 8th grade English teacher if she was sure that every story had a particular meaning. What if the author had simply wanted to tell a story? That teacher didn't like me very much.

Colin Smith

I've read that C.S. Lewis was annoyed by people who referred to the Narnia stories as "Christian Allegory." Now, it would be absurd to deny that the series is based in a Christian worldview, and leans heavily on Christian themes and biblical allusions. However, C.S. Lewis wanted the Narnia books to be regarded FIRST and FOREMOST as "good stories." And I agree with this perspective. It's cool if you can pack some deep and significant symbolism and allegory into a novel. But if the story sucks and I can't connect with the characters , then what's the point? I'm probably going to give up reading it, and all your cleverness will be lost on me.

And of course Julie M. Weathers summed it all up to perfection:

I have to agree with you. Someone years ago on the forum pointed out how much they appreciated the symbolism of whatever in my story. That never occurred to me whatsoever. I was describing something on the family farm exactly as I remember it. It didn't represent anything except a typical Montana farm.

    Gads, don't ever accuse me of being literary or deep.

    It's like an intellectual having a discussion with a cowboy who's staring at something on the ground.

    "I see you're pondering life. How that fragile flower can break through that rock to find it's way, reaching upwards to the sun. Triumphant against all odds!"

    "Hmmm? Oh, no. I was just looking at that dry cow pie and wondering where my fence was down. Not supposed to be any cows in this section."

    Yep, that would be pondering the cow pie of Julie Weathers literature. We all have our place in the sun. Some of us just have a kind of flat green place.

And Colin asked: Janet: What do you mean by "not quite a story"?

It has a start and a finish, and something changes. Maybe it's our (the reader's) perception or maybe it's something to do with one of the characters in the story. 

And Colin also asked:

Janet: Do you have any objection to the contests being announced and discussed on Twitter? I know you've said we are not to Tweet you directly and say "Hey, Shark-for-Brains, look at my awesome story!" What are the parameters for Twitter discussion of contests? Are there any? Or, like Chum Bucket, would you prefer to keep the contests for regular blog readers?

I don't have any objection to touting the contests far and wide. Just do NOT include me if you do it on Twitter or Facebook. (ie don't link me, or include @Janet_Reid in the tweet.) Link only to the actual contest on the blog.

And there's been idle chat about doing a Facebook page of some sort for the reader of this blog. I can't control what any of you do (even here on this blog, other than delete comments) but I STRONGLY urge you not to do this.

For starters, none of you have time for that. You should all be busy writing.

Second, starting a group from scratch is time-intensive. If you need a critique group, find a place that's already set up to help you form one.

And finally, under No Circumstances is anyone allowed to attach my name to that kind of effort in ANY way. I have to be very careful about  the perception that something has my OK particularly if it involves critiques of any kind, or information about publishing. And since no one is all that interested in my opinion on anything BUT those items, it's better to just say no and be done with it.

I'm sorry to be such a bucket of cold water on an idea birthed only of good intentions but I've learned the very hard way to be cautious about this kind of thing.

On Tuesday, the question was what to do with a train wreck of a novel when the reviewer was also a novelist

The key piece of information was the reviewer felt some of the book had been plagiarized, which of course meant the reviewer must decline to review it.

Lisa Bodenheim asked a good question after seeing the book in question had such egregious errors:

I had assumed big publishers still had copy editors who review books before publishing them. After all, it is the publisher's name on the book too so it reflects on their professionalism.

So this is a good question to ask on the road to publication. Do I ask my agent (when I got one) or my publisher (when one is found)?

Nothing goes out of my office with that level of error. I'd be mortified to submit something like that to a publisher..  Most publishers I work with do have copy editors, and they make my purse-lipped, eagle eyed nose for errors (and adjective strings) look like a day in Slackerville.

That said, some smaller publishers do not have resources for a top flight copy editor. If you know that's the case, it's entirely reasonable to retain the services of a copy editor yourself.  Not all copy editors are created equal, and I've heard some stories that would curl your hair, so as always, get references and check them before retaining anyone to do work for you.

donnaeve asked: "do reviewers HAVE to review books"

No. No one is obliged to review a book even if you got one on a Goodreads give away with the presumption you'd post a fair review.  Certainly that would not be the time to say "I don't have time to review this." You'd need a more substantive reason. The question poser did have one though: plagiarism.

You simply can not review a book that you believe is plagiarized. You also do not want to post a review saying "this book is plagiarized" unless you've done the page by page comparison needed to substantiate the claim.  Your obligation is only to write to the publisher about your concern and say you will not be reviewing the book. What the publisher does with that information is their business. You do NOT want to be in the position of making statements about a book in a public forum that can lead to a lawsuit. Publishing your opinion about the writing of the book is one thing; saying "this writer stole material from someone else" is quite another.

Her Grace the Duchess of Kneale  posted my new favorite sardonic phrase: diversity bingo cards in their books.

And I had to laugh that it wasn't until the very last comment THREE DAYS LATER that someone pointed out there were two points labelled #6.  Either you didn't notice, or you didn't want to say anything.

I'm totally fine with readers pointing out those kinds of errors. I like to fix them.

And if you want a comment deleted, it's ok to write to me and tell me to delete it for you. I'll only need your posting name, date, and timestamp.

I like to keep the blog tidy. That means deleting the "this comment removed by author" dead spots and fixing errors no matter when they are found.

After a terrible Google mess, I'm still trying to update all the posts that have missing images.  I fear I'll be working on that until the cows (or Colin) come home.

On Wednesday the topic was republishing short stories:

and of course Colin is determined to take up permanent residence on Carkoon with this little gem:

So--how about an anthology of, oh, say, flash fiction stories previously published on a certain literary agent's blog? I'm curious to know what the interest would be in that, if Janet knows of any publishers that would take such a project on, or would this be better as a self-published project?

For starters, no one can self-publish those stories since there are multiple authors. Each author retains copyright of his/her work even if it's posted here. Unless you mean self-pubbing only your own entries.

Second, no publisher is going to be interested in something like this given that all the material is already available at no cost here on the blog. 

If by some twist of fate, I am struck by lightning, killed, then revived as a crazy person who thought this was a good idea, there would need to be fresh new material-- essentially bonus content --for a book to have any chance of  finding a paying market.

Craig brought up the sticky issue of rights:

Make sure that the rights really do revert. Places like Short Story America don't do much of a contract because it is implied that they own the rights forever. Some of the more interesting anthologies have a sliding scale of reversion. If you are a headlining writer you can keep the rights. If you are a filler writer they keep the rights. It has to do with sales generation versus opportunity.

I can not agree with this more. Short story contracts particularly from small presses are often a hodgepodge nightmare. Make sure there is either the phrase "non-exclusive" or a a specific amount of time for the exclusivity.

Example: Author grants Publisher the non-exclusive right to print, publish and sell the Poem  "Ode to Kale"  in the English language throughout the world
OR

Author grants Publisher the exclusive right print, publish and sell the Poem "Ode to Kale" for twelve (12) months, and the non-exclusive right to print, publish and sell Poem thereafter, in the English language throughout the world.

And in case anyone has forgotten, yes there is an Ode to Kale.

ODE TO KALE

Leafy green and verdant plant
Whose charms my taste buds tease
Though food of pleasure here is scant
Your bitter juice doth please

Now this exile land is home
And here my days will end
I'm glad to know your wavy comb
My succulent best friend.

---Colin (The Man of Great Ideas) Smith

and it turns out that Christina Seine's pint size person has a great idea:

8yo: No! Yeah! They could put all the agents in tanks and then you could pitch to them that way! Instead of aiming at them, you could just aim at the target thing, and if you hit it but they don't like your book, they go in the water.

Honest to godiva, if we did that as a fundraiser at Bouchercon, we'd clean up. Well, someone would clean up. I doubt they'd let me keep the lovely lolly proceeds.

Christina Seine harked back to my presentation at the Writers Digest conference wherein I spelled different without the second e:

I meant to tell you Janet that you were eclipsed by another presenter during the conference whose slide was supposed to say "hands." So when we all read that a character had her hans on her hips, a general giggle rippled through the audience. It was followed by several Norwegian-themed erotically funny whispered one-liners that had the attendees in the middle rows doubling over with silent laughter. I had tears rolling down my cheeks.

Sven and Lena jokes? Oh dear, I know only one. It's utterly disreputable and can not be printed on this blog. However. Should we have a Welcome Back From Carkoon gathering at Bouchercon for our exiled Colin Smith, someone remind me to tell you the story of the fellow who pitched me a marriage tips book at a conference one year. (This story is why Barbara Poelle got an air horn for Christmas that year)

And in case you need a discussion on breakfast cereal, this was the comment trail for you.

On Thursday we talked about waiting time for following up on requested fulls.

[There were 177 comments by week's end, which I think is the record now. Fortunately for me, at least 2/3 of them were far afield of the day's topic, thus hilarious but not requiring follow up.]

Jennifer R. Donohue asked a good question:

I'm unclear as to how I ought to word it, though. "Dear Agent, emailing to check the status on the full of TITLE sent DATE. Kisses, have a good summer!" (maybe not with kisses. too early in the possibility of a relationship).

Here's how you email for a follow up:

Subject line: Follow up on TITLE by AUTHOR requested DATE

Dear Snookums,

I'm writing to follow up on TITLE which you requested on DATE.

Option A: I wanted to make sure you received it in good order. Yours truly, Woodland Creature

Option B: Please let me know if any further information will be helpful to you. Yours truly, WC

You use Option A if the agent did not acknowledge receipt of the full

You use Option B if the agent DID acknowledge receipt of the full.

Notice that in neither option do you ask how soon the agent will reply to you. The purpose of this is not to get a date certain, but to make sure the communication pipes are running clearly.

When I reply to acknowledge receipt of requested fulls I tell writers to expect me to take 90 days but they are welcome to touch base as often as their nerves require. You might think that anxious

woodland creatures would email me every day but no only do they NOT, it's cut down on actual follow up emails. Interesting isn't it that telling people it's ok to be in touch salves their anxiety enough that they don't have to.

I can't figure out why more agents don't do this.

Laura Mary had a good question:

I know that some agents are 'no reply means no' at the query stage, which is annoying but I guess understandable - what is the etiquette form an Agent's perspective with partials/full requests? I naively assume that that would warrant a reply, even if it is a 'not for me' 12 months later.

I believe that agents should reply to partials and fulls. Most agents I know say that is their practice, even if they've gone over to the Dark Side on "no response means no."

What happens is they get woefully behind, and it's kind of embarrassing, not to say humiliating to keep writing back with "not yet." I think that's why there is the Great Silence sometimes. Or, they mean to read it this week, and things get out of hand, and then the email gets buried, and pretty soon it's three weeks old and starting to smell like ripe gym sox, and it's just easier to delete it and pretend you never saw it.

I liked kaitlyn sage's imagery here:

I tend to view my partials and fulls as little unicorns I put out to graze and get fat on the lush grass of being read by strangers. Maybe they come when I call to check on them, maybe they don't. They're unicorns. Suckers have minds of their own.

And Lizzie makes a good point:

I wish it was more professionally acceptable for agents to post status updates on fulls even if they are a year or more behind. The waiting is a bummer, sure, but it's the daily today-could-be-the-day suspense that niggles.

The problem with that is I don't always read in date order. In fact, I read out of order a lot. I do my queries in chrono order, but short of actually posting names or titles, I can't think of a way to keep up on the status of requested fulls.  

On Friday we paused to compose entries for the flash fiction writing contest. The results for that will be posted on Monday.

Bouchercon:

Colin Smith

And if I might just say something else about Bouchercon (and then I'll shut up about it--unless you all carry on talking about it...), I'm actually looking forward to the fact that this is, essentially, a fan event. It's not a writing conference, so I'm not going to be there trying to get published, and agents are not going to be there trying to build their client lists. This means we can all relax and have fun, which is a much better way to get to know people. That's not to say I don't want to go to a writing conference. Heck yes I do. But this sounds to me like a much better atmosphere in which to meet the likes of Janet, Barbara, and Jessica for the first time. Especially given my relatively inept social skills. :)

A note about Bouchercon. It's in Raleigh North Carolina October 8-11. As Colin mentions it's a fan convention, NOT a writing conference. I go to support my authors. That means I attend their panels.  If you want to find me, that's the first place to look.

Second, I'm in the bar A LOT. And not sozzled either (mostly) It's just a convenient place to hang out.

I'm very much looking forward to seeing blog readers there as well. 

Here are some tips for you:

1. If I'm talking to one person, intently, it's most likely a meeting. Please save your hello for when I can buy you a beverage and have an actual visit.

2. If I'm in the middle of a bunch of people, please feel free to join in. Even if it's all clients or colleagues, we're happy to include you.

3. If I'm sitting alone in the back of the room at a panel, please feel free to talk to me. Even if I'm reading. I tend to get to panels early and stake out my claim to the back of the room.

4. If you see Loretta Ross, say hi. She's a client of mine, and this is her first Bouchercon. She's one of the nicest, funniest people in the world.

5. Under no circumstances will you initiate a conversation about your query or manuscript. This is a convention for READERS and I'm there as a reader not an agent.

Fire away with any questions about B/con.

And a heads up that it's almost vacation time again. I'm not sure what to do for that week+ here on the blog. Here are some ideas:

We can have blog posts with pets again

OR I can do reposts of earlier topics (like all the Rules for Writers)

OR we can just go dark

OR ??? your suggestions appreciated. (Except for Colin. He just gets in to trouble with those)

Subheader choices for the week.

"And then the cat yakked up a hairball."--kdjames

"The thread here is like a stream of consciousness interrupted each day by a post from Janet."-Colin Smith

"Topic? What topic?"--kdjames

"One of the many reasons I love this blog is that Janet understands exactly how batshit crazy we writers are and seems to like us in spite of it." --kdjames

"The first thing on my to do list everyday is read this blog. Worrying about things I can't control is #2.

Unless I wake up super early. Then the order is reversed."--SiSi

kaitlyn sage:
I tend to view my partials and fulls as little unicorns I put out to graze and get fat on the lush grass of being read by strangers.