Wednesday, September 20, 2017

Vacation post day 7/7: The Duchess of Yowl is not amused

DoY: What are you doing? Don't stop petting me!

Me: I have to get back to work your grace.

DoY: You are required to pet me for a full hour every morning and every evening. It's in the contract.

Me: Contract??

DoY: The hospitality contract you had to sign before I agreed to slum it over here in Brooklyn.

Me: I haven't seen, let alone signed, any such thing!

DoY: I signed for you. You were busy hefting my luggage up those stairs.

Me: Were you a loan shark in one of your previous lives?

DoY: Don't try to change the subject. Pet me.

Me: Alright your grace, I will pet you vigorishly.

DoY: We are not amused.

Me: You are however, a muse.

DoY: I need a no-pun rider to that contract.

Me: Fur sure.

DoY: Get Scheister on the phone at once! This is punative!

Me: Is he with the firm of Dewey Cheatham and Howe?

DoY: (leaps to floor, runs to cat blanket cave) Not even petting is worth this torture.

20 comments:

Amy Johnson said...

Vigorishly! Bahaha. I thought, Nah, she wouldn't make that typo. She's up to something. Then I looked up "vigorish." So clever. Thanks for the laughs, Janet! Hope you're having a great vacation.

dellcartoons said...

Sorry,Janet, but I decided I want the Duchess to be my new agent. Her contract skills are amazing, her manipulation skills legendary, and even a shark can't match her ruthlessness.

kathy joyce said...

What a catastrophy! There's a feline between malkintents and puns. A punner is a cheetah without the cougarage to puss a real joke. I'm not lion, it's a kitty bad tom to pun. I vote, "tiger up and mouser away."

E.M. Goldsmith said...

Oh dear. I worry the duchess will not allow the Queen to return to work unscathed. That's cats for you.

My pug tells me we are not allowing any cats to live anywhere near us. She fears a demanding cat might interfere with her naps.

french sojourn said...


Sounds like someone needs one of those glamour photo sessions for this month's issue of Cat Fancy. (I don't think I've ever glanced at one of those magazines, however to me the name is a howl. (As opposed to a catterwaul ))

cheers

Brigid said...

Come now, the Duchess is right. You've gone a whisker over the line. Or, the feline.

Amy Johnson said...

I'm cracking up reading these comments. Kathy, you serious punster! Each time I read your comment, I notice something I missed the last time. Seems this is going to be an especially fun day on The Reef!

Amy Johnson said...

*"Punster" meant in the most complimentary way :)

Melanie Sue Bowles said...

I stink at puns... I'm the unpuniest person on the planet. But I appreciate them. The "fur sure" cracked me up.

You could always send Her Grace to the sanctuary. A few days of roughing it in the barn along with some hard work might adjust her cattitude.

Thanks for the laughs, Janet!

Colin Smith said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Colin Smith said...

Clearly DoY knows contracts, claws by claws...

Fun stuff, Janet! I hope you have a great first day back at work tomorrow! :)

Sherry Howard said...

You've managed to keep us thoroughly entertained on your vacation! Or, rather, the Duchess has kept us entertained. I'm sure her contract requires that thanks go to her!

kathy joyce said...

Amy, I wouldn't think to take "punster" any other way! My dad loved puns. He drove us crazy with them. Now I do the same "for" my kids (and others occasionally). Melanie, cattitude! You got it girl!

Joseph Snoe said...

You're having fun with this now.

Carolynnwith2Ns said...

I made my own personal blanket cave.
Mmm...
Have a nice day
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

Craig F said...

Really? A vacation in Brooklyn? I have to take the side of the Duchess on that one. I will admit that I have spent vacations at home but they ended up with things like playing with oobleck.

There are so many things to do in New York, get out and do some. The day is still young. Or play with some oobleck.

Lucy Crowe said...

The Dark Lord Gothika, aka KittyBoy, sends sympathies to the Duchess. Human pets are at their peskiest when they're attempting humor!

kdjames.com said...

Better to be "not amused" than to be an amuse-bouche, n'est-ce pas?


Janet, I hope you've enjoyed your short vacation as much as we have, reading these posts. Thanks for indulging us with the delightful entertainment.

Ray Rhamey said...

Sounds like a purrrectly terrific vacation at home with her highness. Thanks for the smiles from a fellow kitty-cat fan.

Sherry Howard said...

Hey, Ray Rhamey! I was just going to recommend your book to someone! It's still my go-to for show-don't tell!