DoY: Waitress! (eternal silence echoes for 1/4 second) WAITRESSSSSS!
Me: (off stage) Do you mean me?
DoY: Yes, you. Come help me.
Me: (off stage) You could try calling my name.
DoY: WAITRESSTHUMBS!!! Come help me.
Me: (entering living room, finding DoY on top of bookcase) How the hell did you get up there?
DoY: the ladder of course (eyeroll)
Me: (befuddled) what ladder?
DoY: (uses flick of tail to point disdainfully at curtains, now indeed "laddered", on window)
Me: Those are curtains! 100% silk, hand hemmed, custom made curtains!
DoY: never mind that get me DOWN!
Me: Your Grace, I can't actually reach the top of the bookcase.
DoY: It is rather dusty up here. I thought that whole sloth thing was a metaphor.
Me: If you jump down, I'll catch you.
DoY: I don't believe you.
*sound of front door buzzer*
Me: ok, wait a minute, the delivery guy is here.
DoY: what are we getting?
DoY: (springs from bookcase, sticks the four point landing on the couch, sashays to door) Dibs on the tuna roll!