Get Well Soon Writing Contest

One of the blog readers has been laid up for four weeks+ with a "temporary and not too serious" illness and just happened to mention that last week's contest "provided some great entertainment!"

That sounds like a darn good reason to have another contest this weekend.

Usual rules:

Write a story using 100 words or fewer.

The story should contain these words:

evil
virus
mono
blush
piper

The whole word must appear le in the story. It can be part of a larger word but not divided: monopoly but not Mon Oncle Henri'. Proper names are fine, but you should be aware that using the prompts as proper names is viewed as slacking off by the beady-eyed malcontent who judges these little bouts of blood sport.


Post the story in the comments section of THIS blog post.
If you need a mulligan, a do-over, delete the comment and repost.

Don't post anything but entries: no comments, no kudos, no questions, no opinions. Those
get deleted. 

ONE entry per reader.
International entries are allowed but the prize might change if we have to order from Book Depot.

Contest will open today June 27 at 9pm (Eastern Shark time)
and run for 24 hours.

Contest closes Saturday June 28 at 9pm.

Don't wait till the last minute in case you have problems posting!

If you have questions, tweet to me @Janet_Reid


Ready!
Set!
NOT YET! Contest opens Friday at 9pm. 
ENTER! 
ohhh...too late! Contest closed at 9pm Saturday 6/28.

Query Question: talking about your ex-agent

Dear Selachimorpha Maximus (1),

Two years ago I accepted an offer of representation from a well-established NYC agency. I had recently made the final 10 in my category for the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award, out of something like 10,000 total entries. Fun and surprising times.

After working with the agent for about 9 months, we realized we were on two different paths with the manuscript. I was writing historical fiction; he was hoping to shape it into a genre thriller. In itself this wouldn't have been a problem. I enjoyed trying a different style. But when an editor friend at BigAss Publisher pointed out that this agent was suing a former client, and that they hadn't sold anything in a couple of years since the lawsuit, I decided to look for representation elsewhere.

I first terminated my existing representation agreement, then plunged into the querying process again. (Worth noting that I parted with my former agent on great terms and he left the door open for me. Quite classy.) Fast-forward to the present. I've got a second manuscript now and I've been fortunate to have requests for the series.

At what point, if ever, should I share the details of my previous agency relationship? I can't help but wonder if agents talk about prospective clients, and if so, I suppose I'd want to control the message about why I left my previous agency.

Well, sure we talk about prospective clients all the time. In the office, to our colleagues. But if you mean do I call up Her Slitheriness Barbara Poelle to dish the dirt on prospective clients, the answer is no. For starters, Barbara is the most discrete discreet (oops) person in publishing and if a client's hair were on fire, she'd have gotten the extinguisher out, called 911, wrapped up an auction and called for a hairstyle consult without mentioning a word of it to anyone, even if she was on the phone to me whilst this
was happening.

Mostly what I talk about with other agents are the problems we're all dealing with. Queriers are not problems generally.

The ONLY time I will ask another agent about a prospective client is if there are red flags. Red flags are things like: six agents in six years for six books.  Red flags are: "my agent dropped the ball" or "didn't understand me."  Even then it's just to check that my cautionary feelings are correct. A consult, so to speak.


Here's how you query when you have parted from your former agent:  You query the new project and in the query you say "I was previously represented by Harry Hirsute, but have since parted amicably. The book was not sent on submission."


We can read between the lines on that.


And rest assured that this happens a lot more than you think.  I've got at least six or seven clients who had agents before they came to me. Some of them were pretty good agents too.












(1) Yea, I had to look that one up, too.

Query question: commission structure

I checked your blog to see if you had already answered this question, but I didn't see it there. I was wondering about the rationale for the difference between agent commissions for domestic vs foreign licensing or sales. I've typically seen 15% domestic, 20% foreign. That's standard, yes?

I'm sure there's a perfectly rational reason (or even a few reasons) for that difference. I'm just curious to know what it is. I'm not in the agenting biz, so what might be obvious to an agent, isn't obvious to me. I'm not even sure if I've used the correct terminology here, but I know you're smart and very likely to get what I'm asking.

Related to that, as a writer in the USA, it would seem I'd put myself at somewhat of a financial disadvantage by querying agencies abroad (I've queried some in the UK and Canada), though a couple did have associates or partner agents in the states. I'm curious about how the presence or absence of some kind of partner agent in the US might help or hurt me in the long run with regard to a foreign agency's commission. Do they have US partners in order to get around this issue, and encourage foreign writers to approach them?

Yes, that's standard: 15% domestic, 20% foreign. Here's how that works: when I sell your ms to a US publisher, I get 15% commission. THEN, when I trot your manuscript out overseas, my co-agent in CloudCukooLand gets 10% and I get 10% (total 20%) on the deal.


If I sell your manuscript to a UK publisher first, and directly, (ie not using a UK co-agent) I take 15%. Subsequent sales in around the world for translation deals are 10% me, 10% co-agent.


It's the presence of the co-agent that bumps the commission to 20%.


If you query agents in the UK you'll still pay 15% (I believe that's the standard there as well) on deals that don't rquire a co-agent. Most UK agents who sell in the US market do so directly.

Query question: character names for M, Alex

 I've heard that having two character names that start with the same letter is a "no no."

Should I consider a name change for my characters if one is a 30-something black man named Marcus and another is a 10-year old white child named Molly?

The question isn't if they are two characters, but two MAIN characters. Marcus and Molly as the two main characters isn't bad, but Mike and Mark, Tim and Tom, Harry and Henry...not so much.

These are little things I tend to notice when I read a manuscript, and if I notice it, it's probably something I'd suggest be changed in revision notes I send.  It's not a deal breaker at the submission stage cause it's so easily fixed.

I have a client who shall remain nameless who at one point sent me a manuscript with two characters named Tom. And then there was the other one with two countries named Smog and Smogg I think.  Fortunately, said client has learned to accept editorial notes with a minimum of hair tearing and garment rending, although he does seem to post this a lot:

 

Question: the query process is going so well I gotta shout from the rooftops!

Question:

I've got a this-never-happens number of full manuscript requests - more requests than rejections. And I started out shooting for the stars, so these agents asking for fulls have some pretty awesome clients. Even got a revise and resubmit.

My question is I want so badly to brag about who's reading my manuscript right now and I'm not sure how much it's okay to tell the world. It seems bad form to post details like names and such on my blog, so I've stuck to telling my friends and family.

I know it's often bad PR to detail the querying process and whine about all the rejections, but what about when you want to celebrate these successes as you wait and cross your fingers for an offer? Should I stick to hinting that I've sent out full manuscripts, or can I say how many are out right now? Because I can't imagine agents would really want people knowing when they're reviewing a manuscript.

And I know you don't tell agents who else you've queried, or who else has the manuscript, but when I get to that point where I've got an offer and have to give the other agents with the manuscript the heads up, is there a point where I should be telling them how many other manuscripts are out there, etc?

And in the unlikely scenario that should I end up with a my-diamond-shoes-are-too-tight problem of fielding more than one offer, would you recommend asking to see the contract first, before deciding, or would that be rude, leading an agent on by getting them to send you a contract? Would you rather an author be blunt and say they've got multiple offers?

I'm delighted to hear that you're getting more requests for fulls than rejections. That's a terrific place to be in the query process and I hope you enjoy it to the fullest.


NONE of this goes on your blog, or on Twitter, or on Facebook. NONE.  


You share this good news with your crit group, your very close friends and family. And you do so in moderation.


The reason you do this is cause, while I don't want to rain on your parade, requests are not offers; offers are not sales; sales are not careers.  In other words, store up this joy for the long haul. You'll need it come winter, and trust me, George RR Martin was talking about publishing when he said "winter is coming."


The other reason is you don't want to create too much expectation on your blot/twitter/Facebook.  You start yammering about this now, and two weeks from now people will want to know when they can buy the book.  Don't squander your joy by spreading it out far and wide. Hang on to it; hold it close.


Keep up the good work, and keep mum.

FaceOff Writing contest results

Here are the results for the FaceOff Writing contest.  As always the range and quality of the work is amazing. We had a lot of entries too, which is always fun!

GREAT use of the word prompts:

Joel Freiburger 9:08pm

Accomplice

One thick stripe of cranberry on the headstone. No-frills burial, surname only: Parker. Cheap as a stepchild’s. Freshest grave of the lot, hazy green in my scope’s viewfinder. Night vision changed the game for a cemetery caretaker like me.
Welcome to the fucking 21st century, grave robbers.
Rustling in the shadows. A cupped flashlight beam.
I stayed back until a shovel broke ground.
“This corpse had scleroses,” I said. “Gotta cut off the fingers for the rings.”
Scared the chocolate out of him. But he knew the deal.
I marked each new arrival, he did the harvesting. 50/50 profit.

El El Piper 11:05pm

“She went to parker car. Can you help me finder?”

Great turn of phrase

Dan 9:53pm
"bad news riding shotgun"

Deliciously creepy entries!

River Cameron 9:36pm

Steve 11:33pm

Lenny Liang 12:49am

Karen McCoy 3:49pm

Naomi 5:48pm

Deliciously meta

Steven 1:04pm

Jay 8:28pm

Deliciously subtle

Hilary Cusack 11:44pm

Donnaeverhart 8:10am

And of course, I always enjoy a good sharkscapade!

Dena Pawling 12:35am

Utterly surreal

CarolynnWith2Ns 10:20pm

I have no idea what this is but the voice is riveting

Mr Christmas Closet 7:17am

Semi- Finalists (listed in chrono order)

(1) Steve Forti 9:28pm

Parka, not parker. Not everything I say is with a Boston accent, you know.” Sandra rifled through the closet until she spied the rose colored coat, then dug through its pockets. “And where the hell is my snozzberry Chapstick?”

Della smirked and puckered loudly, the slim tube caressing her lips. “Finders, keepers.”

Sandra dove across the room and tackled her sister off the bed, wrenching the balm from her.

“Ow! Don’t be such a child.”

Sandra shrugged. “You are what you eat.” Zipping up her parka, she slammed the gingerbread door behind her and trudged out into the snow.

(2) Sisi 9:51pm

I counted the child’s breaths as his chest rose and fell, inhale, exhale, strong and steady. He was safe with me. I was strong and steady. He squirmed, a slight frown marring his sleeping face, and I forced myself to relax my grasp on his fragile arm.

I tucked his well-loved bear under the blanket with him after deciphering the faded blue letters on the bear’s collar. Mayberry. He wrapped his arm around Mayberry without opening his eyes. The boy didn’t come with a name tag so I called him Parker, after the place we met.

I smiled. Finders keepers.

(3) Dan 9:53pm

The fair-haired child placed the rose atop the cop's grave. Her chubby hand curled around my fingers, sticky from the strawberry she had at lunch, discovered in our garden.

The rose had also come from the garden, where we had been happily puttering when the cruiser pulled up, bad news riding shotgun. Forget that old line about finders keepers. There were only losers and weepers today.

Officer Parker Selby was dead. This little girl was all I had left of him. Together, we would survive. And in 19 years, three months and six days, we would have our justice.

(4) Calorie Bombshell 10:31pm

It wasn’t quite the reunion show the late Dick Clark had envisioned.

“Axl Rose is in Paradise City until November. Rain forest jungle retreat.”

“What about Chuck Berry?”

“A definite no. Said Clark would be rolling over in his grave.”

“Who are you going to call next?”

“Ray Parker, Jr. Sang “Ghostbusters.”

“Tell him to wear the proton pack and bring some marshmallows. Look, you’re the brainchild of this Rock’n Roll Death Match. We need someone who doesn’t mind getting a little bloody.”

“How about Alice Cooper.”

“Who?”

"Long hair. Makeup. Rips heads off chickens."

“Perfect. A girl. Go finder.”

(5) Christina Seine 10:54pm

Mama always rose to the occasion. “Child,” she said. “You shut your mouth.”

It was true, though. Josiah Parker had a thing for her, and everybody knew it. I popped a fat blueberry into my mouth. It split, bled purple on my fingers and the Apartment Finder open on the kitchen table. I ate another one.

“You’re a mess,” Mama said. “Besides, best we move.” She rubbed her temple; the bruises had faded yellow. “It’s too soon, anyhow. It’s suspicious.”

“Ain’t,” I said, and grabbed another. Stains don’t bother me none. Enough bleach, you can clean away anything.

Or anybody.

(6) CH Lamb 6:51pm

‘So?’
Ben looked up from his precinct computer, opened on People Finder software and eyes widening, felt his jaw drop.
The borderline child-prostitute standing before him had a wand-like body showcased in berry-red knockoff satin and matching spiked heels, her breasts like little oranges under the tight fabric. She sashayed closer, and Ben caught the whiff of cheap rose perfume.
‘I think you’ll be lucky you’re undercover.’
‘Five women missing all from that corner and no one but me cares.’
And I love you, he thought, because you care. ‘Come home safely to me, Officer Parker.’
‘Same goes, Detective Parker.’

Finalists (listed in chrono order)

(7) Colin Smith 11:32pm

Joe took Miss Parker's hand as she led him to a chair.

"Now, child. A dark-haired man you say?"

"Yes," said Joe. "H-he killed Sam Berry. T-took a knife and..."

"Here, have some rosehip tea," said Miss Parker. "It'll calm your nerves. Works wonders for my arthritis." She smiled, handing Joe the teacup.

The door slammed. Joe gulped a mouthful of tea in shock.

"It's him!" he started to say, but couldn't get a breath. The dark-haired man made a move toward Joe, but Miss Parker stopped him.

"No, Finder," she said. "The cyanide will take him soon enough."

(8) Kate Outhwaite 11:53am

Finders, keepers. Losers, weepers!” taunted Billy Price, dangling his prize a foot above Rose Tomlinson’s reach before legging it towards the caretaker’s shed.

The lunchtime supervisor, Miss Berry, was nowhere to be seen. I pushed off from the wall and moved past the knot of younger children.

Behind the shed, Billy was dismembering the plastic pony key-ring.

He glanced at me. “What do you want, Parker?”

I twisted my ponytail round my finger and moved closer, running my tongue over my gap-tooth, pointy smile. The last words he heard were “I’m thirsty, Billy.”

I was naughty. I kept the key-ring.

(9) Celeste 6:20pm

Flash mob

@Our_Child_Missing. Rose never came home from school today. Last seen wearing strawberry print dress, carries a satchel. Finder's reward for our beautiful little girl. Whatever it takes. Plse help and retweet. 17:05

#Our_Child_Missing:
Strawberries are red
Violets are blue
I have her with me
Now I want cash from you
19:33

@Our_Child_Missing. Man arrested on suspicion of abduction. Our baby still missing. Pray for us. 20:16

@Our_Child_Missing. Rose found safe in the mall, thanks to thousands of retwts & phone calls. Sick creep who tweeted fake abduction just released by cops. His name is Parker. His address is...

(10) Ashland 8:33pm

Roses are red
A berry is blue
When Parker raped me
He said 'fuck you'


Years later he enters the club. I was a child when it happened, so he doesn't recognize me. When I tell our bouncer Shaun to let him know he's won a free ten in the champagne room, his eyes light with excitement.


Three minutes into 'Cherry Pie' I whip out the switchblade.
Two slashes crisscross his throat.
One long moan escapes.
Zero professional finders will ever locate his body.


Roses are red
The sky is now blue
When it was over
I said 'fuck you'






In the end I couldn't pick just one. Both #9 and #10 were great stories, well-told, and using form in a way that embellished the story. VERY hard to do that in the word constraints.

So, Two Winners!

Celeste and Ashland, if you'll email me at JetReidLiterary@gmail.com with your mailing address, each of you will get a copy of FaceOff.

Congratulations to you both, and thanks to all who entered. This was a terrific contest!