Wednesday, October 10, 2018

The DoY wasn't the only one yowling this week

One of the many pleasures of working from home (even when it's organizing the disarray created by a spontaneously combusting computer and outdated software) is that I can make a tuna sandwich for lunch.

I don't take tuna sans to the office cause tuna is...well...bold.

Thus, today I had my tuna on a bun in one hand, my mouse in the other, and I may have been swilling Gatorade from a beverage bonnet.

Enter Her Grace, the Duchess of Yowl

DoY: Yummy tummy Tuna!

Me: (feverishly sorting 27,000 emails) Mine!

DoY: (royal sneer) Don't be obtuse. Everything is mine.

Me: If this computer is yours, how come you aren't helping me test the new software?

DoY: As far as I'm concerned software is the royal blankie on the royal couch. And don't change the subject. Where's my royal tuna?

Me: Well, the truth is I ran out of tuna and bread so I put this last couple spoonfuls in a hot dog bun.

DoY: (gasping) Hot WHAT?

Me: It's really delicious, like a lobster roll but with tuna!

DoY: LOBSTER?? Things are looking up.

Me: No lobster. Tuna. Except I just ate the last of it.

DoY: My real mom lets me order sushi.

Me: I know for an ironclad fact she does not. She changed her login and password after you tried Seamless.

DoY: Well, it's lunch time, and you're slacking off here. Snap to it!

Me: I have some left over crow I had to eat for not updating my software ten years ago after everyone told me Word 2004 was outmoded and I dawdled along paying no mind.

DoY:  Bird! Yum!

Me: I saved you the best part. It's seasoned with my shredded ego.

DoY: Quit talking, start serving.

Me: Hang on for just a minute, there are only 25,000 emails left to sort.

The great email disorganization is finished, but if you're waiting on a reply to something you sent a while back, please feel free to resend. 


Dellcartoons said...

> DoY: (royal sneer) Don't be obtuse. Everything is mine.

I would say that Her Royal Catness is the Greatest for giving us lines like this, but she'd just respond w/: First of all, I already know that I am the Greatest. Secondly, that is not the only reason I'm the Greatest. And thirdly, why are you just sitting there when you could be feeding me tuna?

KariV said...

Oh cats. You gotta love them. Except for my husband, who's adamant we never get a cat. Then I introduced him to the Maine coon cat breed. Guess who now sees a cat in the distant future?

Craig F said...

Add a little curry powder to your tuna salad stuff. It will keep it from talking back to you all day.

I don't know if my cats are weird( they are, but mom always said to play nice) but they don't like tuns. They love tuna juice enough to wake up from a nap three rooms away and come running. Put tuna down and they go back to their nap, rather than eat it.

Casey Karp said...

Around here, tuna is considered okay, but the real prize is salmon juice. That's the liquid left over from canned, smoked salmon. Distributing that requires multiple bowls and elite cat-herding skills to ensure everyone gets some and nobody gets a claw to the face.

I'm not even going to mention what version of Word I use. It gets the job done. 'Nuff said.

Dan Phalen said...

Your Sharkiness,did you find my query from 15 July 2012? It ought to be emerging at the top of the stack right about now. Or maybe next week. Soon anyway. If so, pls don't bother to respond. I lost the MS in the 2013 move from Oregon. I've since moved on to vampire romance, that new genre heating up the charts. Will sub when done.

Her Grace, Heidi, the Duchess of Kneale said...

I feel ya.

Happy Book Birthday to me today! I likewise celebrated with a lunch of nice wood-smoked salmon. Result: I had to fight the Mango Tango for it, followed by many kitten kisses while he tried to get to the last of the salmon lingering on my unrepentant lips.

Later I shall celebrate with a Cleobuttera molten lava mug cake. At least I don't have to fight the cat for that. (The husband, on the other hand...)