I will be sending queries out soon, but I'm a trans guy pre-everything, including legal change of my female name, meaning it's going to take a while until I'm through with all of that and I don't want to wait several months with sending queries, now that the manuscript is finished.
I've read on your blog that it's okay not to mention one's "real" name in a query, but other blogs/websites/whatevs say I should definitely mention my address and "real" name at the top of the manuscript if an agent requests full.
Do I have to do that, even if I send everything per e-mail? And if I really have to, can I just mention in a post scriptum that I'm trans and want to be addressed with the male name and male pronouns?
No you don't have to do that.
The only thing you HAVE to do is write a compelling query, and a compelling novel.
And you don't need to tell me to address you as a gent. Just sign your male name and if it's a gender neutral first name you can preface it with (Mr.)
But you might mention you are trans in the bio section of your query letter if you want to. I know a lot of agents are looking for writers who are LGTBQ so this might be something that will boost your query.
As to the larger question: your real name is the one you want to use. Don't apologize, don't say "I prefer to be called" just say "Hi my name is Felix Buttonweezer"
If it doesn't say Felix Buttonweezer on your government issued ID right now, well, you don't need to show ID to query.
The ONLY time you'll need to address this is when you get down to cashing checks. The IRS is rather conservative about names and tax payer ID numbers. At that point, you can set up an LLC (limited liability
You might want to start on that NOW since it can take a while to get that going.
Bottom line: who you are is your business. How you write and how to pay you are my primary interests.
Speaking of post scripts here's mine: Best wishes to you on this very challenging journey you're undertaking.