The post preceding this quoted a reply to a form rejection that made us laugh here in the Lair. Truthfully, those kinds of things are so far out in left field they don't even bother me.
But, it did prompt one commenter to wonder what the ellipses (correctly used of course!) had replaced. Her offering:
Reading the comments is as much fun as the post! William Shatner, King's Speech, Ha! How about a little "fill in the blanks?" Maybe (s)he left out some important parts:
You know, if you had read my work (after drinking a fifth of gin, since that's how I wrote it), or spoken to me about my writing (method, which, again, involves gin, lots of gin), (You might not) reject my writing in a measured process, (which you were kind enough to do). (If you do not drink), well, that is your right. But, (I fear this may lead you) to not even know what you are rejecting. (It makes sense with gin! I hope you don't think of me:) what a fucking idiot. (Or,) thank god I'm not going to work with you, (because I hear this was Raymond Chandler's method as well. Thank you again for your time and consideration!)
There, that's a bit nicer, I think.
Now, I must tell you, this just cracked me up completely.
So, in honor of Sheila JG we shall have a new and exciting writing contest: fill in the blank! Like mad libs, but not.
Here's the PS to this querier's email. Fill in your choice of words where the ellipses are now used. And a string of commas counts as an ellipsis!
p.s.- your industry is dying,...you have already seen the implosion of Border's,..and B&N is not far behind,.....internet publishing and self-publishing is going to eat you ass-holes for lunch,.....but you just sit there and keep rejecting writing that you haven't even read.....Jesus Christ,...do you have a rich husband or something?,,,,I don't see how you make an income,....
MAXIMUM 200 words including the words you've been given. Post your entry in the comment column of THIS post.
Contest starts now (8:30pm EST Wednesday 2/23/11) and runs till 8:30pm (EST) tomorrow, Thursday.
Yes there will be a prize. I'm not sure what it will be yet but we'll figure out something fun.