tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post8517032015002785258..comments2024-03-18T09:09:59.625-04:00Comments on Janet Reid, Literary Agent: Thank you God for failureJanet Reidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00615380335938685231noreply@blogger.comBlogger54125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-48127298674877326672016-10-28T14:58:23.747-04:002016-10-28T14:58:23.747-04:00Coming late to this post, but it offers beautiful ...Coming late to this post, but it offers beautiful inspiration on this cold and cloudy morning in South San Francisco. Love the Edison quote, the Gaiman quote, and the Rowling video. At my conference here, they also talked about how important it is to learn how to fail. And how to keep moving forward. Karen McCoyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02640324898284007337noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-25504726272899692332016-10-27T18:29:58.147-04:002016-10-27T18:29:58.147-04:00They say it takes 10,000 hours of practice to deve...They say it takes 10,000 hours of practice to develop mastery. In order to get those hours, you must be willing to accept failure... because you'll be doing a lot of it (speaking from experience). And I've realized there is no fast track to mastery. So write on. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17063609643131595002noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-64681119716626947102016-10-27T14:15:45.169-04:002016-10-27T14:15:45.169-04:00Learning to accept and even appreciate failure was...Learning to accept and even appreciate failure was incredibly difficult for me.<br /><br />I'm trying to work on it with my kids while they're still young, particularly with my daughter who once felt incredibly distressed if she didn't achieve something perfectly on the first try. Now we talk about how things we did wrong helped us during our day, and working so hard to help her have a better view of failure has helped me in my own writing journey. <br /><br />Rejections and failure still suck, but they're much easier to view in a "Well that didn't work, let's try this," kind of light.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12146136846875431598noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-69043582780453830492016-10-27T06:26:56.353-04:002016-10-27T06:26:56.353-04:00After all these encouraging comments I'm almos...After all these encouraging comments I'm almost looking forward to failure!! (In the query trenches that is - I'm well acquainted with failure in other aspects of my life!!)<br /><br />It'll be a while until my book's ready to query but when those rejections start amassing I'll know to soothe my battered ego with a quiet rereading this post.<br /><br />MA Hudsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11055543285024785889noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-8288845918659503742016-10-27T01:15:48.831-04:002016-10-27T01:15:48.831-04:00I feel like I just ran a marathon. So exhausted, a...I feel like I just ran a marathon. So exhausted, and yet, so exhilarated at the same time.<br /><br />After reading Janet's fantastic post and then so many incredible comments, I've had a million thoughts running through my head.<br /><br />But I can't even get my failures listed in the allotted 100 words. (First time I've loved that rule!) So I'll just say two things to Janet and all you sweet commenters:<br /><br />1. Thank you!<br />2. Keep failing.<br />3. I love this place. (Darnit, I swear, I tried to stop at two. Seriously.)<br /><br />John Davis Frainhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18020019400599228492noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-56252039376552544002016-10-26T23:52:40.943-04:002016-10-26T23:52:40.943-04:00I'm avoiding all political commentary for my o...I'm avoiding all political commentary for my own sanity; 'O Canada' starts playing as my mental background music if I think too much about it.<br /><br />I think 'failure' at whatever we're trying is just an opportunity to teach someone else. Scars (physical or emotional) become stories and those stories can be used to show others an easier or better way.abnormalalienhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08666555569560028852noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-62211390448957248892016-10-26T22:52:40.246-04:002016-10-26T22:52:40.246-04:00It's all about defining the word "failure...It's all about defining the word "failure". True failure is when it's over - when you'll never take another step along the path. But if an experience moves you forward, or sideways, or even backwards, it isn't failure. It's just repositioning. Keep getting up. Keep on keeping on.Amy Schaeferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17263719891092841767noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-71477202791591842662016-10-26T21:56:03.599-04:002016-10-26T21:56:03.599-04:00JK Rowling gave a beautiful speech on failure at a...JK Rowling gave a beautiful speech on failure at a Harvard Graduation.<br /><br /><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Ov2IayHqPQ" rel="nofollow">"JK ROWLING On Failure"</a> <br /><br /><br />Sometimes you have to be brave enough to dare to risk it all.<br /><br />Megan Vhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00752842865397799428noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-43694362566438893272016-10-26T21:33:47.078-04:002016-10-26T21:33:47.078-04:00Janet, have you ever thought about writing a book ...Janet, have you ever thought about writing a book for writers? because I would so buy that. Thanks for this post.<br /><br /><b>Melanie Sue Bowles</b> - yes it's non-fiction, but just so you know, your DOGS OF PROUD SPIRIT has made me laugh as well as cry in public. Your dad btw sounds just like mine, making you race the rain. I loved that more than I can describe! You prob. aren't reading comments anymore (heck prob. no one is) but I wanted to put that out there!<br />Lennon Farishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03570629350169504234noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-48493022180498665482016-10-26T19:58:04.097-04:002016-10-26T19:58:04.097-04:00When you put a piece of paper out in a torrential ...When you put a piece of paper out in a torrential rainstorm, most of the drops are not going to hit it. Her Grace, Heidi, the Duchess of Knealehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17818060864422019573noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-65855969642601521332016-10-26T19:55:34.732-04:002016-10-26T19:55:34.732-04:00"To risk and fail is better than not risking ..."To risk and fail is better than not risking but not succeeding."<br /><br />Hmm. Once I failed to risk and succeeded by failing. Years ago, my brothers and I almost bought a fourplex one block off the ocean. The price the owner asked was $3,000 over the appraisal so we said "No." It’s now worth hundreds of thousands more. <br /><br />Thank heavens we didn’t buy it! I was at the time a total know-it-all. A successful investment at that time would have made me so fat-headed I wouldn’t have been able to get through any of the doors only humility opens. <br /><br />Pam Powellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10535615408563055466noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-13567880840429120072016-10-26T19:31:35.689-04:002016-10-26T19:31:35.689-04:00So many snippets to squirrel away for future times...So many snippets to squirrel away for future times when a word of encouragement is needed. Thanks to all who weighed in. <br /><br />It is sometimes daunting to think that we may strive for something that is out of our reach. This reality of the sandbox we choose to play in should not deter us, though. Creating is in our control. Trying is in our control. Putting in the time and effort to get better is in our control. <br /><br />Best of luck!RosannaMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06399732751877180737noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-79325309803409899182016-10-26T19:09:00.998-04:002016-10-26T19:09:00.998-04:00What a post - and comment trail! *blinks away tear...What a post - and comment trail! *blinks away tears*<br />Thank you, everyone. I needed this today.Kae Ridwynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10356868531870405990noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-81099316243620937272016-10-26T18:31:51.968-04:002016-10-26T18:31:51.968-04:00She's right, but it doesn't make it one sm...She's right, but it doesn't make it one smidge easier. Matt Adamshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10566969805157519527noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-85256554733047579332016-10-26T18:21:11.485-04:002016-10-26T18:21:11.485-04:00kdjames: I printed that one out. Great quote! Than...<b>kdjames</b>: I printed that one out. Great quote! Thank you!Claire Bobrowhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15666082441972111293noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-24825925522488875712016-10-26T18:10:51.128-04:002016-10-26T18:10:51.128-04:00Here Here Janet!
I have just received a manuscrip...Here Here Janet!<br /><br />I have just received a manuscript back from my editor and she ripped it apart... and it was glorious!<br /><br />I am learning everyday. Renewed enthusiasm, renewed end goal and already my changes are working. Each time I "get it" more.<br /><br />I also sing and AD and mistakes only teach us to grow. I am infuriated when people tell me they "can't" do something. I counter with "Rubbish, you just need to learn. Study, research and practice, fall and get back up."<br /><br />Another terrific post!<br />thank youAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-83119526330094305042016-10-26T18:01:18.261-04:002016-10-26T18:01:18.261-04:00I just deleted a long comment about this (you'...I just deleted a long comment about this (you're welcome) and will simply say that if you've been "lucky" enough to have someone in your life with <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_personality_disorder" rel="nofollow">Narcissistic Personality Disorder</a>, it's pretty easy to recognize the symptoms. And really tough to decide whether you feel more sorry for that person or for the people around them. The usual rules don't apply.<br /><br />On the subject of "failure" and mistakes, I love what Neil Gaiman wrote for <a href="http://journal.neilgaiman.com/2011/12/my-new-year-wish.html" rel="nofollow">his 2012 New Year wish</a>, and remind myself of it often:<br /><br /><b>I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes.<br /><br />Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You're doing things you've never done before, and more importantly, you're Doing Something.<br /><br />So that's my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody's ever made before. Don't freeze, don't stop, don't worry that it isn't good enough, or it isn't perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life.<br /><br />Whatever it is you're scared of doing, Do it.<br /><br />Make your mistakes, next year and forever.</b><br /><br />Great post, Janet.<br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-52242972326957210092016-10-26T15:53:32.806-04:002016-10-26T15:53:32.806-04:00Thanks for this post, Janet.
I'm learning to...Thanks for this post, Janet. <br /><br />I'm learning to embrace failure more with every passing year because it means I'm trying. The specter of embarrassment and humiliation is still there, but it doesn't bother me nearly as much anymore. Thank you, middle age! This is in inverse proportion to how my kids feel about me. The less embarrassed I am about what I do and say, the more embarrassed they are! Ah, the circle of life.<br /><br />So many of you had inspiring words to say about failure. Thank you for lifting me up. I'm tucking your comments away in my inner psyche because I have a Skype critique later this evening with an editor - gulp. Hoping for some constructive criticism...Claire Bobrowhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15666082441972111293noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-38484540689923375052016-10-26T15:33:51.670-04:002016-10-26T15:33:51.670-04:00On a note about success, our Donna's Dixie Dup...On a note about success, our Donna's <i>Dixie Dupree</i> is on sale for $9 on <a href="https://www.amazon.com/dp/1496705513/ref=wl_it_dp_o_pd_nS_ttl?_encoding=UTF8&colid=33IR3QH5GT1IJ&coliid=I38X6BTZVZSGIR" rel="nofollow">Amazon</a>.Brigidhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13768090206152536761noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-38826234580843794022016-10-26T14:22:14.896-04:002016-10-26T14:22:14.896-04:00Janet, your dad's saying reminded me of my dad...Janet, your dad's saying reminded me of my dad. He didn't say that, but he lived it. He was a very stubborn man - it's family quality and we're proud of it - and if he had a choice between doing something the right way or the popular way, he'd always choose the right way.<br /><br />I'm sure we all have our regrets and failures. I do. Even my dad did. I probably look like a failure to most people right now, but as my dad would say - even after he lost the ability to communicate easily: "So?" It doesn't matter what other people think. The only thing that matters is doing what's right, and to keep doing it, no matter how hard it is. For me, that's writing and trying to get published.<br /><br />Off Topic: I'm sorry. As Janice mentioned, I was at Surrey all weekend and just got home yesterday. I'm afraid I was lax reading this blog, and I'm just now catching up.<br /><br />I just read Janice's note about me, and I'm blushing. You should know, Janice is also really nice - and she wears a witch's hat beautifully. I didn't recognize such a nice person in that costume!<br /><br />Julie: I'm sorry I didn't see your message about how to find the Compuserve folks earlier, so I didn't ask Kathy. I was looking at nametags, wondering, "Is this person one of Julie's friends?" But I didn't know who to ask. I'll remember this for next year. I want to be adopted!BJ Muntainhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12977414826388000094noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-51003091380064875182016-10-26T12:30:16.868-04:002016-10-26T12:30:16.868-04:00I think Trump was impressed early on to hate failu...I think Trump was impressed early on to hate failure. He was driven to please his father. That can be good, but it's walking a razor thin wire at times between a force for good and an unhealthy obsession.<br /><br />I think it's sad when parents imprint these fatal flaws on their children. In reading about Hemingway's personal life, I have often wished I could have just been a friend to him, wanting nothing but a simple friendship. His mother told him all his life he was a failure because he couldn't live up to the greatness that was her father. What a burden to put on a child.<br /><br />I've created my own little Hemingway in <i>Rain Crow</i> who is a Union captain rather than a writer. We'll see how his life turns out.<br /><br />I confess, I've pretty much felt like a failure lately and it can be debilitating. A cousin of mine once remarked "My mother was always very proud of the fact that she raised her girls right" insinuating, of course, that I was trash like my mother. I thought at the time, "Buttercup, be thankful you were raised right. You wouldn't have survived my raising."<br /><br />I wondered at the time if my whole family looks down on me and then realized it didn't matter. We all have our own journey and for whatever reason, this is the path I was set on. It's up to me to make the best of it.<br /><br /><b>Dena</b> My very best to you and your son. My father married a woman with two beautiful twin baby daughters. Unfortunately, they learned later they were mentally handicapped. It completely unhinged the woman, but she became a staunch advocate for the handicapped and reforms at the state mental hospital. She used to take me with her on the pilgrimages to the state hospital where she would do battle with the director about conditions and I, beginning at twelve, would wander around visiting with patients or sit quietly in the office. It was an experience.<br /><br />One young man with hydrocephalus was in a crib. There were rows and rows of them lined up like tombstones at Arlington in a huge dimmed room. I heard a voice from behind me as I walked by, trailing behind Nita who was arguing with the director as they walked through the room. "Hello there," he said.<br /><br />I turned back. "Hello."<br /><br />I was shocked at his appearance, but visited with him for quite a while until Nita noticed I was missing and yelled at me. He thanked me for talking to him, saying it gets lonely just lying there day in and day out.<br /><br />Another young man came into the office while I was sitting in the reception area waiting. He told me about his girl friend and showed me his little pocket radio. The secretary tried to shoo him out, but I told her he was fine. His radio needed batteries. He had a deck of cards he showed me that he was very proud of, so we went through the cards looking at each one and talking about them.<br /><br />He came to the queens of hearts and gave it to me. I tried to decline, saying it would ruin his deck, but he insisted. The secretary told me to take it. It would mean a lot to him, so I did.<br /><br />I asked Nita if we could leave some money for batteries, which she did. The same boy usually found me whenever we came to visit. He had a sort of radar.<br /><br />So, when I get to feeling too sorry for myself, I think back to someone lying in a darkened room, starving for someone to talk to. JulieWeathershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01361549099072091350noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-82701450401116127632016-10-26T11:42:16.285-04:002016-10-26T11:42:16.285-04:00Thank you all for the words of wisdom in this comm...Thank you all for the words of wisdom in this comment thread (and thank you Janet for the wisdom of the post)! It's a strange idea, but I think "If you're always succeeding, then you're not reaching high enough" is a good guideline for how to live a full life. <br /><br />I'm also grateful for all the cool pieces of advice here. My dad isn't a wise man and he isn't a good man, but he's taught me a lot about failure by the way he lives. He uses his failures as excuses to rest easy. That decision has ruined his life and the lives around him. Trying again isn't just the right thing to do - it's the only way to really live.Bethany Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12829932931010851406noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-77616123773389898872016-10-26T11:41:26.837-04:002016-10-26T11:41:26.837-04:00Somehow I don’t see the learning process as failur...Somehow I don’t see the learning process as failure. I see GIVING UP as failure. Surely, you have seen this before, but if you have not, check it out:<br /><br />http://www.kiplingsociety.co.uk/poems_if.htm<br /><br />Favorite lines from this:<br /><br /> If you can deal with triumph and disaster,<br /> And treat those two impostors just the same.<br /><br />People who enjoy learning do not consider the learning experience as failure. There is a difference between daring to lose and choosing Loser as a lifestyle. Losers proudly (and loudly) proclaim themselves to the world as Losers (as in, “I AM a failure.”)<br /><br />Temporary setbacks are just speed bumps on the drag strip of life.<br /><br />Craig got the comparison wrong. Trump’s political role model is not George Wallace (who was actually a Ted Kennedy liberal masquerading as a racist out ot fear of the KKK.) Trump’s role model is Adolf Hitler. Xenophobia, racism, misogyny, ethnic cleaning, disdain for the disabled, all come from the Hitler playbook. Trump does not bug me. The dangerous people are the rednecks who are champing at the bits to vote for him, just as Hitler’s supporters did. Hitler was just a corporal with a raspy voice. His millions of supporters were the ones who were dangerous.<br /><br />The NY Slumlord reality show will continue long after November regardless of which loser loses. Stop watching CNN until he keels over.<br /><br />Then they have to go into reruns.<br />Steve Stubbshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13421775912951050610noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-16033039478167044332016-10-26T11:27:51.195-04:002016-10-26T11:27:51.195-04:00Thanks for a great post, Janet!
One of my colleag...Thanks for a great post, Janet!<br /><br />One of my colleagues likes to say "Put your worst foot forward." When you embrace your failures is when you can grow and learn from them; and sharing your failures with others is an opportunity to connect with them, because there are few experiences more universal, more human, than failure.Adib Khorramhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03836332867898941638noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-71990321858041724852016-10-26T11:25:03.170-04:002016-10-26T11:25:03.170-04:00I can say with certainty I only landed an agent be...I can say with certainty I only landed an agent because of a plethora of failures. The book I signed was a YA. I learned how to write a YA from the whole entire book I discarded because I tried to shove a MG idea in a YA format. The book I signed was decently plotted. I learned how to plot by throwing out at least 3 full length novels with terrible plotting. The book I signed with had a strong central conflict. I know how to write a strong central conflict because I threw out two books where I failed to do so.<br /><br />Dig this post, obviously. <br /><br />Colin - congrats on the house!Lucie Witthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08521285162656949602noreply@blogger.com