tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post4606685070663108447..comments2024-03-18T09:09:59.625-04:00Comments on Janet Reid, Literary Agent: We've got your numberJanet Reidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00615380335938685231noreply@blogger.comBlogger50125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-37378914911943359882011-01-29T06:16:22.546-05:002011-01-29T06:16:22.546-05:00My father reminds me I do not follow instructions ...My father reminds me I do not follow instructions and, after reading this blog, I am in a familiar position. "Don't rush when you take out the honeybucket," "make sure that its dead," "careful not to pop the walrus ingaluaqs," and "you should really bring a stick" are instructions I now understand, and can even relay to others from a position of wisdom. In retrospect I should not have attached my work. Rather I should have wrote the two pages, as instructed, (instead of now flailing for some clever anecdotes to grab attention) and I would not be wondering if I should resubmit in weary fashion. After a long and precise introduction perhaps the first two pages were, in my mind, slow. As the third page is the hook, it was difficult to suppress the urge to attach the entire piece... suggestions?Inupiurallasinilupiagatugniaqtungahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05173928338715409779noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-70384065386496220962011-01-27T21:49:30.758-05:002011-01-27T21:49:30.758-05:00I cannot imagine cold-calling an agent. I have tro...I cannot imagine cold-calling an agent. I have trouble just calling my doctor (whom I've had for 20+ years!) for an appointment -- I always feel as if I am intruding on his very busy day.<br /><br />The thing that has been drilled into me in the past 5 years of researching marketing my writing is <i>follow the instructions of the agent/editor/publisher!</i>. If an agent says "e-mail queries only," then I think the <b>only</b> acceptable method for a query is - well, an e-mail.<br /><br />I can see the case where I might simply be confused or mistaken. I know that sometimes I think I have something confidently understood and then I discover I was completely mistaken. But I can't accept that a mistake compounded by rudeness is going to get me access to an agent. (Agent: I am desperate for queries; just can't get enough! Clueless writer: HELLO AND GOOD EVENING I HOPE I DIDN'T DISTURB YOUR SLEEP... Agent: Maybe I was mistaken...)stephen matlockhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04547568823080880459noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-64413489649712774352011-01-27T20:09:56.162-05:002011-01-27T20:09:56.162-05:00That is some impressive hubris from the caller. I ...That is some impressive hubris from the caller. I can only hope she is as brilliantly talented as she is rude...I presume she carted her thumb drive over to the Random House lobby and asked to see the editor in chief when she failed with FPL.<br /><br />@Abbe: PERFECT!lora96https://www.blogger.com/profile/08171062741089674769noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-75153154154355575012011-01-27T19:36:10.427-05:002011-01-27T19:36:10.427-05:00Hmmm, yes. Let me call up an expert - an expert wh...Hmmm, yes. Let me call up an expert - an expert whose help I want, mind you - and first be rude, and then tell them them that they're an idiot. What an EXCELLENT strategy. <br /><br />Oh, wait a minute....<br /><br />Sigh. If it's any consolation, you're not alone: people do this in my profession, too. Never mind that I have a doctorate and 16years' experience; I didn't say what they wanted to hear, so clearly I AM AN IDIOT. I guess they told ME.<br /><br />(On the plus side, they do sometimes provide weeks of amusement for me and my staff, and occasionally - carefully disguised - end up as blog posts, thus providing amusement for many others, as well.)<br /><br />Oh, well; good for some laughs, anyway.AKDDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10533003137934379516noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-16116136093687303252011-01-27T15:31:38.802-05:002011-01-27T15:31:38.802-05:00Man, that is lame. I'm sorry y'all have t...Man, that is lame. I'm sorry y'all have to deal with crazies like that. You should get a guard dog for your agency headquarters. :)Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01667256642861152906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-80234103438282264382011-01-27T15:04:55.346-05:002011-01-27T15:04:55.346-05:00Mink, this is an agent's way of playing hard t...Mink, this is an agent's way of playing hard to get. Call back, meow into the phone and tell her to stop being coy.<br />Oh, and when you get transferred to her voicemail don't be fooled by the dialtone. That's just a ruse to weed out the idiots. You go ahead and leave a message.Lyrahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14720690683377243037noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-27969690999072782072011-01-27T14:37:29.409-05:002011-01-27T14:37:29.409-05:00Holy hell. Brava, Ms. Reid.
Calling is bad. But ...Holy hell. Brava, Ms. Reid. <br /><br />Calling is bad. But calling and then being rude? Much worse. <br /><br />Caller ID is awesome. ~AliAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-8229366870425755972011-01-27T11:46:30.316-05:002011-01-27T11:46:30.316-05:00Awesome! Janet Reid is now writing about me on her...Awesome! Janet Reid is now writing about me on her blog! Does anyone have the number for Ari Gold?Munkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04921320770712443773noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-39220415200929839022011-01-27T09:30:10.399-05:002011-01-27T09:30:10.399-05:00What if it was one of those Jersey Shore guys. Sno...What if it was one of those Jersey Shore guys. Snooki's a bestseller, after all. You might have missed out on something there.<br /><br />Or maybe it was one of those mobsters rounded up last week. Imagine a memoir written by "Tony Bagels" or "Junior Lollipops."<br /><br />Actually, you did good.Sheila JGhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15371582292020275894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-32193491623677095602011-01-27T06:23:33.488-05:002011-01-27T06:23:33.488-05:00Any naive, nervous, anxious writer that makes the ...Any naive, nervous, anxious writer that makes the industry mistake of calling and Agent, Editor, wouldn't yell, "your an idiot" and slam down the phone. If they were told the Agency doesn't take phone queries, the sane person would then inquire about how they could/should submit. <br />There is just no question that this was an ego of great proportions on the other end of the line. I'm just surprised this character didn't start his conversation with "I wanna HIRE one of you agents!" (they usually think that's how it works:)Christine Tripphttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05058419743726981987noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-68126417897146104642011-01-27T05:28:53.828-05:002011-01-27T05:28:53.828-05:00Roddy, you might be surprised to learn that this k...Roddy, you might be surprised to learn that this kind of call gets handled much more gently when the caller doesn't start with "what do you think?"<br /><br />We can tell the difference between the caller you describe, and the caller who simply thinks picking up the phone and talking to an agent is Step 1 on the path to Authorial Glory.Janet Reidhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00615380335938685231noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-87357925894857488352011-01-27T04:16:34.085-05:002011-01-27T04:16:34.085-05:00Whoever it was may have been taking their very fir...Whoever it was may have been taking their very first steps, was probably nervous, tense and anxious. For you to abruptly shut the door with a, "We aren't" rather than a, "We don't take phone queries. You can write to us. Have you got our address?" would have been very upsetting.<br />In my humblest of opinions, you didn't handle that well.Roddy Machttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12560934751523460328noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-15122270308131548702011-01-27T02:12:23.605-05:002011-01-27T02:12:23.605-05:00Literary Darwinism in action?
Sadly, that writer ...Literary Darwinism in action?<br /><br />Sadly, that writer may be going down a long list of agents calls and having the same experience each time. <br />The result will not be the writer thinking, 'I'm going about this all wrong', but will more likely be, 'all agents are rude.'Ebony McKenna.https://www.blogger.com/profile/02724727996270658767noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-56567213112679906442011-01-27T00:15:02.618-05:002011-01-27T00:15:02.618-05:00Really? Fine Print doesn't take queries over t...Really? Fine Print doesn't take queries over the phone? All the super-great, super-serious agencies do. You guys really need to get w/the program. *hee*Debra Lynn Sheltonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08238268767406623274noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-5335917468688685332011-01-26T23:30:37.157-05:002011-01-26T23:30:37.157-05:00Wow. Thanks for the laugh. :)Wow. Thanks for the laugh. :)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01211512381536699167noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-76553894161411896222011-01-26T22:18:53.615-05:002011-01-26T22:18:53.615-05:00abbe: you are awesome.abbe: you are awesome.Joel Brownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11611692901113614564noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-86961680800460030832011-01-26T22:15:21.377-05:002011-01-26T22:15:21.377-05:00I need my Query Shark fix. Need. Fix.
"Ring....I need my Query Shark fix. Need. Fix.<br /><br />"Ring. Ring."<br />"Who's there?"<br />"I wanna."<br />"I wanna who?"<br />"I wanna who agent. Mine isn't returning my calls."<br /><br />"Ring. Ring."<br />"Who's there?"<br />"An author."<br />"An author who?"<br />"An author who never finis..."<br />"Hello? Hello?"<br /><br />"Ring. Ring."<br />"Who's there?"<br />"Mer Bear."<br />"Mer Bear who?"<br />"Mer Bear who won't let you talk to Janet. Ahahahahaha."<br /><br />"Ring. Ring."<br />"Who's there?"<br />"Queen Anne."<br />"Queen Anne who?"<br />"Bungalow."<br />"Bungalow who?"<br />"Georgian."<br />"Georgian who?"<br />"Oh. Random House. Please hold for Janet."Joel Brownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11611692901113614564noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-38649630867356036842011-01-26T20:10:25.968-05:002011-01-26T20:10:25.968-05:00I've always thought the best start to any work...I've always thought the best start to any working relationship is a soupcon of abuse and a modicum of intemperate rage. Best that they get used to it up front, I always say. ^_^Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16398394255011968938noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-65302370672735346592011-01-26T20:07:26.007-05:002011-01-26T20:07:26.007-05:00Ha! That is great! What happened to common courtes...Ha! That is great! What happened to common courtesy!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02953440041536434213noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-791123267995629712011-01-26T19:40:38.534-05:002011-01-26T19:40:38.534-05:00Tell me you looked up his number on 411.com!!!Tell me you looked up his number on 411.com!!!Kathryn Rosehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05270893925385208665noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-90602118534811248722011-01-26T19:22:20.034-05:002011-01-26T19:22:20.034-05:00I do like how *he* slammed the phone on you though...I do like how *he* slammed the phone on you though. That's just a whole 'nother side dish of crazy.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-90530470348818284582011-01-26T18:54:00.526-05:002011-01-26T18:54:00.526-05:00As your assistants are obviously very valuable and...As your assistants are obviously very valuable and too busy to do things like field ridiculous phone calls, I suggest throwing caution to the wind and indulging in a little light child labor.<br /><br />Go out and find the most sullen 14 year old you can. Transfer these calls to him/her. Allow said teenager to listen to ipod while talking with nonpotential clients.<br /><br />The calls will stop.Davidhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16679613223759580578noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-52410635410106040382011-01-26T18:49:57.567-05:002011-01-26T18:49:57.567-05:00Did you ask He Who Must Not Be Named why he was us...Did you ask He Who Must Not Be Named why he was using the fellytone?Michael G-Ghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07947421844294471304noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-65456735483959308462011-01-26T18:12:11.764-05:002011-01-26T18:12:11.764-05:00Crass. I don't think idiots like that realize ...Crass. I don't think idiots like that realize word gets out, and their chances of getting a good agent probably just went from slim to nil. No one wants to work with an author with an attitude--unless it is a positive one.Adriana Noirhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03746047712229252970noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17040756.post-65818572317885088252011-01-26T18:08:46.660-05:002011-01-26T18:08:46.660-05:00I hope it didn't start with 1-900, cuz it'...I hope it didn't start with 1-900, cuz it'll cost you to call him/her back. Or ... so I've heard.:-)Shannon Heatherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06346078649346825497noreply@blogger.com