Saturday, February 16, 2019

The joy of mute

Recently, someone I don't know at all scolded me on Twitter for the blog post headlines not having keywords. "What's your goal for the blog?" she asked.

Well, ok, I guess that's one way to introduce yourself.

But, it's not all that effective. My response was annoyance, followed closely by "mute."
I'm pretty sure she saw herself as being helpful.
Me, I saw it as criticism from someone I didn't know, and as far as I can tell, isn't part of the community here.

And was left thinking how nice it would be if every human interaction could be accompanied by a mute button.

Cause I'd sure as hell mute the "reviewers" on Amazon who complain that the ebook price is too high (authors have no control over that); who complain the shipment was late (again, authors aren't delivering books to your house); and agents who make authors feel stupid (that's just insensitive ego at play).

Who do you want to mute?
And of course, who would want to mute you?

More problematic: who wants to mute me?



31 comments:

Jennifer Delozier said...

If I could just person to mute - just one - I'd choose my inner critic, who screams "imposter syndrome" every time I attempt a writerly activity.

Next would be nearly every politician in Washington. Things would be much more civil is they all had to mime their jobs.

DeadSpiderEye said...

Ever had a telephone conversation with a person when their thumb slipped from their mute button and they didn't notice?

Carolynnwith2Ns said...

You know that "kick me" note pinned to back of my shirt? Well, now it has been replaced by a "mute me" sticker stuck to my forehead. My husband and kids have a lifetime supply of those stickers. My friends, yup they have some. My grandchildren? They are still young enough to hang on every word I say, unless it's "no".

Kitty said...

I can't think of anyone I'd like to mute, least of all Janet.

Timothy Lowe said...

I'm with Jennifer. I'd love to mute myself, typically at 2 in the morning when I can't sleep because I'm wondering if the draft is ever going to come together.

NLiu said...

Who do I want to mute? Sad to admit it, but sometimes my baby when he screams for hours for no known reason.

P.S. Love that horse pic. Anyhorse we might know?

Aphra Pell said...

Politicians. The majority of them, it's not even a partisan thing. I'm British / Australian and I have brexit and all its works on one side, and positioning for an imminent general election on the other.

Also, the pet rat who is currently gnawing a piece of dry pasta VERY LOUDLY. He's vibrating it against the cage base for extra effect.

Michael Seese said...

Along the lines of people who complain because the Amazon book price is too high...

I recall reading a review in the Google Play Store of the Square app. The reviewer said it worked just fine, but gave it one star.

"I'm always forgetting to bring it. Put a key fob on it. Then I'll give it five stars."

So your inability to use your brain is somehow their fault?

Melanie Sue Bowles said...

I'm with Jennifer D on this... my inner critic.

And HA on the terrific photo of ponies. Love it. YAWN! Speaking of yawning: did you know that when horses yawn, they're rarely actually yawning. More often than not they are clearing their throat or cheeks of chewed grass.

Julie Weathers said...

I'm currently reworking/breaking my website. Lisa, the lady who instructs the course and thought it would be a good idea for me to take it, was prowling through my site and asked, "Julie, do you really need three categories referring to Janet Reid for blog posts?"

"Huh, I didn't even realize I'd opined about her that much. Nope. Let's get rid of her."

Actually, we just shuffled her over to the agent tag and query tag, though I'm wondering if she doesn't deserve her own cage. There are five blooming pages of posts with mentions of Janet Reid. I kid you not. Obviously I am not muting Janet.

People I do mute. Idiots and fools. Life is too short and I have better things to do. I've been informed I should have a social presence if I want to be an author, so I still have twitter, but a pox on @Jack. I would get rid of it, too if not for that and my 87-year-old mother I have daily phone conversations with. She's in a constant state of depression and I have several people who post funny stuff, so it gives me a chance to relate funny stories to her. I haven't had cable or cable news since 2008. I glean enough of what's going on in the world to explain the news to her because she says she never watches the news, then asks me what's this convoy on tv?

"No, idea, Mom. I don't have tv remember?"

It's easier to sift through headlines before I call to supplement the radio.

But, back to the original post, wouldn't it have been easier and a whole lot more polite to introduce yourself and then ask if the person were genuinely curious or didn't understand?

Lisa has been explaining how keywords work and why I need to tag each post and image. Oy vey. (said with a southern accent) I think me trying to be organized is how we wound up with three categories of Janet Reid.

Anyway. Time to take a shower and go shovel snow or go shovel snow and take a shower. Or maybe just go back to bed.

Brenda said...

I have a few memories I’d like to mute, but only a very few and a that’s why they bottle Malbec.
I’d like to mute authors who give other authors less than three star reviews. Didn’t your Mama tell you that if you ain’t got nothing nice to say, don’t say nothing at all.
No kidding, there was this gal on Facebook on a writers help page who was all in a panic about the ton of one star reviews she was seeing on her Goodreads account. She came back later, all relieved, and said she’d got confused. They were all reviews she’d given, not received. Like that made it OK.

Bonnie Shaljean said...

Couldn't somebody please invent a button that mutes ALL the news? Except when it's about cute animals or books. Cute animals and books get to stay.

Jill Warner said...

I saw that comment and I had to laugh because *clearly* she doesn't know about the community here.

As for myself, I need a mute button that kicks in around 6pm until I get some dinner and relax time in. (Either for myself or for the unfortunate people around me.)

Julie Weathers said...

BrendaLynn

"They were all reviews she’d given, not received. Like that made it OK."

I hope someone pointed out the hypocrisy. I've asked Joseph Snoe to do some guest posts on my site once I get it functioning again. He enters a lot of Goodreads contests and wins a lot of books. Then he does the most thoughtful reviews. I don't like doing reviews because I don't think I do them well, but I'm going to start doing more anyway. Authors deserve them if I have anything positive to say.

I've only left two negative reviews and the authors richly deserved both. I couldn't believe Amazon promoted that drivel. Don't promote your book as factual and then admit somewhere down the line when someone challenges you the lurid stories everyone is buzzing about are not true but a newspaper printed them, so you included them.

Beth Carpenter said...

I started thinking about all the voices I'd like to mute, from the family members who interupt when I'm in the middle of writing an intense scene (I can't find the scissors) to the alarmist headlines (Your Toothbrush May be Poisoning You) to useless reviews (I haven't used the tent but I love the color). And then there's all the name calling. It's probably a good thing I can't mute all annoyances, or I'd be in a silent and lonely world.

Laura Martin said...

I'd mute a certain review site that tends to review based of their political mindset instead of the quality of the story... I won't name names...but it rhymes with smirkus...

Adele said...

I would have posted a comment but I decided to mute myself. I hate complainers.


Brenda said...

Good point Adele. Adjusting my attitude as I speak. Er ... type.

Dena Pawling said...


Jessica Faust recently wrote a blog post about what agents and editors look for on an author's social media accounts. This line stuck with me - “I like to get a sense of whether or not she’s a positive and supportive person or angry and negative.”

I do tend to unfollow or mute folks who are angry and negative. Would be nice to have that sort of mute ability for those people in real life too. Life is full of negativity. It's nice to focus on the positives.


Julie Weathers said...

Dena

Yes, we discussed this on twitter. I was debating deleting my account. You responded and I said, "Yes, but you're not offending people."

"Bwahahahahaha! I'm a lawyer."

It was classic.

Mister Furkles said...

I'm pretty sure she saw herself as being helpful.

Janet, you're just too nice.

See that braying horsey. It should be a jackass because that is what the she is.

Don't sweat the morons.

Panda in Chief said...

My guess that person's comment was prelude to a suggestion you follow each other, so that she could sell you her course on SEO optimization. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha...

Ahem....

I do enjoy the feistiness of twidder. That said, the tedious: I mute; the obnoxious: I block; The downright scary and possibly fake, obviously hostile: I report and block.

Pandas don't take no shit.

Julie Weathers said...

Well, I imagine the person in question may read the blog. However, it seems her big things is SEO as Panda says. I'm sure she was trying to be helpful, however, this is the old if it's not broken don't fix it thing. Janet has been on the top 100 writer blogs every year since Moses was in diapers.

Craig F said...

I be not a twidder beastie. It is one purpose. I am one of the kindest and most considerate surly curmudgeons in the land, but I'm still a curmudgeon.

I fear that it would be I who got muted, not for offering unrequested advice to someone who does not even know you, much less accept your quirks and foibles. I would get muted because one of the masques might slip and the curmudgeon show through.

Elissa M said...

I've been working on my self-mute button for a long time. I was born critiquing the ambulance driver who delivered me. Now, after more than a half-century under my belt, I'm starting to learn to keep my mouth shut.

As for muting others, I'm with those who want less vociferous politicians. Fortunately, I don't have television, and it's easy to avoid listening to braying on the internet.

Unknown said...

I'm a little afraid of the social media side of publishing in general, because I'm... I don't want to say 'old' exactly, but when I first started thinking about honing my skills and wanting to become an author, I had a PC with Windows 3.1 and thought a modem was a polite term for an upper class woman.

In terms of muting, however, someone's already said the inner critic, but I'm seconding that. Also, people who insist on telling me I can't spell, because I've written 'Honour' or 'colour', and don't seem to have noticed the part where I say I'm a British writer approaching the British market. Or people who argue 'til they're blue in the face that I've got some historical details wrong (I write mostly historical crime fiction), but haven't actually researched and don't back down even after I show them 25 academic journal articles that say it's okay that I had a guy take a tram in 1920s Prague, because look, old photos, trams.

Lennon Faris said...

When someone stresses me out, there's some trigger in my brain that mutes them. The less mature side of me wishes they could see it. Like some glowing force field that pops up.

And yeah, def. those politicians.

John Davis Frain said...

Oh, I would LOVE a mute button.

I was officiating a basketball tournament championship today, and I would have muted scores of people in the stands.

Just once when someone suggests doubt in my intelligence (commonly expressed as "you're a blind idiot" among other things), I'd like to turn to them and say, "is that based on my latest flash fiction entry? Because the 200-word version was stellar, but I lost everything in the editing."

Okay, not a snappy enough answer. Especially for a flash fiction joke. Which is exactly why I need a mute button, thank you!

Writer Geek Esq said...

I'd like to mute the people who tell me--without having read a word of it--that the 180K SF novel I've spent three years perfecting is too long and can be shortened with a little revision. Just because most writers suffer from keyboard diarrhea, that doesn't mean I do.

Kitty said...

A few have said they’d like to mute politicians, which I can understand. But that could be a mistake. Everything a politician says and does is scripted, quite often leaving the rest of us with a false impression. Let them talk all they want because sometimes candidates entangle themselves irretrievably in a web of their own words. This was illustrated perfectly by Phil Donahue on his show back in the 1970s. This is an excerpt of a guest op-ed I wrote for USA Today, which was published in October of 1992:

On that particular show censorship was being discussed in regards to political campaigning. Phil showed the audience a political commercial made by a candidate running for a local office in a southern state. It was an amateurish production showing the white male candidate speaking directly into the camera. He was unabashedly a white supremacist who spared nothing in depicting blacks as inferior to whites in every way. He was a fear monger who pandered to the lowest segment of society by spewing the usual garbage which some people prefer to believe.

The audience was aghast at the commercial, and they overwhelmingly agreed that such filth should be banned. Then Donahue cleverly pointed out that had the voters NOT seen that commercial, had it been banned as the audience would have preferred, then it was quite possible the voters might never have realized the candidate's true character and consequently have voted him into office. As it was, that particular commercial was aired, the voters were informed, and the candidate lost.

Miles O'Neal said...

I would like to mute certain world leaders (there are quite a few) who love the spotlight. I think if they were well and truly muted, they'd all be carted off while pitching their silent temper tantrums.
Agreed on those who blame writers for things beyond their control, and I'd add writers who do things like issue 1 star reviews with abandon (especially those who get upset if they get any).
My socmed block/mute/etc. decisions are similar to Panda in Chief's.
Who wants to mute me? I know a few people have because I didn't toe whatever party line they thought I should toe... although in some case I gave up and muted them because I tired of their spewage.
Janet, I'll be blunt. In terms elder relatives in the deep south would have used, "Only a damnfool would mute you."
Julie, if you shovel snow naked, or even in a bikini, you can drop and roll in the snow every little while. That counts as showering.

Oops. Over the 100 word limit again.