Monday, November 07, 2011
Did you go to Backspace? Got 'em!!
Found him! 30 minutes start to finish! Thanks for everyone who helped out!
Did you go to Backspace last weekend?
Did you talk to Brooks Sherman about: a hitman who happens to be an incubus. The problem is, his manner of killing always leaves the victim appearing to have expired from natural causes, so he's not getting paid for his jobs.
Brooks is looking for you. He wants you to email the manuscript.
Given my history with tracking down errant queriers, I suggest you do so.
And if any of you blog readers know this guy, give him a shout!
Hit me with your best pitch if you want to get to first base
A blog post about platform here elicited some questions. Here's one from Loretta Ross (remember her name; you're going to know her as an amazing writer one of these days.)
How about this one, Janet? I have a friend who, as a teenager in the mid fifties and early sixties, worked as a batboy (and scoreboard operator and all-around-gopher) for the New York Yankees. He still has tons of memorabilia and all kinds of great stories about things that happened on and off field. Assuming that I can get him to stop *talking* about writing a book about it and get him to actually sit down and *write* the damn thing, how much of a platform would he need before pitching something like that?
(Seriously, sometimes I just want to duct tape him to a chair and say, "look, just tell ME your stories and I'LL write it for you!")
He doesn't need much platform--the Yankees have platform enough for everyone.
But, what he needs is a book. "Great stories" are what grandpa tells at the dinner table. When everyone tells him he should write a book, sometimes he does, queries me, and can't understand why I don't fall all over myself to sign him right up.
My guess is hanging out with Yankees was amazing, and meeting Marilyn Monroe when she was married to Joe DiMaggio was amazing, and yoda yoda yoda all amazing that was. It's not new. It's fun to hear about Gramps being there, but if he's not MY Gramps, I'm less inclined to care.
What does make me care is if:
1. It reveals something previously unknown and hopefully horrifying: like the pitching lineup sacrificed goats in the locker room, or traded wives during the playoffs or something that will get people hot under the collar and reaching for their rolodex to call their lawyers.
2. The stories are attached to a motivational how-to book of some sort: Everything I know about agenting, I learned as a bat boy for the Yankees, etc.
This applies to most memoirs these days. I get a lot of queries from folks who have had some very interesting things happen to them, and understandably want to tell their story to an audience. That's all well and good but the question I have to ask is "who wants to listen to this and why." The answer they give is largely why they want to tell the story, not why anyone would want to hear it. That's the trick with memoir.
I want to read something that will tell me something I didn't know, or teach me something I want to learn. Tell me that and you've got a book. Tell me they're great stories and I like to read great stories and you're missing the pitch.
How about this one, Janet? I have a friend who, as a teenager in the mid fifties and early sixties, worked as a batboy (and scoreboard operator and all-around-gopher) for the New York Yankees. He still has tons of memorabilia and all kinds of great stories about things that happened on and off field. Assuming that I can get him to stop *talking* about writing a book about it and get him to actually sit down and *write* the damn thing, how much of a platform would he need before pitching something like that?
(Seriously, sometimes I just want to duct tape him to a chair and say, "look, just tell ME your stories and I'LL write it for you!")
He doesn't need much platform--the Yankees have platform enough for everyone.
But, what he needs is a book. "Great stories" are what grandpa tells at the dinner table. When everyone tells him he should write a book, sometimes he does, queries me, and can't understand why I don't fall all over myself to sign him right up.
My guess is hanging out with Yankees was amazing, and meeting Marilyn Monroe when she was married to Joe DiMaggio was amazing, and yoda yoda yoda all amazing that was. It's not new. It's fun to hear about Gramps being there, but if he's not MY Gramps, I'm less inclined to care.
What does make me care is if:
1. It reveals something previously unknown and hopefully horrifying: like the pitching lineup sacrificed goats in the locker room, or traded wives during the playoffs or something that will get people hot under the collar and reaching for their rolodex to call their lawyers.
2. The stories are attached to a motivational how-to book of some sort: Everything I know about agenting, I learned as a bat boy for the Yankees, etc.
This applies to most memoirs these days. I get a lot of queries from folks who have had some very interesting things happen to them, and understandably want to tell their story to an audience. That's all well and good but the question I have to ask is "who wants to listen to this and why." The answer they give is largely why they want to tell the story, not why anyone would want to hear it. That's the trick with memoir.
I want to read something that will tell me something I didn't know, or teach me something I want to learn. Tell me that and you've got a book. Tell me they're great stories and I like to read great stories and you're missing the pitch.
Sunday, November 06, 2011
Results for the Something Amazing You'll Want to See Contest!
Clearly you all wanted me to see you are hilarious and talented. I am once again in awe of the talent displayed here!
Special recognition for writing a poem for her entry
Tara Tyler 11:26am
Special recognition for an individual line or lines that just wow'd me
BookishQua 5:07pm
"Her father’s truck grumbled in the driveway, shaking a gnarled fist at the bitter chill of the Maine morning."
Margaret Teisch-Williams 7:30pm
"these are the lies we hang in dark places when we don’t expect to see morning."
The entry that will make Gary Corby weep:
Carol Dance 5:09pm
Imaginative use of "rens"
Kitty 10:35am--"children's"
AngiNicole 2:08pm -- drag queens
Lines that just cracked me up:
Charley 10:02am
“It’s history! The Golden Fleece. The Silken Shawl with Silver Fringe. The Really Nice Cotton Jeans of Levi the Reckless.”
Mark 10:06am
“Hey now Liam, ‘argo,’ ‘ergo,’ I go where you go, you know that.”
cj 2:52pm
Genevieve Rens had the exhilarator peddle pressed to the floor
(now my guess is this is NOT what the writer intended, but in the spirit of DamnYou AutoCorrect, I just had to recognize its merit!)
Android Astronomer 3:50pm
“’Lather, rens, repeat.’”
andthatswhyImsingle.com 9:22am
It's unfortunate that the phrase ‘urine soaked’ is never associated with anything positive...I had that Jason/Argo/Golden fleece 'wet dream' once again-of course, not the good kind…
Two entries that just cracked me up;
Just Jan 8:50am
"Stupid book," I said, slamming my dictionary closed. "How am I supposed to know what 'rens' means?"
"Janet Reid having another contest?" my husband asked.
"The countdown began yesterday. Only a couple of hours left." My eyes flicked over the word list. "Argo's a noble gas, isn't it?"
"You're thinking of argon."
"Right." I pulled out Tom Sawyer. "Maybe I can use 'truck' like Aunt Polly did in Chapter One."
"Twain's definitely on the fringe there. I wouldn't recommend mimicking him."
"But he's a genius!"
"Ninety-nine percent perspiration, remember? Keep trying, dear. Something amazing is bound to happen."
Judith Gonda 7:05pm
The ransom note led us to an office on the fringe of downtown, on Rens Street.
I sat in the truck for a couple of minutes figuring out our next move.
Ted broke the silence.
“Maybe we should show the note to the cops, let them deal.”
“Too late,” I said. “The countdown has started, I’m going in.”
We walked into the office, no one was around, but the computer was on.
I reread the note.
“It says to press the ESC key and then enter Argo.”
“ESC Argo? I thought that was an appetizer, not an entrée.”
"Stop wasting time, Snail Male, just do it."
Predictions about the something amazing:
Charley 10:02am
a full-size reproduction of the original Argo? Or tickets to the Harlem Globetrotters (since the Rens aren’t around anymore)? Or, ok, getting serious, perhaps your critique of our stunningly good (or maybe quite the opposite) query letter?
Kregger 10:14am
Gary Corby’s imminent release of Ionia Sanction and please do not call me Shirley.
Cynthia Ivers 1:46pm
Marine scientists have discovered a new breed of shark off of New York's coastline and have named it Reid shark
Rosalind Smith-Nazilli 2:18pm
the new 'Argo' movie directed by Ben Affleck and written by George Clooney?
Cj 2:52pm
Is the something the amazing Q or Suzie?
Michelle 3:17pm
Argo tickets or a signed copy of the Pericles Commission.
wordencounters 3:28pm
an excerpt from "The Ionia Sanction".
adelaida 7:03pm
Aussie author and his agent will celebrate on November 8.
Marie Rearden 9:39pm
Did you make an amazing sale? Is that the Something Amazing? Possibly a new client? :)
Kristen Smith 10:49pm
* Something I would find amazing and would love to see is a photo of you cuddling The Rental Cat like a baby and handfeeding him kibble.
Kate Higgins 12:31am
I guess that 'something amazing' is a trip to see Greece with Gary Corby. Hey, I can dream...
Or it might be an arc ot the sctual book:"The Iona Sanction".
Here are the finalists:
Swift Scribble 10:01am
She marks the calendar. The countdown to the end, though no one knows it but her. She finally learned her lesson.
She was lobotomized for predicting the Great Depression, burned for suggesting the plague. When she warned the crew of the Argo that Apollo…she lets that thought die. Just his name makes her shudder. It’s his fault she’s lived dozen lifetimes, all of them wasted on the fringes as a mad woman.
But not this time. This time, as Rens unloads her truck of apocalyptic supplies, Cassandra keeps her mouth shut.
Well, almost. She offers to pay him double.
Tomorrow.
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
Charley 10:02am
“But it’s the Argo!”
“Sorry, Jason. Too many shark bites.”
“It’s history! The Golden Fleece. The Silken Shawl with Silver Fringe. The Really Nice Cotton Jeans of Levi the Reckless.”
“Can’t trade it for a yacht. Ain’t worth it.”
“A car, then. A Bentley—”
“No.”
“Mercedes?”
“I’ll give you a truck.”
“A Mack?”
“A pickup. There.”
“What?! That’s older than the New York Rens!”
“Take it or leave it.”
“No way. Give me—”
“Three.”
“Look, it’s Argo! It’s amazing!”
“Two.”
“You’re kidding. A countdown?”
“One.”
“OK!”
“Gas is extra. Still got that Fleece?”
“I been fleeced enough. I’m outa here.”
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
Sarah W 10:59am
Gramps says the game’s gone to hell since the 1939 New York Rens slammed the Celtics in the countdown. Since five black men in a Harlem ballroom with gold fringe on the drapes first showed the world how to put a ball through a hoop.
I tell him Franklin Argo could be the best since Tarzan Cooper -- maybe even Fats Jenkins.
But Gramps don’t truck with the players today. “They tall,” he says. “Some of ‘em fast. They want respect for being loud ‘n proud, but can they earn it for playing the damn game?”
I’m sure gonna try.
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
Marie Rearden 9:39pm
Three minutes.
I traced the stars from bow to mast to crow’s nest. Sammy twined our fingers to stop mine from shaking.
“It’s Argo, Nat. Sailing the fringe of the galaxy.”
Two minutes.
I choked on my tears as they dissolved into the hospital’s rooftop, amazed my nine-year-old sister remembered that story.
Sammy grinned and nudged me with her sunken shoulder. “Should’ve rented a truck instead.”
One minute.
She was comforting me. Me?! Sammy had rens in high supply. I dared my sobs to ruin our last moment.
“More like a plane. Right?”
No answer.
“Right?”
The countdown was done.
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
Curtis Edmonds 11:10pm
My wife and I were cleaning out her dead Uncle Lyndon’s house. He’d spent years building a quarter-scale replica of the sailing ship HMS ARGO. It took us three hours to load it on the truck.
“He must have been a little weird,” I said.
“On the fringe, maybe. He did spend all that time running that Resident Evil Network Server.”
“The RENS? That was him?”
“Yeah.” She poked at a pile of trash. “Hey, look, it’s a cassingle.” It was a Europe song, The Final Countdown.
“Weird.”
“Just keep looking,” she said. “That falcon is here somewhere. I’m sure.”
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
Terri Lynn Coop 11:48pm
I waited at the Flatiron Argo Tea as instructed. I wondered which tea swilling yuppie was my contact. Turns out she was sexy with fanatical eyes under a fringe of bangs.
“I like Ten Ren’s Jasmine,” she said, and we did the delicate verbal dance of verification.
Satisfied, she gave me an envelope. After a peek at the smiling Benjamins, I surrendered the portfolio.
Her smile vanished. “You’re under arrest.” Outside I saw NYPD exiting a bakery truck.
“Officer, my assignment was to find the infiltrator. Good meeting you,” I said, clicking the cellphone button that started the ten-second countdown.
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
Kate Outhwaite 5:02am
“Argo! (The Musical)” was destined to be the hit of the 1985 Edinburgh Fringe Festival. Christopher (Jason, An Argonaut), James (other males), Rens (auteur) and I (women) knew it as we rattled north in James’s VW Beetle, our countdown to fortune clicking past with every mile.
Sandwiched in the back between rucksacks and Christopher, I yearned to touch Rens. Rens was mature (23!), exotic (Dutch parents!) and, as I found out as we waited for the breakdown truck, madly in love (with Christopher).
The show flopped but James and I have been married 23 years now. (He had a car.)
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
Kelly 9:58pm
Untrained eyes would see lawn chair cushions in front of a couch. I know better.
“Permission to board?”
Her head pops through the pile. She shovels the fringe of bangs out of her eyes. I really need to trim those.
“The countdown’s starting and the Argo waits for no one. You’re just in time!”
“Thank goodness! Where are we going today?”
“Rens.”
“Where?”
She sighs heavily. “Denmark.” Where does she learn these things? “And we’re gonna have to truck if we’re gonna stop the evil Lord Latimer from stealing all the Danishes.”
“Pastries or people?”
There’s a short pause. “Both.”
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
The decision was very difficult. You're making me gnaw my fins here! But, after reading the entries several times, the winner is:
And for the news about Something Amazing, well, that's part of the prize.
Something Amazing You'll Want to See is the reveal of the cover for
She didn’t see it coming--
A truck that came out of nowhere.
A boy with the power to restore life.
A countdown to the end of the world.
--until it was too late.
Yes, you want this book.
And the prize for this contest, lucky Kate!, is a hot off the press, Advanced Reader copy, signed by Liz Norris herself, of UNRAVELING.
The word prompts were all related to UNRAVELING:
countdown: "Stop the countdown, save the world" is on the cover
truck: "A truck that came out of nowhere."
fringe: UNRAVELING was pitched as "Before I Fall meets Fringe"
argo: Liz Norris is addicted to Argo Tea
rens: I really confuzzled y'all on this one to my utter delight. Kristin Rens is the editor for UNRAVELING and she is just the cat's pjs.
Thanks to all who entered, congratulations to all the honorees, and special kudos to Kate Outhwaite (and Kate, if you'll email me your mailing address we'll get your prize out to you!)
Special recognition for writing a poem for her entry
Tara Tyler 11:26am
Special recognition for an individual line or lines that just wow'd me
BookishQua 5:07pm
"Her father’s truck grumbled in the driveway, shaking a gnarled fist at the bitter chill of the Maine morning."
Margaret Teisch-Williams 7:30pm
"these are the lies we hang in dark places when we don’t expect to see morning."
The entry that will make Gary Corby weep:
Carol Dance 5:09pm
Imaginative use of "rens"
Kitty 10:35am--"children's"
AngiNicole 2:08pm -- drag queens
Lines that just cracked me up:
Charley 10:02am
“It’s history! The Golden Fleece. The Silken Shawl with Silver Fringe. The Really Nice Cotton Jeans of Levi the Reckless.”
Mark 10:06am
“Hey now Liam, ‘argo,’ ‘ergo,’ I go where you go, you know that.”
cj 2:52pm
Genevieve Rens had the exhilarator peddle pressed to the floor
(now my guess is this is NOT what the writer intended, but in the spirit of DamnYou AutoCorrect, I just had to recognize its merit!)
Android Astronomer 3:50pm
“’Lather, rens, repeat.’”
andthatswhyImsingle.com 9:22am
It's unfortunate that the phrase ‘urine soaked’ is never associated with anything positive...I had that Jason/Argo/Golden fleece 'wet dream' once again-of course, not the good kind…
Two entries that just cracked me up;
Just Jan 8:50am
"Stupid book," I said, slamming my dictionary closed. "How am I supposed to know what 'rens' means?"
"Janet Reid having another contest?" my husband asked.
"The countdown began yesterday. Only a couple of hours left." My eyes flicked over the word list. "Argo's a noble gas, isn't it?"
"You're thinking of argon."
"Right." I pulled out Tom Sawyer. "Maybe I can use 'truck' like Aunt Polly did in Chapter One."
"Twain's definitely on the fringe there. I wouldn't recommend mimicking him."
"But he's a genius!"
"Ninety-nine percent perspiration, remember? Keep trying, dear. Something amazing is bound to happen."
Judith Gonda 7:05pm
The ransom note led us to an office on the fringe of downtown, on Rens Street.
I sat in the truck for a couple of minutes figuring out our next move.
Ted broke the silence.
“Maybe we should show the note to the cops, let them deal.”
“Too late,” I said. “The countdown has started, I’m going in.”
We walked into the office, no one was around, but the computer was on.
I reread the note.
“It says to press the ESC key and then enter Argo.”
“ESC Argo? I thought that was an appetizer, not an entrée.”
"Stop wasting time, Snail Male, just do it."
Predictions about the something amazing:
Charley 10:02am
a full-size reproduction of the original Argo? Or tickets to the Harlem Globetrotters (since the Rens aren’t around anymore)? Or, ok, getting serious, perhaps your critique of our stunningly good (or maybe quite the opposite) query letter?
Kregger 10:14am
Gary Corby’s imminent release of Ionia Sanction and please do not call me Shirley.
Cynthia Ivers 1:46pm
Marine scientists have discovered a new breed of shark off of New York's coastline and have named it Reid shark
Rosalind Smith-Nazilli 2:18pm
the new 'Argo' movie directed by Ben Affleck and written by George Clooney?
Cj 2:52pm
Is the something the amazing Q or Suzie?
Michelle 3:17pm
Argo tickets or a signed copy of the Pericles Commission.
wordencounters 3:28pm
an excerpt from "The Ionia Sanction".
adelaida 7:03pm
Aussie author and his agent will celebrate on November 8.
Marie Rearden 9:39pm
Did you make an amazing sale? Is that the Something Amazing? Possibly a new client? :)
Kristen Smith 10:49pm
* Something I would find amazing and would love to see is a photo of you cuddling The Rental Cat like a baby and handfeeding him kibble.
 |
| The Rental Cat. Cuddle at your own risk! |
Kate Higgins 12:31am
I guess that 'something amazing' is a trip to see Greece with Gary Corby. Hey, I can dream...
Or it might be an arc ot the sctual book:"The Iona Sanction".
Here are the finalists:
Swift Scribble 10:01am
She marks the calendar. The countdown to the end, though no one knows it but her. She finally learned her lesson.
She was lobotomized for predicting the Great Depression, burned for suggesting the plague. When she warned the crew of the Argo that Apollo…she lets that thought die. Just his name makes her shudder. It’s his fault she’s lived dozen lifetimes, all of them wasted on the fringes as a mad woman.
But not this time. This time, as Rens unloads her truck of apocalyptic supplies, Cassandra keeps her mouth shut.
Well, almost. She offers to pay him double.
Tomorrow.
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
Charley 10:02am
“But it’s the Argo!”
“Sorry, Jason. Too many shark bites.”
“It’s history! The Golden Fleece. The Silken Shawl with Silver Fringe. The Really Nice Cotton Jeans of Levi the Reckless.”
“Can’t trade it for a yacht. Ain’t worth it.”
“A car, then. A Bentley—”
“No.”
“Mercedes?”
“I’ll give you a truck.”
“A Mack?”
“A pickup. There.”
“What?! That’s older than the New York Rens!”
“Take it or leave it.”
“No way. Give me—”
“Three.”
“Look, it’s Argo! It’s amazing!”
“Two.”
“You’re kidding. A countdown?”
“One.”
“OK!”
“Gas is extra. Still got that Fleece?”
“I been fleeced enough. I’m outa here.”
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
Sarah W 10:59am
Gramps says the game’s gone to hell since the 1939 New York Rens slammed the Celtics in the countdown. Since five black men in a Harlem ballroom with gold fringe on the drapes first showed the world how to put a ball through a hoop.
I tell him Franklin Argo could be the best since Tarzan Cooper -- maybe even Fats Jenkins.
But Gramps don’t truck with the players today. “They tall,” he says. “Some of ‘em fast. They want respect for being loud ‘n proud, but can they earn it for playing the damn game?”
I’m sure gonna try.
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
Marie Rearden 9:39pm
Three minutes.
I traced the stars from bow to mast to crow’s nest. Sammy twined our fingers to stop mine from shaking.
“It’s Argo, Nat. Sailing the fringe of the galaxy.”
Two minutes.
I choked on my tears as they dissolved into the hospital’s rooftop, amazed my nine-year-old sister remembered that story.
Sammy grinned and nudged me with her sunken shoulder. “Should’ve rented a truck instead.”
One minute.
She was comforting me. Me?! Sammy had rens in high supply. I dared my sobs to ruin our last moment.
“More like a plane. Right?”
No answer.
“Right?”
The countdown was done.
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
Curtis Edmonds 11:10pm
My wife and I were cleaning out her dead Uncle Lyndon’s house. He’d spent years building a quarter-scale replica of the sailing ship HMS ARGO. It took us three hours to load it on the truck.
“He must have been a little weird,” I said.
“On the fringe, maybe. He did spend all that time running that Resident Evil Network Server.”
“The RENS? That was him?”
“Yeah.” She poked at a pile of trash. “Hey, look, it’s a cassingle.” It was a Europe song, The Final Countdown.
“Weird.”
“Just keep looking,” she said. “That falcon is here somewhere. I’m sure.”
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
Terri Lynn Coop 11:48pm
I waited at the Flatiron Argo Tea as instructed. I wondered which tea swilling yuppie was my contact. Turns out she was sexy with fanatical eyes under a fringe of bangs.
“I like Ten Ren’s Jasmine,” she said, and we did the delicate verbal dance of verification.
Satisfied, she gave me an envelope. After a peek at the smiling Benjamins, I surrendered the portfolio.
Her smile vanished. “You’re under arrest.” Outside I saw NYPD exiting a bakery truck.
“Officer, my assignment was to find the infiltrator. Good meeting you,” I said, clicking the cellphone button that started the ten-second countdown.
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
Kate Outhwaite 5:02am
“Argo! (The Musical)” was destined to be the hit of the 1985 Edinburgh Fringe Festival. Christopher (Jason, An Argonaut), James (other males), Rens (auteur) and I (women) knew it as we rattled north in James’s VW Beetle, our countdown to fortune clicking past with every mile.
Sandwiched in the back between rucksacks and Christopher, I yearned to touch Rens. Rens was mature (23!), exotic (Dutch parents!) and, as I found out as we waited for the breakdown truck, madly in love (with Christopher).
The show flopped but James and I have been married 23 years now. (He had a car.)
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
Kelly 9:58pm
Untrained eyes would see lawn chair cushions in front of a couch. I know better.
“Permission to board?”
Her head pops through the pile. She shovels the fringe of bangs out of her eyes. I really need to trim those.
“The countdown’s starting and the Argo waits for no one. You’re just in time!”
“Thank goodness! Where are we going today?”
“Rens.”
“Where?”
She sighs heavily. “Denmark.” Where does she learn these things? “And we’re gonna have to truck if we’re gonna stop the evil Lord Latimer from stealing all the Danishes.”
“Pastries or people?”
There’s a short pause. “Both.”
~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~ ~~~~^~~~~
The decision was very difficult. You're making me gnaw my fins here! But, after reading the entries several times, the winner is:
Kate Outhwaite 5:02am
And for the news about Something Amazing, well, that's part of the prize.
Something Amazing You'll Want to See is the reveal of the cover for
UNRAVELING by Elizabeth Norris
She didn’t see it coming--
A truck that came out of nowhere.
A boy with the power to restore life.
A countdown to the end of the world.
--until it was too late.
Yes, you want this book.
And the prize for this contest, lucky Kate!, is a hot off the press, Advanced Reader copy, signed by Liz Norris herself, of UNRAVELING.
The word prompts were all related to UNRAVELING:
countdown: "Stop the countdown, save the world" is on the cover
truck: "A truck that came out of nowhere."
fringe: UNRAVELING was pitched as "Before I Fall meets Fringe"
argo: Liz Norris is addicted to Argo Tea
rens: I really confuzzled y'all on this one to my utter delight. Kristin Rens is the editor for UNRAVELING and she is just the cat's pjs.
Thanks to all who entered, congratulations to all the honorees, and special kudos to Kate Outhwaite (and Kate, if you'll email me your mailing address we'll get your prize out to you!)
Friday, November 04, 2011
The Amazing Something You'll Want to See Contest!
No better way to show you Something Amazing than having a contest to celebrate the announcement!
Bonus points if you guess what the Something Amazing is!
Usual rules: Write a story using 100 words or fewer. Post in the comment column of this blog. One entry per person. If you need a mulligan, delete and reenter.
Use these words in the story:
countdown
truck
fringe
argo
rens
Contest opens at 10am Saturday 11/5 and closes 10am Sunday 11/6. All times are Eastern Shark time.
Ready?
Set?
Wait till the contest opens!
WRITE!
Bonus points if you guess what the Something Amazing is!
Usual rules: Write a story using 100 words or fewer. Post in the comment column of this blog. One entry per person. If you need a mulligan, delete and reenter.
Use these words in the story:
countdown
truck
fringe
argo
rens
Contest opens at 10am Saturday 11/5 and closes 10am Sunday 11/6. All times are Eastern Shark time.
Ready?
Set?
WRITE!
Thursday, November 03, 2011
Today's Query Pitfall
I recently received a query from an writer who included five projects in his email pitch. His opening line was "First, let me apologize for not following the guidelines."
Everyone who reads this blog will not be surprised to know that was probably not the most effective way to get me to read more. But I did. It was a slow day.
The problem with trying to pitch too much is space. You know how hard it is to make a novel sound enticing when you have 250 words. It's five times harder if you're trying to do it in 50.
And the querier wanted me to look at each project and decide which one should be first priority.
Well, no.
There are two possible responses to a query: no and send more.
I don't undertake career guidance (which is what prioritizing projects is) for anyone BUT already signed clients. Most agents don't either. It's not an effective use of our time.
At this stage, you pick the project you think is strongest, and you pitch it. I'll say yes or no. You can pitch all five projects, you just have to do them one at a time. This may seem inefficient from your side of the matter, but it does not from mine.
And just a hint: if you're not going to follow the guidelines, at the very least, don't announce it up front.
Everyone who reads this blog will not be surprised to know that was probably not the most effective way to get me to read more. But I did. It was a slow day.
The problem with trying to pitch too much is space. You know how hard it is to make a novel sound enticing when you have 250 words. It's five times harder if you're trying to do it in 50.
And the querier wanted me to look at each project and decide which one should be first priority.
Well, no.
There are two possible responses to a query: no and send more.
I don't undertake career guidance (which is what prioritizing projects is) for anyone BUT already signed clients. Most agents don't either. It's not an effective use of our time.
At this stage, you pick the project you think is strongest, and you pitch it. I'll say yes or no. You can pitch all five projects, you just have to do them one at a time. This may seem inefficient from your side of the matter, but it does not from mine.
And just a hint: if you're not going to follow the guidelines, at the very least, don't announce it up front.
Wednesday, November 02, 2011
Ok, Boston, we can be friends again
I have forsworn visiting Boston since 2008. Details of those two trips are here and here
When I swooped in for CrimeBake in 2009 and 2010, I got off the train at Rte128 and never ventured out of the hotel. I was certain Boston had it in for me.
Today however I am back!
The reason I'm here, and the reason I may declare an end to my war with Boston is the Massachusetts Historical Society. If you're in the Boston area and you're not regularly attending their events, you're really missing out.
Tonight was a talk by Vincent Carretta on his new book PHILLIS WHEATLEY. Now, I'm sure you know Phillis Wheatley was an American poet working at the time of the American Revolution. You may remember she was the first person of African descent to be published in the Americas. You probably read some of her work in various anthologies in your American lit classes.
But did you know she was seven years old when she was taken from her home in Africa and sold in Boston? Did you know her name Phillis is that of the ship she arrived on, and her surname Wheatley is that of the family who owned her. I didn't.
That she was taught to read and write, that she was able to secure her freedom, those were all incredible feats in the 18th century. That she is a poet of amazing depth...well that's an incredible feat in every century.
And tonight, at no charge, the Massachusetts Historical Society sponsored a talk by the author of the first full biography of Phillis Wheatley, a book they also supported with grants. Of course I made the trip to attend.
The MHS is sponsoring several other talks about the craft of biography that I will also be attending. Check out their website for the details about the New England Biography Seminar
And while you're at it: check out PHILLIS WHEATLEY.
When I swooped in for CrimeBake in 2009 and 2010, I got off the train at Rte128 and never ventured out of the hotel. I was certain Boston had it in for me.
Today however I am back!
The reason I'm here, and the reason I may declare an end to my war with Boston is the Massachusetts Historical Society. If you're in the Boston area and you're not regularly attending their events, you're really missing out.
Tonight was a talk by Vincent Carretta on his new book PHILLIS WHEATLEY. Now, I'm sure you know Phillis Wheatley was an American poet working at the time of the American Revolution. You may remember she was the first person of African descent to be published in the Americas. You probably read some of her work in various anthologies in your American lit classes.
But did you know she was seven years old when she was taken from her home in Africa and sold in Boston? Did you know her name Phillis is that of the ship she arrived on, and her surname Wheatley is that of the family who owned her. I didn't.
That she was taught to read and write, that she was able to secure her freedom, those were all incredible feats in the 18th century. That she is a poet of amazing depth...well that's an incredible feat in every century.
And tonight, at no charge, the Massachusetts Historical Society sponsored a talk by the author of the first full biography of Phillis Wheatley, a book they also supported with grants. Of course I made the trip to attend.
The MHS is sponsoring several other talks about the craft of biography that I will also be attending. Check out their website for the details about the New England Biography Seminar
And while you're at it: check out PHILLIS WHEATLEY.
More on platform
A commenter on my recent post about a querier who assumed I was stupid cause I didn't understand his explanation asked "what does how to reach the market (platform) mean?"
First, this applies ONLY to non-fiction. You do NOT need platform for a novel. It doesn't hurt if you can reach thousands of people, but when I consider novels for representation, platform isn't much of a factor and certainly not the first.
For some categories of non-fiction, platform is the FIRST factor. More than writing, almost more than a good concept, platform is what I look for. Platform is the reason Snooki has a novel and Madonna has a picture book (which is contrary to what I said in the paragraph above, but we're talking about you, not celebrities)--people know who they are already.
Platform is how people know you, and why they will pay attention to you. If I were to write a book about query letters my platform is a blog with X! readers/followers, and Y! Twitter followers. In other words, people already know I am an agent, and I can speak with authority on that topic.
Platform (as we see with Snooki and Madonna) is transferable. I can write a novel and use my platform to reach potential readers. There's less correlation though: readers of this blog aren't here for my deathless prose, they're here for insight on how the agent part of publishing actually works. (And the pictures of sharks of course.)
What platform is NOT: "lots of people need this book" "every person who has children will want to read this book" "I will go on Oprah."
All of those may be true, but they are NOT how people know you NOW.
There are some excellent resources on how to build platform.
GET KNOWN BEFORE THE BOOK DEAL by Christina Katz is first on my must-have list for authors.
You can start to build platform before you have a book. In fact, you should. You cannot tell me "I'll build a platform" if you're querying for non-fiction. You must have it in place. I will verify it's there before I reply to your query. A blog with 100 followers, and a Twitter feed with 500 isn't platform.
There are some exceptions to this: history comes to mind. If you're writing about a shipwreck in 1736, you won't need much platform. If you're writing true crime, you won't need much of a platform: the notoriety of the crime does that job.
You need platform when you're presenting yourself or your book as an authority on a topic. If you're going to write about politics, you must have platform. Everyone's got an opinion on political topics, who will pay attention to yours? (Answer: people who read your tweets and follow your blog and read your articles in The Atlantic.)
Does this help?
Platform is a sneaky thing.
Ask questions in the comment column. I'll try to answer.
First, this applies ONLY to non-fiction. You do NOT need platform for a novel. It doesn't hurt if you can reach thousands of people, but when I consider novels for representation, platform isn't much of a factor and certainly not the first.
For some categories of non-fiction, platform is the FIRST factor. More than writing, almost more than a good concept, platform is what I look for. Platform is the reason Snooki has a novel and Madonna has a picture book (which is contrary to what I said in the paragraph above, but we're talking about you, not celebrities)--people know who they are already.
Platform is how people know you, and why they will pay attention to you. If I were to write a book about query letters my platform is a blog with X! readers/followers, and Y! Twitter followers. In other words, people already know I am an agent, and I can speak with authority on that topic.
Platform (as we see with Snooki and Madonna) is transferable. I can write a novel and use my platform to reach potential readers. There's less correlation though: readers of this blog aren't here for my deathless prose, they're here for insight on how the agent part of publishing actually works. (And the pictures of sharks of course.)
What platform is NOT: "lots of people need this book" "every person who has children will want to read this book" "I will go on Oprah."
All of those may be true, but they are NOT how people know you NOW.
There are some excellent resources on how to build platform.
GET KNOWN BEFORE THE BOOK DEAL by Christina Katz is first on my must-have list for authors.
You can start to build platform before you have a book. In fact, you should. You cannot tell me "I'll build a platform" if you're querying for non-fiction. You must have it in place. I will verify it's there before I reply to your query. A blog with 100 followers, and a Twitter feed with 500 isn't platform.
There are some exceptions to this: history comes to mind. If you're writing about a shipwreck in 1736, you won't need much platform. If you're writing true crime, you won't need much of a platform: the notoriety of the crime does that job.
You need platform when you're presenting yourself or your book as an authority on a topic. If you're going to write about politics, you must have platform. Everyone's got an opinion on political topics, who will pay attention to yours? (Answer: people who read your tweets and follow your blog and read your articles in The Atlantic.)
Does this help?
Platform is a sneaky thing.
Ask questions in the comment column. I'll try to answer.
Tuesday, November 01, 2011
The best communication tool I ever learned was in math class
And of course, it wasn't about math at all.
Now, I love math. I love its elegance. I love its clean form. I love that there is one right answer, and I love that there's not much room for opinion. It's either right or wrong. (That tells you a lot about me of course, but nothing I didn't already know to my rueful dismay--but I digress)
The best teacher I ever had was a math teacher in college. He was a graduate student. Most likely he hated us undergraduates who were there to get our science requirements satisfied. He was teaching the second term, geometry, of a three term, year long sequence.
Here's why he was great: he'd write a problem on the board. Then he'd show us how to solve it. He'd explain the guiding principle of the solution.
Then he'd ask us if we understood.
All you had to do, IF you understood, was nod your head.
The trick was, if you DIDN'T understand you could just sit there, looking befuddled.
Or confused.
And he'd explain it again. In a different way. Sometimes with a different problem, or a different graph or drawing.
Then he'd ask us again if we understood, and again, all we had to do was nod.
Most of the easy stuff we got right away. More complicated stuff took two, or even three explanations. And even if I thought I understood on the first pass, those second times usually helped cement the concept.
I learned a lot of geometry that term. But I learned something more important: If what I was saying didn't make sense to people listening it wasn't their fault. It wasn't my fault either, exactly, but as the teacher, my job was to explain it, not make people feel stupid for not getting it.
I was reminded of this recently when, in a fit of madness, I replied to a query letter about a non-fiction book. I explained I needed a couple of things to evaluate a proposal (things not included in his initial query.) One key thing was how to reach the market (platform.)
The query writer wrote back telling me about the size of the market.
I wrote back explaining it wasn't the size of the market, but how to reach the market that I was concerned with.
At this point the querier dropped the ball. He wrote back telling me my assistant should read the query so as to explain it to me. The implication was that clearly I was too stupid to see what he had explained so clearly.
Well, OK, my assistant IS very bright, and I do depend on her to explain a lot of bewildering things to me (most recent explanations: famous tattoo artists, and drummers) but generally I do know what I'm talking about when the subject is query letters and platform.
This query writer made the same mistake a lot of people do: if I didn't understand what he was writing, I was stupid.
I failed in my effort to communicate what I needed to this querier, but in dismissing me as stupid he ended my willingness to explain a third time using a different example. Don't close down communication by dismissing the person who doesn't get what you're saying until you've tried at least three times.
That applies to your beta readers, your query critiquers and anyone else giving you feedback. "You're wrong" shuts down the process. "Let me try again" gives you another shot.
Be smart. Don't assume I'm stupid.
Now, I love math. I love its elegance. I love its clean form. I love that there is one right answer, and I love that there's not much room for opinion. It's either right or wrong. (That tells you a lot about me of course, but nothing I didn't already know to my rueful dismay--but I digress)
The best teacher I ever had was a math teacher in college. He was a graduate student. Most likely he hated us undergraduates who were there to get our science requirements satisfied. He was teaching the second term, geometry, of a three term, year long sequence.
Here's why he was great: he'd write a problem on the board. Then he'd show us how to solve it. He'd explain the guiding principle of the solution.
Then he'd ask us if we understood.
All you had to do, IF you understood, was nod your head.
The trick was, if you DIDN'T understand you could just sit there, looking befuddled.
Or confused.
And he'd explain it again. In a different way. Sometimes with a different problem, or a different graph or drawing.
Then he'd ask us again if we understood, and again, all we had to do was nod.
Most of the easy stuff we got right away. More complicated stuff took two, or even three explanations. And even if I thought I understood on the first pass, those second times usually helped cement the concept.
I learned a lot of geometry that term. But I learned something more important: If what I was saying didn't make sense to people listening it wasn't their fault. It wasn't my fault either, exactly, but as the teacher, my job was to explain it, not make people feel stupid for not getting it.
I was reminded of this recently when, in a fit of madness, I replied to a query letter about a non-fiction book. I explained I needed a couple of things to evaluate a proposal (things not included in his initial query.) One key thing was how to reach the market (platform.)
The query writer wrote back telling me about the size of the market.
I wrote back explaining it wasn't the size of the market, but how to reach the market that I was concerned with.
At this point the querier dropped the ball. He wrote back telling me my assistant should read the query so as to explain it to me. The implication was that clearly I was too stupid to see what he had explained so clearly.
Well, OK, my assistant IS very bright, and I do depend on her to explain a lot of bewildering things to me (most recent explanations: famous tattoo artists, and drummers) but generally I do know what I'm talking about when the subject is query letters and platform.
This query writer made the same mistake a lot of people do: if I didn't understand what he was writing, I was stupid.
I failed in my effort to communicate what I needed to this querier, but in dismissing me as stupid he ended my willingness to explain a third time using a different example. Don't close down communication by dismissing the person who doesn't get what you're saying until you've tried at least three times.
That applies to your beta readers, your query critiquers and anyone else giving you feedback. "You're wrong" shuts down the process. "Let me try again" gives you another shot.
Be smart. Don't assume I'm stupid.
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