iSad indeed

last image was found here

I'm forwarding all queries for "fictional novels" to

my dear friend and colleague Katharine Sands

She's assured me she knows exactly how to respond.

I ♥ Joelle Anthony

The poem contest gets mentioned at the very end of her speech here (but honestly the whole video is utterly charming and worth all 8minutes of viewing)

one of the MANY things I love about Jack Reacher novels

Lee Child has a deft way of writing about women. It's not an easy task, I'm convinced, for men to write about women in a way that doesn't focus somehow first on their sexuality.

Lee Child does it better than most.

Here's what reminded me of that today:

She wound down her window and looked straight at me, first my face, then a careful up-and-down, side-to-side appraisal all the way from my shoes to my hair, with nothing but frankness in her gaze. I stepped in closer to give her a better look, and to take a better look. She was more than flawless. She was spectacular. She had a revolver in a holster on her right hip, and next to it was a shotgun stuffed muzzle-down in a scabbard mounted between the seats. There was a big radio slung under the dash on the passenger side and a microphone on a curly wire in a clip near the steering wheel. The car was old and worn, almost certainly bought secondhand from a richer municipality.

So, you know a lot about this woman, without hearing a single thing about what she looks like. You know Reacher finds her very attractive. You know she's a cop. And you know she's armed. Any questions? Yea,  I didn't think so.

AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

"I am seeking representation for my novel, a completed Non-Fiction Romantic Crime Drama."


Even if your novel observes the laws of gravity, and respects the laws of physics you do not ever say your novel is non-fiction. Many things in a novel may be true. That does not make it non-fiction.

A "non-fiction novel" is narrative non-fiction. You'll see "non-fiction novel" used to describe early works in this category; IN COLD BLOOD is a classic example.

But now, and forever onward, here's the rule:

1. Novels are fiction by definition. (no fiction novels much like there is no presidential president)

2. Non-fiction with a narrative arc, and a riproaring good story is  "narrative non-fiction."

3. If you don't observe this rule, I will arrange for my non-fictional flying monkeys to visit you.

please NO

"fictional manuscript"
"fictional novelist"
"fictional query"

These phrases make me reach for the bourbon bottle at 10am.
If you want to be a writer, you really have to know what "fictional" means.

Until you do, your agent will be.