Wednesday, July 07, 2010
Monday, July 05, 2010
This stunned me
I've been in and around water my entire life; years on swim teams, splashing in three oceans, countless lakes, and many rivers.
This article about drowning floored me. Please read it. Please remember it.
This article about drowning floored me. Please read it. Please remember it.
Sunday, July 04, 2010
And we have a winner!
Reading these contest entries is a real guilty pleasure. Guilty because of course I should be reading your queries, but I'm not!
A lot of you had fun with what razzmatazz meant:
Lipstick (Amy 1:44pm)
Band name (Leslie 1:50)
danish! (Qraig 2:27pm)
White lightning! (MarissaV 3:10pm)
Hair color (Karin 4:55pm)
There were some hilarious uses of double agent:
A football double agent! (Joan 7:13pm)
A toddler double agent! (Erin 2:29pm)
There were some really great lines:
you look like RaggedyAnn: The Prostitute Years.” (Erin Kelly 2:28pm)
"You have to cut down on the coffee. Your hair is vibrating." (Lyra 1:01am)
"Sorry, dollface. I already promised your stuffing to Geppetto." (Dawn Simon 1:46am)
My tongue flickers. The air tastes like terror. I unhinge my jaw. (Maybe genius 4:30pm)
No contest is complete without an homage to FinePrint of course!
Katt 5:20pm
And no contest should be complete without an homage to Suzie Townsend
Catherine 7:36pm
My new favorite description of myself:
Tasmanian devil! (Myimaginaryblog 6:02pm)
These were horrifyingly hilarious
Dave 11:07am
The Precinct House Squad 4:40pm
There were some terrific entries that did get stories in 100 words:
Fanfreakingtastic Flower 8:02pm
Melissa Guernsey 1:32am
Themarie 7:38pm
Erin 2:29pm
Cat 3:20pm (shotgun or seam ripper!)
Tessa Quin 3:26pm
[soccerboy] 3:51pm
Mama Bear 4:03pm
Arbyn 7:06pm
Justwritecat 9:04pm
Cruella Collett 8:27am
Hilary 10:16am
Nancy Coffelt 11:06am
And here are the finalists:
Catcaller 5:02pm
"I'll never forgive Barbie!" cried Raggedy Ann, spilling coffee as the rest of the toys looked on. "Turned on that razzmatazz and stole my Andy."
"Now what?" asked T-Rex.
Rags zeroed in on Ken, re-decorating the Dream House. "You!"
Ken put the chaise down, shaking his head, “Keep her bony butt in Jersey, this is all mine now."
“It can be yours forever."
Ken straightened his ascot. "What did you have in mind?"
Rags grinned, "Pose as a double agent and convince her to come home.” She brandished a knife, "so I can get rid of that cheatin’ bitch for good."
Terri Coop 12:25pm
“Razzmatazz.”
“What?”
“The password is razzmatazz.”
“No it’s not. That’s yesterday’s password.”
“Crud. Can I borrow your codebook?”
Standing, I’d had enough.
“Sit down! Both of you, now,” I said.
“Okay class, what’s wrong with that?” I asked the group.
“Um, he didn’t know today’s code is RaggedyAnn?”
“The other guy didn’t shoot him for not knowing the code?”
I sighed. Recruiting double agents had gotten tougher since the end of the Cold War.
Sipping my coffee, I thought about how far I had fallen. Once the toast of the KGB, I now taught at the “Jersey School for Spies.”
Derek Whisman 3:49pm
The smell greeted me first in the kitchen. Something about the bra in the sink told me that it wasn't just coffee that was brewing.
"You raggedy--"
"Ann!" Mat screamed. He struggled to pull up his pants.
"You're home early," he tried to apologize as if that somehow excused it. Like my early day was to blame for him being a marital double agent with busty Jersey Miller from two houses down.
“You may want to get your bra, Jersey,” I pulled a rolling pin from a nearby drawer. “If you'll excuse us, I have to razz Mat azz.”
You can see from these three that it wasn't an easy decision.
By a whisker, the winner of the contest is Catcaller. Send me your mailing address and a copy of CONFESSIONS OF A FORMER CHILD will be winging its way to you soon!
Thanks to everyone who entered! This was fun!
A lot of you had fun with what razzmatazz meant:
Lipstick (Amy 1:44pm)
Band name (Leslie 1:50)
danish! (Qraig 2:27pm)
White lightning! (MarissaV 3:10pm)
Hair color (Karin 4:55pm)
There were some hilarious uses of double agent:
A football double agent! (Joan 7:13pm)
A toddler double agent! (Erin 2:29pm)
There were some really great lines:
you look like RaggedyAnn: The Prostitute Years.” (Erin Kelly 2:28pm)
"You have to cut down on the coffee. Your hair is vibrating." (Lyra 1:01am)
"Sorry, dollface. I already promised your stuffing to Geppetto." (Dawn Simon 1:46am)
My tongue flickers. The air tastes like terror. I unhinge my jaw. (Maybe genius 4:30pm)
No contest is complete without an homage to FinePrint of course!
Katt 5:20pm
And no contest should be complete without an homage to Suzie Townsend
Catherine 7:36pm
My new favorite description of myself:
Tasmanian devil! (Myimaginaryblog 6:02pm)
These were horrifyingly hilarious
Dave 11:07am
The Precinct House Squad 4:40pm
There were some terrific entries that did get stories in 100 words:
Fanfreakingtastic Flower 8:02pm
Melissa Guernsey 1:32am
Themarie 7:38pm
Erin 2:29pm
Cat 3:20pm (shotgun or seam ripper!)
Tessa Quin 3:26pm
[soccerboy] 3:51pm
Mama Bear 4:03pm
Arbyn 7:06pm
Justwritecat 9:04pm
Cruella Collett 8:27am
Hilary 10:16am
Nancy Coffelt 11:06am
And here are the finalists:
Catcaller 5:02pm
"I'll never forgive Barbie!" cried Raggedy Ann, spilling coffee as the rest of the toys looked on. "Turned on that razzmatazz and stole my Andy."
"Now what?" asked T-Rex.
Rags zeroed in on Ken, re-decorating the Dream House. "You!"
Ken put the chaise down, shaking his head, “Keep her bony butt in Jersey, this is all mine now."
“It can be yours forever."
Ken straightened his ascot. "What did you have in mind?"
Rags grinned, "Pose as a double agent and convince her to come home.” She brandished a knife, "so I can get rid of that cheatin’ bitch for good."
Terri Coop 12:25pm
“Razzmatazz.”
“What?”
“The password is razzmatazz.”
“No it’s not. That’s yesterday’s password.”
“Crud. Can I borrow your codebook?”
Standing, I’d had enough.
“Sit down! Both of you, now,” I said.
“Okay class, what’s wrong with that?” I asked the group.
“Um, he didn’t know today’s code is RaggedyAnn?”
“The other guy didn’t shoot him for not knowing the code?”
I sighed. Recruiting double agents had gotten tougher since the end of the Cold War.
Sipping my coffee, I thought about how far I had fallen. Once the toast of the KGB, I now taught at the “Jersey School for Spies.”
Derek Whisman 3:49pm
The smell greeted me first in the kitchen. Something about the bra in the sink told me that it wasn't just coffee that was brewing.
"You raggedy--"
"Ann!" Mat screamed. He struggled to pull up his pants.
"You're home early," he tried to apologize as if that somehow excused it. Like my early day was to blame for him being a marital double agent with busty Jersey Miller from two houses down.
“You may want to get your bra, Jersey,” I pulled a rolling pin from a nearby drawer. “If you'll excuse us, I have to razz Mat azz.”
You can see from these three that it wasn't an easy decision.
By a whisker, the winner of the contest is Catcaller. Send me your mailing address and a copy of CONFESSIONS OF A FORMER CHILD will be winging its way to you soon!
Thanks to everyone who entered! This was fun!
Friday, July 02, 2010
Writing Contest!
Let other people celebrate the 4th with a bbq or fireworks! We'll celebrate with a writing contest!
I have a copy of CONFESSIONS OF A FORMER CHILD, a hilarious and poignant collection of observational essays by the very talented Dan Tomasulo as a prize. Need further enticement?
Here's an excerpt:
My father was a spy, a double agent for the CIA and the FBI. To conceal his identity from foreign agents he worked as an electrician for Lever Brothers Soap Company.
He had all kinds of neat tools and gadgets that he said were electrician gear, but I knew they were for defusing bombs, hot-wiring cars, and planting wire taps. This was an excellent disguise for a man of his skill and talent.
He never talked about it. We never spoke about his missions, but I am sure he was in demand all over the world.
When he was on an assignment, the secret code he would give to Mom was that he was working a double. That meant that he would go into work at eight o’clock in the morning, work eight hours, then stay there for another eight hours and come home at midnight.
The cover story was that this would double the amount of time he was going to work at the soap factory. What it really meant was that he was a double agent.
He was probably going to protect a foreign ambassador, or maybe steal some secret documents. He might even have to stop an assassin from killing the president.
I love this book a lot! I think you will too. To get your mitts on a copy, enter the contest:
Tell a story in fewer than 1o1 words.
Use these words:
RaggedyAnn
double agent
Jersey
coffee
razzmatazz
Post your entry into the comments section of this blog.
Contest starts now, and runs to midnight on Saturday July 3; 35 hours from now.
Go!
I have a copy of CONFESSIONS OF A FORMER CHILD, a hilarious and poignant collection of observational essays by the very talented Dan Tomasulo as a prize. Need further enticement?
Here's an excerpt:
My father was a spy, a double agent for the CIA and the FBI. To conceal his identity from foreign agents he worked as an electrician for Lever Brothers Soap Company.
He had all kinds of neat tools and gadgets that he said were electrician gear, but I knew they were for defusing bombs, hot-wiring cars, and planting wire taps. This was an excellent disguise for a man of his skill and talent.
He never talked about it. We never spoke about his missions, but I am sure he was in demand all over the world.
When he was on an assignment, the secret code he would give to Mom was that he was working a double. That meant that he would go into work at eight o’clock in the morning, work eight hours, then stay there for another eight hours and come home at midnight.
The cover story was that this would double the amount of time he was going to work at the soap factory. What it really meant was that he was a double agent.
He was probably going to protect a foreign ambassador, or maybe steal some secret documents. He might even have to stop an assassin from killing the president.
I love this book a lot! I think you will too. To get your mitts on a copy, enter the contest:
Tell a story in fewer than 1o1 words.
Use these words:
RaggedyAnn
double agent
Jersey
coffee
razzmatazz
Post your entry into the comments section of this blog.
Contest starts now, and runs to midnight on Saturday July 3; 35 hours from now.
Go!
Thursday, July 01, 2010
Rats!
This newsletter item today might just be Item of the Decade:
2. CASTING RATS FOR A SHORT FILM I'm in need for three to four rats for a short film project. We'll just need them for one day of shooting probably late July or early August. If you have any or know anyone who has some cute rats who'd like some time in front of the camera, please let me know.
Since this is New York City, there are lots of rats but I'm not sure they're actually on the web. And truthfully, I'm not so sure about the cute part either. More like Templeton
2. CASTING RATS FOR A SHORT FILM I'm in need for three to four rats for a short film project. We'll just need them for one day of shooting probably late July or early August. If you have any or know anyone who has some cute rats who'd like some time in front of the camera, please let me know.
Since this is New York City, there are lots of rats but I'm not sure they're actually on the web. And truthfully, I'm not so sure about the cute part either. More like Templeton
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