Sunday, December 05, 2010

wow, I thought I got crazypants letters!






































 via Ron Hogan

31 comments:

Melanie said...

Hahaaha...is that for real? It seems too ridiculous to be authentic. Ed McMahon to post a party at McDonalds. Bwahahahaha...too funny!

Tony Southcotte said...

I wish I would have thought to do that. I never take enough opportunities to troll people and businesses.

Dan said...

Oh, that's beautiful. It's just...wow. I don't know who I feel sorrier for, Mr. Aronson, the telemarketers, or the "quadriplegic hooker from Singapore."

Anne R. Allen said...

Are you sure this isn't somebody's twisted idea of a query letter? I'm pretty sure that same quadriplegic hooker showed up in the Query Shark's blog recently.

IanBontems said...

Ah, thanks for that. Really made me laugh!

Alex Adams said...

I laughed until I cried.

*Goes to find rocks and gold paint*

CKHB said...

Given what I know about the Cash4Gold scam? They more than had this coming. AWESOME.

Toni McGee Causey said...

Whoa. That was like a masters' level of crazy. Even my relatives would be impressed.

Sandra Cormier said...

Seriously, where do you find this stuff???

Marie R said...

Awesome. Maybe this is from one of those "Letters from a Nut" books?

http://browseinside.harpercollins.ca/index.aspx?isbn13=9780380973545

Furious D said...

Sounds like next "feel good story of the summer." You better sign that guy quick. ;)

dylan said...

Dear Ms Reid

Brings to mind this old crazypants classic:

http://www.funnyordie.com/articles/1ab6b0046d/stranger-than-fiction

dylan

Leslie said...

That frame looks like genuine plastic.

Clearly, Cash4Gold knows a keeper when they see one.

Debra L. Schubert said...

Mr. Haberny has some serious rocks.

Dan said...

Unlike literary agents, though, the Cash4Gold people deserve to deal with this kind of insanity, for two reasons:

1) They are a reprehensible company that preys upon the desperate and the ill-informed.

2) That misused apostrophe in "telemarketer's" and their dubious usage of the word "feral."

Kate said...

This is very funny, but obviously a joke. The expositional structure alone...

Tara Maya said...

Oh my. Joke or serious.... it's still a joke. Very, very funny. And I already found the Cash4Gold ads to be pretty funny by themselves.

Shakier Anthem said...

"Feral and preposterous." AHAHAH! I like it, actually... it's sort of poetic.

Gisele said...

Janet, if this is a query letter, you should sign him up at once!

This letter is gold! No pun intended.

CNU said...

Either the guy is insane or... it's actually an incredibly dry "Andy Kaufman" type of humor that apparently "Cash 4 Gold" didn't catch on to. (Personally I think it's the latter. In which case that's hysterical... The former being just sad.)

-C

lotusgirl said...

Wow. Just wow.

jdh said...

My theory is that this Harbeny guy is one of Randy Quaid's star whackers.

Kim Kasch said...

There's more than one story in that letter. Maybe a thriller...

jjdebenedictis said...

To quote one of the Harry Potter characters, "TROOOOOLL! TROLL IN THE DUNGEON!"

And a deliciously evil troll he is, too.

Cathi said...

Oh man, that is priceless! What do those people expect?

Becky Taylor said...

Apparently, Jeff Aronson has no sense of humor.

ryan field said...

As the elite literary would say, "Looks like something *one* would see on facebook." And with a quasi British accent.

Walt M said...

This sounds like an April Fool's joke. I'm just not sure on whom.

kregger said...

I googled this guy, it seems this is his schtick. He sends outrageous letters to whomever he deems worthy to be punked. There are two letters on his web page, one from the West Wing and the other from MoMA in NYC.

He's a waste of creative energy.

Cole Howard said...

If only this letter had arrived in the mailbox of "Cash 4 Crazy." The guy could have been crazy rich.

If this isn't real then it's hilarious.

If it is real, the guy should start his own religion, and commence baptizin' all of us in the spritz that is his insanity. Hallelujah!

DittyMac said...

Hope this wasn't copyrighted as I have already sent it all over. Close friends in gold-buying industry will wet themselves.