Don't call me.
The only people who should ever dial my telephone number are signed clients, or people I've asked to call me.
If you've sent a query and want to follow up: do NOT call me.
If you've read my website and want to run an idea past me: do NOT call me.
(finish the book, then (surprise!) email me
If you want to invite me to a conference: do NOT call me!
If you're an editor with a seven figure offer...oh wait. Yes, you can call me. But really, there's no need. I'll be right over.