A week or so ago I was sitting in my agent’s office, signing some contracts.
ME: Uh, was I supposed to sign this page?
AGENT: (peering through the cloud of brimstone and smoke that swirls around her perpetually) No!
Does it have your name next to it?
I'm not sure whether this is an improvement over being run over by a cement mixer, being made into a ninja droid, or being made someone's crotchety great aunt-- all of which I've seen in the last couple manuscripts from my ..ahem...beloved clients!